my life right now (like anyone cares)
im finally getting my stuff to transfer out all in order. i have been thinking about this a lot and wondering if its the right thing to do. i decided i am that i am really unhappy here and if i wish i was at home all the time, doesnt it make sense to just leave? i dont know why i came here anymore. i thought i wanted to go away to college but once i got here i realized i was wrong. i really did try though, and it was just too hard. so im getting all my shit straight and ill be home next semester. which is good i think. who knows, maybe im just not mature enough for this yet (being away). everyone always talks about how much they wanted to get out of their houses and away from their parents...i guess i just think differently. i mean, for my whole life my family is all i had...theyre the only ones who will definitely be by my side through whatever happens. im really lucky to have such a great family, and i miss that. going out to breakfast on sundays and watching my cousins on the weekend. its like theyve always been there and i miss being away from that. i know that you have to grow up sometime, but why cant i just be at home and grow up there? my aunts say some people would kill to have the chance to go away to college, but i guess im not one of those people. i dont like change, even if it might be good. i like to be in my comfort zone...and i dont care if that sounds immature or stupid. its just how i am, how ive always been. another reason is i dont want to wait until i get out of college to start my life. if i stayed here, id be a student for the next 4 years. when i go home, ill go to school for two years and maybe in that time get a really good job and my own place and jump into being an adult. i suppose everyone has to change in some way or another sooner or later, but i think it would be better for me if i could be at home. i dont know...
this thursday im going home for the weekend. im so excited...4 days of not being here! friday im taking my placement exam at macomb. itll be cool...cause i can finally say im coming to be at home next semester. plus i think school will be easier because ill have my mom to nag me about homework and studying and stuff. i actually miss that...can you believe it?!?
alicia and my mom came to see me this weekend. they came on saturday and we went to the hotel and basically relaxed. we went swimming and saw this girl who looked about 15. she was all up on some guys dick who looked like he could be her grandpa! it was soooo nasty. why dont people try to stay in their own generations? i mean, lets say theres someone in their 30's and someone in their 20's. i think thats ok, but someone whose twenty something and an old grandpa??? ewwwww i dont want to think about THEIR sex life. gag me.
this friday is me and brandons 7 months. 5 more till a year!! i didnt think that in this short time i could love someone so much. he means the world to me. i can just look at him and smile. i think love is being caring and protective, taking things one day at a time. its when you can look at someone and know you dont want to be with anyone else. heres a good quote i heard from someone:
"being in love is thinking you are, which is believing, which is knowing"
you might have to read it a few times before you understand it.
well, im just talking about retarded shit now, so ill get going. i should study for my bio exam. katie call me we gotta get together when i come home this weekend!!
this thursday im going home for the weekend. im so excited...4 days of not being here! friday im taking my placement exam at macomb. itll be cool...cause i can finally say im coming to be at home next semester. plus i think school will be easier because ill have my mom to nag me about homework and studying and stuff. i actually miss that...can you believe it?!?
alicia and my mom came to see me this weekend. they came on saturday and we went to the hotel and basically relaxed. we went swimming and saw this girl who looked about 15. she was all up on some guys dick who looked like he could be her grandpa! it was soooo nasty. why dont people try to stay in their own generations? i mean, lets say theres someone in their 30's and someone in their 20's. i think thats ok, but someone whose twenty something and an old grandpa??? ewwwww i dont want to think about THEIR sex life. gag me.
this friday is me and brandons 7 months. 5 more till a year!! i didnt think that in this short time i could love someone so much. he means the world to me. i can just look at him and smile. i think love is being caring and protective, taking things one day at a time. its when you can look at someone and know you dont want to be with anyone else. heres a good quote i heard from someone:
"being in love is thinking you are, which is believing, which is knowing"
you might have to read it a few times before you understand it.
well, im just talking about retarded shit now, so ill get going. i should study for my bio exam. katie call me we gotta get together when i come home this weekend!!