Jun 29, 2011 22:23
[First, the camera moves shakly for a moment as you see some long grass and underbrush. Then once the camera is steady, it will pointed to Keiichi's face. Look at that handsome face.]
Welcome back, Johto viewers to another exciting episode of "Pokemon Hunter K!" As usual, I'm your wonderful host... Maebara Keiichi! Today, I happen to be traveling in the vast Savannah of the Safari Zone. Numerous habitats are home to many Pokemon here, but I'm afraid I can't cover them all in 30 minutes. Regardless, we are now going to be taking a look at another one of these fascinating creatures of the Pokemon world-- The Rhyhorn!
[Then the camera will be aimed towards a Ryhorn who is currently drinking from a drinking from a lake. Doesn't it look peaceful? The distance seems to be close enough to get a good look at him, yet also far away enough for the cameraman to not get himself into any danger!]
Look at that! He has a wonderful coat! That rock hard and spiky skin! It's like an knight covered in the finest of armors! Heh... It looks tough, but I'll bet it's a tenderfoot deep down. Anyway, it is known to be a ground and rock type for all of you trainers out there and it's said to be strong enough to send a trailer flying! Talk about a powerhouse, huh?
... And here's a fun fact! Did you know that Rhyhorns actually have rocks from brains? It's because of that fact that they can remember only one thing at a time! Man... I wonder what the sizes of those rocks are. Walnut sized? Pebble sized? Microscopic? It must have a really low IQ level! [The Rhyhorn stops drinking from the lake to hear Keiichi's rambling. So for that, it shoots off a glare towards the camera and it lets out a low growl.]
Oh, look at that! It seemed to have spotted its pray! Huh! I feel sorry what's going to be in the way of that-- [The Rhyhorn sets itself into position and kicks up some dirt with one foot before it begins to charge in Keiichi's way.]
... ... ... Eh? It... looks like it's coming my way....
[...] And it's... coming fast.
... ... ... [A beat. Then suddenly, the camera will shakily move around as Keiichi starts to RUN LIKE HELL. The camera will shoot the fast moving ground as you'll see Keiichi's running feet, then it moves up to his face.]
... Haaah! Haah! Just my luck! I am now... in pursuit! No, scratch that! I am being pursued by this majestic Pokemon! My tender-yet-accurate description has seemed to have angered the Rhyhorn! [And have a roar from behind Keiichi.]
OI! Don't get angry at me! I was just going by what I saw in the Pokedex!!
[CUE ANOTHER NASTY ROAR FROM THE RHYHORN AS A RESPONSE.]
--S-shit! W-WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!!! [Cliiiiiiick.]
a cruel idiot's thesis,
an epic fail,
you're too *slow*,
!safari zone,
uooooooh,
awesome bonding,
alllll the tears,
trolls gonna troll,
troll meter: full throttle,
keiichi the incompetent,
keep your cool,
plans have gone... down under,
yeaaaaaaaah!!!!