Not very amused,
but then what can I do about it really. You know what I found out? I pick up on clues in a room. I pick up on "clues". It's annoying. It's really annoying. How I can't just shut up about it just because something doesn't add up, when I pick something up when I try to find the truth through relentless investigation, why do I do that? What if there is no truth to them at all, what if they were inconsequential? Why couldn't I have just thought it is but a small detail instead of the toes of a large picture. I've just exhausted my head over nothing, that kind of thing. Why do I always want everything definite? I always want to know, to the end. I want to know why. Why, everything. I want to know the whole thing until there's nothing left to know anymore. It's nothing personal. Nothing emotionally driven. It's just picking up pages from a torn book and arranging them to make sense of the discarded novel, without a want or a need, just a why and what's the end.
I'm in a bit of a malaise after today's events. Probably because of drinking too much and being baked high. My most important object is missing, this is something I hide with care and carry around so close to my body I'll only let you touch there if I loved you and the action would be more meaningful than fun. If somebody opens that cigarette case I'd have to wriggle my way through lying just to explain something out of my jurisdiction. I just hope nobody will tell, or they will surrender it to me wordlessly. It's definitely troubling, but I'm at ease because whatever happens in the end is what you deserve.
So, I shamelessly overslept today, there was supposed to be a 5 hour practice over at the center and I only attended probably 45 minutes. Not to my detention really or disadvantage, I hate long practices with them and in there. I kind of cut corners earlier, like I cheated. I only need the gist once anyway. People like me are brilliant but sometimes not very driven. Brilliant but laaaazy. Brilliant but heartless. And when I'm half-assed it is always amplified and felt so don't blame me tomorrow, I don't look forward playing there see. And it's a Sunday. Why would you do this to me?
My wrist has been hurting ever since I punched hard and a bit wrongly, too. My knuckles though had just stopped to hurt. It's been a month and a half since then, I feel. So that's terrible right.
Also I find the jokes and the way you tell stories and your opinions a little too discriminating to me. Could you kindly adjust so I wont have to punch your face? I mean, why would you tire me to the last steps off the plank if we can reach an understanding before you even send me there. No no no, darling. Don't test me. I have a high propensity to being violent nowadays, I'm quick to be harsh nowadays, I'm quick to be rude 'cause I'm a little finished, shields are low. The ones I put on you. No more bridles, no hurdles-- I'll be unadulterated. Doormat taken for granted. I hate being "quiet and kind".
I'm listening to the Wolf's Rain OST, and I remember a friend who's a pretty big figure(he's a genius) in music really, though leaning into electronic, not that it is discounted when I placed "though". Well, we connect at an anime level as well. He was the only guy I met who didn't like Wolf's Rain, and that the music couldn't even save the series, he judged. That bad. Now, we were waiting for a cab outside the Collective, and the train was about to pass perpendicularly, the end of the street we were on. So there was an Offspring song playing from Wingman, and at the same time from a different source was the station's one-tone warning for the coming train. He simply said, "It's in key." And an almost unnoticeable smile right, with a turn of the head too, he pointed at something briefly, "Fifth." He said to the one-tone warning and his thoughts probably instantly diverted elsewhere.
I like people like him alot. I don't think I was fascinated by his sharp ears, but rather because he smiled when he said it's in key. That fascinated me more.
Well let's go to sleep, sweetheart. But not after we can stay awake as much as we can, for sleep's sake let's do that first! Even after something tiring, I'd still be up thinking in bed, always the last to sleep! Always awake. When I sleep I'm always awake. Such colorful dreams and when I close my eyes there are explosions of neon colors. Son of god, you wouldn't want to be me
Baby, it's hard.
My hair feels amazing and I actually felt like someone. Not a something. Ha. By the way, I mean I saw this girl in the mall earlier while hunting for dinner. And that is all. Do you know the way to San Jose? I talked to my boyfriend earlier, such lighthearted events keep me going. You don't know what love can do until it happens to you.
Oh dear the gig today was cancelled. It even had the best calltime ever. 12 midnight.
I'm in a bit of a malaise after today's events. Probably because of drinking too much and being baked high. My most important object is missing, this is something I hide with care and carry around so close to my body I'll only let you touch there if I loved you and the action would be more meaningful than fun. If somebody opens that cigarette case I'd have to wriggle my way through lying just to explain something out of my jurisdiction. I just hope nobody will tell, or they will surrender it to me wordlessly. It's definitely troubling, but I'm at ease because whatever happens in the end is what you deserve.
So, I shamelessly overslept today, there was supposed to be a 5 hour practice over at the center and I only attended probably 45 minutes. Not to my detention really or disadvantage, I hate long practices with them and in there. I kind of cut corners earlier, like I cheated. I only need the gist once anyway. People like me are brilliant but sometimes not very driven. Brilliant but laaaazy. Brilliant but heartless. And when I'm half-assed it is always amplified and felt so don't blame me tomorrow, I don't look forward playing there see. And it's a Sunday. Why would you do this to me?
My wrist has been hurting ever since I punched hard and a bit wrongly, too. My knuckles though had just stopped to hurt. It's been a month and a half since then, I feel. So that's terrible right.
Also I find the jokes and the way you tell stories and your opinions a little too discriminating to me. Could you kindly adjust so I wont have to punch your face? I mean, why would you tire me to the last steps off the plank if we can reach an understanding before you even send me there. No no no, darling. Don't test me. I have a high propensity to being violent nowadays, I'm quick to be harsh nowadays, I'm quick to be rude 'cause I'm a little finished, shields are low. The ones I put on you. No more bridles, no hurdles-- I'll be unadulterated. Doormat taken for granted. I hate being "quiet and kind".
I'm listening to the Wolf's Rain OST, and I remember a friend who's a pretty big figure(he's a genius) in music really, though leaning into electronic, not that it is discounted when I placed "though". Well, we connect at an anime level as well. He was the only guy I met who didn't like Wolf's Rain, and that the music couldn't even save the series, he judged. That bad. Now, we were waiting for a cab outside the Collective, and the train was about to pass perpendicularly, the end of the street we were on. So there was an Offspring song playing from Wingman, and at the same time from a different source was the station's one-tone warning for the coming train. He simply said, "It's in key." And an almost unnoticeable smile right, with a turn of the head too, he pointed at something briefly, "Fifth." He said to the one-tone warning and his thoughts probably instantly diverted elsewhere.
I like people like him alot. I don't think I was fascinated by his sharp ears, but rather because he smiled when he said it's in key. That fascinated me more.
Well let's go to sleep, sweetheart. But not after we can stay awake as much as we can, for sleep's sake let's do that first! Even after something tiring, I'd still be up thinking in bed, always the last to sleep! Always awake. When I sleep I'm always awake. Such colorful dreams and when I close my eyes there are explosions of neon colors. Son of god, you wouldn't want to be me
Baby, it's hard.
My hair feels amazing and I actually felt like someone. Not a something. Ha. By the way, I mean I saw this girl in the mall earlier while hunting for dinner. And that is all. Do you know the way to San Jose? I talked to my boyfriend earlier, such lighthearted events keep me going. You don't know what love can do until it happens to you.
Oh dear the gig today was cancelled. It even had the best calltime ever. 12 midnight.