(no subject)
Gosh I hate being so darn emotional. Maybe it's because I'm on my period, maybe because my life this week has just taken a big turn and sucked major ass. It could be both but wow have I been crying, sobbing, weeping, tearing up and everything inbetween more than ever. It feels like I've cried more in the past 3 days than I have in about 2 months. You really think you can rely on your family for hard times, but in my case, I CANT. They're the ones that are tearing me apart-bit by bit. Just when I think I can run to someone, they're not here to help. Just when I need someone the most, they're gone. I feel like i've been buried alive on a deserted island. No one is there, no one can rescue me, no one can hear me. I'm there to rot.
Why does God put me through times like this? I try to pray to him to help me, but I just feel neglected by him, by my parents and loved ones. Am I not that important of a person for someone to care even a little about?
I really try. I work and get taken advantage of. I get paid next to nothing for a job that deserves alot more. I go to school and try to do my best. I take 4 classes-difficult and time consuming classes. And I even know what I want to do for my career. I've loved someone with all my heart and he's been taken away from me. Just like that he was gone. He's gone for a good part of 4 years. Am I just to sit around and wait? It's so hurtful.
I really wish I was burried so I wouldnt have to deal with all of this. Im crying on the outside and dying on the inside. My heart is crumbling and my soul is fading away.
Everything is at reaching distance but when I go to reach for it, it gets farther and farther away. If I were to run for it, it'd run away from me. Nothing, and nobody is on my side.
It's so hard being alone.
Why does God put me through times like this? I try to pray to him to help me, but I just feel neglected by him, by my parents and loved ones. Am I not that important of a person for someone to care even a little about?
I really try. I work and get taken advantage of. I get paid next to nothing for a job that deserves alot more. I go to school and try to do my best. I take 4 classes-difficult and time consuming classes. And I even know what I want to do for my career. I've loved someone with all my heart and he's been taken away from me. Just like that he was gone. He's gone for a good part of 4 years. Am I just to sit around and wait? It's so hurtful.
I really wish I was burried so I wouldnt have to deal with all of this. Im crying on the outside and dying on the inside. My heart is crumbling and my soul is fading away.
Everything is at reaching distance but when I go to reach for it, it gets farther and farther away. If I were to run for it, it'd run away from me. Nothing, and nobody is on my side.
It's so hard being alone.