Ari's Reminder That Father's Day Is Sunday So What Did You Get Me? Of The Day.
On my fucking expensive, fucking expansive desk, there is a bronze plaque with my name engraved on it. It's '06, but I swear: I have fucking dozens of them. We were using '02 as a door stopper at Chez Gold before the wife redecorated.
Ari Gold, they all say. Agent Of The Year.
I keep the most recent one on display until I win the next year's. They class up a joint, and they're heavy as fuck, so throwing one really puts the fear of me into an underling. They have sharp corners too.
On the other side of my fucking expensive, fucking expansive desk, there is a coffee mug. Father's Day gift; couple of years ago. I wanted golf clubs; I got a fucking mug. White with black writing. You know the fucking drill.
#1 Dad.
That's a tough fucking competition. I mean, me against Josh Weinfuck, the baby eaters collectively, the walking dead, and Princess Coldstare? No fucking contest. But there are a lot of baby's daddies out there.
So one guess which object means fucking more to me.
...
The agent of the year award. Are you fucking retarded?
Ari Gold, they all say. Agent Of The Year.
I keep the most recent one on display until I win the next year's. They class up a joint, and they're heavy as fuck, so throwing one really puts the fear of me into an underling. They have sharp corners too.
On the other side of my fucking expensive, fucking expansive desk, there is a coffee mug. Father's Day gift; couple of years ago. I wanted golf clubs; I got a fucking mug. White with black writing. You know the fucking drill.
#1 Dad.
That's a tough fucking competition. I mean, me against Josh Weinfuck, the baby eaters collectively, the walking dead, and Princess Coldstare? No fucking contest. But there are a lot of baby's daddies out there.
So one guess which object means fucking more to me.
...
The agent of the year award. Are you fucking retarded?