They should want to make you happy, but subliminally even if they don't mean it, it's all about number one, kinda like i'll make you happy if it makes me happy, and if im not happy i'll bitch to you about it, but i'm pretty cynical. I have so much respect for someone willing to show me their bad side or question me, I've come to long for it. Even the best friends are scared to be imperfect, of course it takes alot to show yourself in all your fucked up glory, but we all long to see it from someone else because it makes us feel like were worth it to someone to let our guard down. I've fucked up friendships...countless times, all I can bring myself to say is "I fucked up" as it may surprise people, i'm not perfect, so you can take my sincere apology and we can work through it, or you can let my imperfection (by the way i have to remind them usually that they're subject to making a mistake as well) just blow a hole in a friendship and i'll pack up and move along. I can't be around someone that can't let me fuck up. All in all I think theres some things that you can't rely on some people for, you'll end up devastated. I as sincerely as I can, try to be the person that I needed when I felt like I didn't have anyone who would even attempt to understand. Or just really listen and ask me those questions that I needed to make me see things more clearly. I don't know, I try to be the person that won't fail people like some of the people I cared for failed me, I suppose. It's selfish as hell if you think about it, but you don't hold resentment for them, they just gotta get by like the rest of us...
Reply
Leave a comment