Fixing "Songs from a Different Shore"

[ysabetwordsmith]

The poem "Songs from a Different Shore" needs work.

First, I goofed on the ballet.  I looked up songs to be recorded in the music box, including historic ballets, but forgot to check the exact premier date.  "The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies" came out too late, in 1892, as my_partner_doug pointed out.  One of the ground rules for writing alternate history is

Comments

[siege]

"Distant" to me implies both longing and adventure. One sails to a distant shore, to hear the songs of another land, and perform miracles of adventure thereon.

"Different" suggests the shore is maybe not even that distant. But when one goes to a different shore, it is alien in many ways, even if there are many similarities. There are songs, and there are dancers who dance, but they are not the songs and dances and dancers one might know from home.

I like "different" over "distant". France and Spain have different shores than Britain, and though they are only hours from each other by sailing ship, the cultures there are not the same. It is only proximity and mutual conflict that has allowed them to mix. In this way, the shore of Maryam's mother's home, so very distant, is something she tries to bring closer -- and teach the peoples around her. Different, but not so far after all.

[tuftears]

Just in terms of melody, I like 'Distant Shore' more than 'Different Shore'. The '-fer' syllable seems tongue-tripping.

[catsittingstill]

For me distant implies physical distance. While different implies...well, this is science fiction / fantasy, so I think of a shore on a different plane--perhaps a fairyland shore that overlays the physical shore but to pass, or even see, from one to the other you have to know the trick of it.

Even so, title-wise I prefer "distant shore" perhaps because it's a combination I see more often.

[marina_bonomi]

"Different Shore" feels just perfect to me.
'Distant' is either far away or 'felt' distant, disconnected, separated from oneself, Africa is 'different' to Maryam since she doesn't know it first hand, she may have misconceptions about it, doubts or curiosities but Africa isn't 'distant' to her, she carries it within herself and it's so near she wants to have what she can *with* her in the music box.