Seeing From Other People's Perspective
I was reading this old piece called "Father Forgets." The narrator is sharing his feelings with his sleeping son and adds, "I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hours.
I tried to imagine what the kid would think if he had heard his father's apology and mission to be nicer to his young boy. The kid would probably understand that his father would be nicer and that his father was happy, so the kid would feel good.
But he wouldn't truly understand the apology. The need to change, the need to treat his kid better, his renewed understanding that his son is just a child, and him feeling good that he's going to be a better dad.
I started wondering what feelings older, more experienced people in life have that I can't understand. These feelings probably drive a lot of their behavior, especially when it seems irrational to me. Some I might know, like older people needing to feel useful, but others might only come with experience or imagining myself in their shoes.
Some others I thought of (when older people teach me or disciplined me or been nice to me...some may seem random, but based on specific interactions mostl with mentors):
-Wanting to leave a mark on the world through me ( a lesson learned and passed on)
-Wanting to improve world for their own children (explains the guys who scream at you for driving fast)
-Wanting to help a younger person avoid mistakes he made and hard to learn from
-Needing to live vicariously through me
Anyway, that's all I could think of for now...and it's not just people older, but people with different experiences. A person whose been victimized, might be doing things from the position of trying to maintain their power to stay in control.
Good stuff to remember when dealing with people, especially when you can't figure out why they're acting a certain way
I tried to imagine what the kid would think if he had heard his father's apology and mission to be nicer to his young boy. The kid would probably understand that his father would be nicer and that his father was happy, so the kid would feel good.
But he wouldn't truly understand the apology. The need to change, the need to treat his kid better, his renewed understanding that his son is just a child, and him feeling good that he's going to be a better dad.
I started wondering what feelings older, more experienced people in life have that I can't understand. These feelings probably drive a lot of their behavior, especially when it seems irrational to me. Some I might know, like older people needing to feel useful, but others might only come with experience or imagining myself in their shoes.
Some others I thought of (when older people teach me or disciplined me or been nice to me...some may seem random, but based on specific interactions mostl with mentors):
-Wanting to leave a mark on the world through me ( a lesson learned and passed on)
-Wanting to improve world for their own children (explains the guys who scream at you for driving fast)
-Wanting to help a younger person avoid mistakes he made and hard to learn from
-Needing to live vicariously through me
Anyway, that's all I could think of for now...and it's not just people older, but people with different experiences. A person whose been victimized, might be doing things from the position of trying to maintain their power to stay in control.
Good stuff to remember when dealing with people, especially when you can't figure out why they're acting a certain way