You have never been more lovely.

[yousmellgood13]

Have you ever just felt ready to burst? Berkeley and its loveliness has changed me completely. And I'm just beginning to appreciate it. I'm afraid to leave this place and the people who have consumed my thoughts for the past few months. Portland is wonderful in its familiarity. But, in the past few days, it's hit me that my freshman year in college is over. And with it goes a spirit of adventure that I don't want to let go. I am itching with sadness and excitement and anxiety and nostalgia. I don't know what to expect from the summer. I don't want the normalcy that past summers have brought because I have a feeling it won't satisfy this appetite. I want to meet new people and discover the magic that the bay area and its crazies has thrown at me. Last night, we ate on the patio and rode skateboards around the parking lot and walked in the Claremont neighborhood. Wisteria was pungent, the warmth of summer nights hung in the air and the birds were surprisingly harmonious despite the late hour. We came home, turned on Christmas lights and enjoyed the breeze passing through the living room. This place is all too sweet. I don't know how to leave something that I cherish so completely.

The sunshine.
I'm beginning to like this...
Time slips to nothing
and I'm better than I've ever been.
I'm suspended.

~ Matt Nathanson