(no subject)
Hey beauty pageant organizers, you're not so fucking special. Every year you seem surprised when a photo of one of these girls pops up with her making kissy faces, grabbing her boobs or smacking her friend's ass. You threaten to take away any title they might have won because they're breaking some special pageant code. Well guess, what...they're just doing what most other girls 18-24 do...drinking with their friends when the annoying one pulls out the digital camera. The more they drink, the more she forgets that the camera is there, and with digital cameras, they're posted on the internet and in the news within hours. So fucking what? You're going to strip them of titles for being...normal?
Its not like your pageants have any redeaming qualities to them. Why don't we call them for what they are; whore parades. Does that sound a little harsh? Well you're the fuckers that set these up, so maybe that's your fault. I know...you just want to show the unique and individuality of all of these girls. How is having them march out in a bikini and you ranking them on a pre-determined scale of perfection show how unique they are? No one really cares about how they would handle deplomacy in Iraq or how they would improve our nation's school system. You want to know the pageant that people would actually like to see?
Announcer: Miss Alaska, first question. You're from a region that is home to a lot of eskimos. That has the pannel concerned that you don't take care of the area under your bikini.
Miss Alaska: Is that a question?
Announcer: So what is it? Bush country? Bush lite? Smooth as the baluga that your parents are eating for dinner tonight?
Miss Alaska: I'm really not sure what you're asking...
Announcer: I'm sorry, times up. Miss Alabama...when are you going to do something about those tits?
You treat your pageants like they really are and people will actually watch that shit. If you keep pretending that you're celebrating women's brains and not just their bodies, than people are going to laugh in your fucking faces. And if you keep treating these girls like they shouldn't be able to playfully grab their friend's tits after 2 shots of Pucker, then they'll never be able to acheive their dream of posing in Playboy and fucking that one guy with the huge dick...Rosie O'donnell.