(no subject)
Sitting in the cafe.
"What am I worth?"
The girl with the swollen eyes asks me quietly. I refuse to answer as she plays with the foam atop her latte. I ignore the tears falling from her glistening wet face , plummeting onto the clean tabletop.
Sitting in the cafe. Watching her tuck her short dark hair behind her ears as she always does. Observing her face. Her lips radio flier red from muffling her sobs. Her eye's looking at the foam she is flicking everywhere with her straw. Her nose moving with each attempt to hold the snot from her draining nose.
"What...are you afraid to answer me truthfully?"
"Sorry" I say "I spaced out".
I remember when when she wasn't like this. I recall her being happy(or at least pretending to be)once.
"Well?" she demands while lifting one eyebrow.
"Nothing, apparently you are worth nothing" I say as she looks up from her cold abandoned latte. She fakes a smile and says "Honesty is all I've ever asked from you Christopher." Closing her eyes, she inhales deeply and exhales a thank you. Looking at me in the eye's I can feel the aura of sadness coming from her pefctly blue iris's.
She would kill herself tonight. I knew this, I also knew that I wasn't going to stop her this time. You may think that's harsh, or wrong or irresponsible. But the truth is, it doesn't really matter what you think. It's sad to have something so beautiful wasted. You don't know this situation, I do. Which is why I believe in this. Trust me...she's better off dead.
Sitting in the cafe. Staring into her perfectly flawed eyes. Remembering the day she snapped. Knowing she was recalling the same event.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Kathy, I'm home" Christopher announced as he entered our shitty apartment. I could hear his loud footsteps approaching the coffee table in the living room. His mammoth hands sifting through the unpaid bills. Humming whatever bad song from the 80's was on the radio moments before.
"My mother wants us to come for dinner tonight if that's alright with you. It would be nice to have a home cooked meal, ya know?"
"What have I done?" I asked myself softly as I stared at my distorted portrait in the dirty bathroom mirror. Pushing my hair out of my face, smearing the blood on my cheeks as the knife falls from my hand.
"Kathy...why aren't you answering me" I hear him question with slight panic in his voice. I try to respond but nothing escapes from my lips but a soft breath. I try to grip the sink, but fail as the blood that was pooled in my hands makes the sink feel like a wet bar of soap. Becoming paralyzed on the disgusting bathroom floor. My eyes fall to the doorway. Christopher's booming gait getting closer with each ounce of blood I lose.
"Kathy!" He yells. "THERE'S SO MUCH BLOOD, YOU'RE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! WHY!?" He screams while trying to hold my head up. His breathing getting heavier and heavier as mine gets more shallow. Fishing for his cellphone that we can't afford. Crying to the guy at 911 who's telling him to calm down. I make eye contact with him.
"Whoops..." I spit out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Let's go for a walk in the park today"
I suggest trying to break the silence. She produces another transparent smile.
"You always know how to cheer me up." She lies as she gives me a kiss. I pay for the coffee we didn't drink. Knowing this would be our last day together I let out a sigh as I leave the tip.
We stroll around the park. Looking at all the meaningless nature, and families we'll never mimic. Her pink flowered dress flowing with each step of her combat boot enveloped feet. We stop to watch the waterfowl pick at each other. As I hold her in my arms, I rest my chin on her sweet smelling hair. She wasn't meant to live past 23 she told me once. If only I would've known how true that was.
"Kathy" I say lightly "I love you."
~~~~~~~~the end~~~~~~~~
Sorry it's a long entry...I just wrote it and needed to type it somewhere.
"What am I worth?"
The girl with the swollen eyes asks me quietly. I refuse to answer as she plays with the foam atop her latte. I ignore the tears falling from her glistening wet face , plummeting onto the clean tabletop.
Sitting in the cafe. Watching her tuck her short dark hair behind her ears as she always does. Observing her face. Her lips radio flier red from muffling her sobs. Her eye's looking at the foam she is flicking everywhere with her straw. Her nose moving with each attempt to hold the snot from her draining nose.
"What...are you afraid to answer me truthfully?"
"Sorry" I say "I spaced out".
I remember when when she wasn't like this. I recall her being happy(or at least pretending to be)once.
"Well?" she demands while lifting one eyebrow.
"Nothing, apparently you are worth nothing" I say as she looks up from her cold abandoned latte. She fakes a smile and says "Honesty is all I've ever asked from you Christopher." Closing her eyes, she inhales deeply and exhales a thank you. Looking at me in the eye's I can feel the aura of sadness coming from her pefctly blue iris's.
She would kill herself tonight. I knew this, I also knew that I wasn't going to stop her this time. You may think that's harsh, or wrong or irresponsible. But the truth is, it doesn't really matter what you think. It's sad to have something so beautiful wasted. You don't know this situation, I do. Which is why I believe in this. Trust me...she's better off dead.
Sitting in the cafe. Staring into her perfectly flawed eyes. Remembering the day she snapped. Knowing she was recalling the same event.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Kathy, I'm home" Christopher announced as he entered our shitty apartment. I could hear his loud footsteps approaching the coffee table in the living room. His mammoth hands sifting through the unpaid bills. Humming whatever bad song from the 80's was on the radio moments before.
"My mother wants us to come for dinner tonight if that's alright with you. It would be nice to have a home cooked meal, ya know?"
"What have I done?" I asked myself softly as I stared at my distorted portrait in the dirty bathroom mirror. Pushing my hair out of my face, smearing the blood on my cheeks as the knife falls from my hand.
"Kathy...why aren't you answering me" I hear him question with slight panic in his voice. I try to respond but nothing escapes from my lips but a soft breath. I try to grip the sink, but fail as the blood that was pooled in my hands makes the sink feel like a wet bar of soap. Becoming paralyzed on the disgusting bathroom floor. My eyes fall to the doorway. Christopher's booming gait getting closer with each ounce of blood I lose.
"Kathy!" He yells. "THERE'S SO MUCH BLOOD, YOU'RE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! WHY!?" He screams while trying to hold my head up. His breathing getting heavier and heavier as mine gets more shallow. Fishing for his cellphone that we can't afford. Crying to the guy at 911 who's telling him to calm down. I make eye contact with him.
"Whoops..." I spit out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Let's go for a walk in the park today"
I suggest trying to break the silence. She produces another transparent smile.
"You always know how to cheer me up." She lies as she gives me a kiss. I pay for the coffee we didn't drink. Knowing this would be our last day together I let out a sigh as I leave the tip.
We stroll around the park. Looking at all the meaningless nature, and families we'll never mimic. Her pink flowered dress flowing with each step of her combat boot enveloped feet. We stop to watch the waterfowl pick at each other. As I hold her in my arms, I rest my chin on her sweet smelling hair. She wasn't meant to live past 23 she told me once. If only I would've known how true that was.
"Kathy" I say lightly "I love you."
~~~~~~~~the end~~~~~~~~
Sorry it's a long entry...I just wrote it and needed to type it somewhere.