Details.
Sometimes I take for granted some details in my life. Here are a few.
Every time I use the toilet, Curly, our cat, will break in and sit right in front of my feet, and just stare at me. Occasionally he sits in the bathtub and curls up, watching with his big marble-like eyes. Sometimes he wants to be petted, sometimes he just wants to hang out. When you are done with your business, he will leave with you.
I now sit up straighter and think about my posture more than ever. I had crippling back spasms a few nights ago in the middle of the night. I had never felt pain quite like it. Because of my awareness of the pain in my back and neck, I sit up straight and it seems to put less pressure on areas I just recently got adjusted. I can only describe the minor spasms as spiders deep in my back, crawling around. It really sucks when you back feels like jelly and any support might cause tremors. Don't take it for granted, take care of yourself.
Whenever we sit in silence during a short meditation before kendo practice, I can hear the buzzing of the racket ball court's light bulbs.
Michael and I look like complete opposites. Michael is very white, has reddish hair, blue eyes and is tall with a long torso, long nose and long face. I have darker skin, eyes, hair, rounder face, smaller nose and have longer legs and shorter torso.
I hate the smell of make-up. I accidentally coated everything in my make up bag with some kind of eye stuff I had in there. I sometimes still feel the grease under my nails.
Bonnie's eyes remind me of a deep underwater current.
I was worried that my kitten wouldn't remember me when I left it with my mom for ten days while I was in Japan. I think, even with all the social interaction, I have somehow made an imprint on her. I was worried, until I realized she only sleeps with me every night, and listens when I reprimand her, but not Bonnie and Michael as much. I think when you pour your attention into something or someone, even if it is animal, I think it will understand and try to reciprocate it. Something to remember, I think, as a teacher or parent.
I am learning to take care of things I own better now that I am out of my parents house, since I have to pay for everything and replace it my self. The thing I am learning to take care of the most is the house, and things within.
Hearing your hip pop back into place is the loudest thing in the world since I felt the tremor from my guts and insides.
My chiropractor has Super Saiyan hair.
I am going to just register for school tomorrow even though I am totally broke. I hope by the time school starts, I will have the new job and my parents support. Better to do something as opposed to worry and wait, I think.
It was only after ten days of being forced to eat too much food every night did I understand portions. I now eat about half or 3/4s of restaurant portions. Heavy and light foods mean a little bit more to me.
Bonnie is crocheting 500 purple jelly fish for a job. Somehow she doesn't get bored by taking a break and making an octopus.
When it gets dark and cloudy, it is time to light candles.
I have been worried about various things like reading certain books I feel obligated to (like an astrology book) or seeing my grandmother. I kind of fix these worried by just leaving 'seeds' by picking up books whenever I think about them and not worry when I don't, and just doing things more spur of the moment as opposed to planning them. Somehow planning things for myself lately has been more of a burden.
I have always just been flattered when people pray for me. I felt genuinely better after Michael and Bonnie prayed for me when I was having my back spasms. I still don't feel all that willing to start going to church or something, though I do find myself wanting to research the 'spirituality' I grew up with more; native American and all that. I used to think all of it was silly, now I feel like it is a bit needed.
Lots of crying this week, but I feel so much better because of it. Somehow I think pain washes away weird, lingering emotions like sadness. I feel a lot more clear headed.
I haven't really noticed I haven't had a phone for like three weeks. I am hopeless.
I have been listening to this sound track from my childhood:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cg43tRhrDTg
(:
Every time I use the toilet, Curly, our cat, will break in and sit right in front of my feet, and just stare at me. Occasionally he sits in the bathtub and curls up, watching with his big marble-like eyes. Sometimes he wants to be petted, sometimes he just wants to hang out. When you are done with your business, he will leave with you.
I now sit up straighter and think about my posture more than ever. I had crippling back spasms a few nights ago in the middle of the night. I had never felt pain quite like it. Because of my awareness of the pain in my back and neck, I sit up straight and it seems to put less pressure on areas I just recently got adjusted. I can only describe the minor spasms as spiders deep in my back, crawling around. It really sucks when you back feels like jelly and any support might cause tremors. Don't take it for granted, take care of yourself.
Whenever we sit in silence during a short meditation before kendo practice, I can hear the buzzing of the racket ball court's light bulbs.
Michael and I look like complete opposites. Michael is very white, has reddish hair, blue eyes and is tall with a long torso, long nose and long face. I have darker skin, eyes, hair, rounder face, smaller nose and have longer legs and shorter torso.
I hate the smell of make-up. I accidentally coated everything in my make up bag with some kind of eye stuff I had in there. I sometimes still feel the grease under my nails.
Bonnie's eyes remind me of a deep underwater current.
I was worried that my kitten wouldn't remember me when I left it with my mom for ten days while I was in Japan. I think, even with all the social interaction, I have somehow made an imprint on her. I was worried, until I realized she only sleeps with me every night, and listens when I reprimand her, but not Bonnie and Michael as much. I think when you pour your attention into something or someone, even if it is animal, I think it will understand and try to reciprocate it. Something to remember, I think, as a teacher or parent.
I am learning to take care of things I own better now that I am out of my parents house, since I have to pay for everything and replace it my self. The thing I am learning to take care of the most is the house, and things within.
Hearing your hip pop back into place is the loudest thing in the world since I felt the tremor from my guts and insides.
My chiropractor has Super Saiyan hair.
I am going to just register for school tomorrow even though I am totally broke. I hope by the time school starts, I will have the new job and my parents support. Better to do something as opposed to worry and wait, I think.
It was only after ten days of being forced to eat too much food every night did I understand portions. I now eat about half or 3/4s of restaurant portions. Heavy and light foods mean a little bit more to me.
Bonnie is crocheting 500 purple jelly fish for a job. Somehow she doesn't get bored by taking a break and making an octopus.
When it gets dark and cloudy, it is time to light candles.
I have been worried about various things like reading certain books I feel obligated to (like an astrology book) or seeing my grandmother. I kind of fix these worried by just leaving 'seeds' by picking up books whenever I think about them and not worry when I don't, and just doing things more spur of the moment as opposed to planning them. Somehow planning things for myself lately has been more of a burden.
I have always just been flattered when people pray for me. I felt genuinely better after Michael and Bonnie prayed for me when I was having my back spasms. I still don't feel all that willing to start going to church or something, though I do find myself wanting to research the 'spirituality' I grew up with more; native American and all that. I used to think all of it was silly, now I feel like it is a bit needed.
Lots of crying this week, but I feel so much better because of it. Somehow I think pain washes away weird, lingering emotions like sadness. I feel a lot more clear headed.
I haven't really noticed I haven't had a phone for like three weeks. I am hopeless.
I have been listening to this sound track from my childhood:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cg43tRhrDTg
(: