i was born in the bottom of a wishingwell
"Jelly Roll Blues #37"
I just bought a new watch, says theres no time for you
yea i just bought a new watch, it says theres no time for you
I got it glued onto my eyeballs, maybe you should get one too
I cut my telephone wire, i didnt want to hear it ring
Yea i cut my telephone wire, couldnt stand to hear it ring
but you got through to me somehow and you didnt say a thing
Well i hear you talking loudly when others are around
Yes you talk so very loudly when the others are around
But youre voiceless by your lonesome and you never make a sound
i saw your brand new hair cut, you must be feeling really new
yea I saw your brand new hair cut, you must be feeling so new
But it just looked too pretty and i didnt even notice it was you
Now im working at a great job, they work me all eight days a week
yea im working at a great job, they work me all eight days a week
But i got no time for no one and they put me in the oven when i speak
-
"Song for a Sailor"
Out with me maties on the oceans we ride
searching for crannies, the treasure to hide
From starboard to stern, all we be drunk
And Captain Argoyle thunks he be a skunk
To Portsmouth, to Lisbon, to Tripoli, there
To Indies, to San Juan and Legionnaire's Square
For the gold we be hunting and shimmering silk
from coast to the coast for new potions and milk
Argh! I lost me leg when the sharks was be bitin
with me blood in the water, i's no longer a fightin
Now i walk on a stump for the joke of me boys
and thump on the floorboards to make me the noise
Me eyeballs were lost, it wasnt me fault
I'd had two men's fills of liquor and malt
Down to me belly the alky did throw
and out of me eyelids me eyeballs did flow
-
"Talkin People Blues"
Well ive got my feet
and they're wearing my shoes
got my baseball cap
and my newspaper news
tucked under my elbow
and my dogs are tamed
I'm going downtown where we all look the same
Got my eyelashes fluttered
and my face in the mirror
and my sunglasses backwards
so my face looks clearer
hand me my matching umbrella
so i can hide from the rain
I'm walking downtown where they all look the same
Flag me a taxi, man
I've got to go
to the Fancy Man's Opera
and the interview show
I'm a big time hustler
and im driving my fame
and now im going downtown where they all look the same
Check out the rings on my fingers
dont they look so nice?
I got them for free
for an expensive price
i got steel tin-foil
wrapped around my brain
So im goin to the city where they all look the same
Well my brother's a beatle
and my mother's an ant
I got a coalmine facelift
and i walk with a slant
took the garbage out last night
and it left a stain
So im goin back downtown where they all look the same
I gotta walk in two's
yea i cant walk alone
i'm singing joy to the world
but my face is a stone
I got an oversized sweater
cause the seasons have changed
So i'm goin downtown, we can all look the same
Let's all talk real loud now
we've got to be heard
i know the alphabet backwards
but i cant say a word
i got a voice like a monkey
but i dont dress as plain
So i hang with the monkeys cause they all look the same
Well my feet are small
but my car is large
I'm going down the highway
in a two-ton barge
I got cracks in my ceiling
But who can i blame?
i'm headed to the city where they all look the same
Well I can't quite be me
but i cant quite be you
I'm in a midlife crisis
lord, what will i do?
I'll test out some lampshades
and extinguish the flame
Then i'll put on my hotpants and we'll all look the same