I wanted to walk through all the empty streets and feel something constant under my feet.
Oh man, there is nothing better than listening to Beck on a day like today. Semi-rainy with a light breeze. Wait, I'm not a weather reporter...sorry about that.
Today was the last day of volleyball camp, except I didn't go. I had to ride my bike to the camp, but I decided that I would much rather just ride to the river instead. When I got to the river all was well and I sat on my favorite bench and started to read. I read for about an hour and then decided to write. While I was writing, a truly creepy man with a cigarette started staring at me. It scared me a bit, but I tried to ignore his glances. He then started walking toward me. Frantically, I got up and moved seven benches down. Everything was going swell, I was moving chapter after chapter in my book but then, I look over my shoulder and I see the creepy man again. This just scared me so much that I thought I was going to faint. I stayed perfectly still on my bench and avoided eye contact with the man. After he passed me, he kept looking over his shoulder...this scared me very much but, I stayed on my bench.
Five minutes later, I kept thinking of old terrible terrible memories and I freaked out. Then old habits came back and i'll let you figure out what happend. I started crying and I got on my bike and headed to where my volleyball camp was. I was crying uncontrollably and everything just flooded my mind.
-Old memories
-I've let so many people down
-The creepy man
-Skipping volleyball
-My neighbor's suicide
-My parents
-Car accidents involving friends
-Heaven
-My future
I was so overwhelmed by all of these things that I had to stop in the middle of the sidewalk and just scream. I kept on crying and rode my bike to where the camp was going to be held. I felt so bad for some reason about skipping. When I got to the school, I walked in and peered into the gym...I realized I really didn't want to go and I freaked out even more and had another panic attack. I started breathing really hard and I needed to go outside. When I got outside, I just sat down infront of the school and decided to wait for people to come out of the camp. I sat and waited and cried. All I wanted was someone to hug me and tell me I'm not crazy. I waited and waited and no one saw me. I just got on my bike and headed home.
I think I need to leave this place.