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" What hurts the most, was being so close"
-L's lj.
This was so apt, it rendered me utterly speechless.
Dear God, i really need you to bring me back to where we started. Feels so long since we last talked properly. This week has been so hectic, everything's moving too quickly, I am starting to get so confused, i dont know what to think. Please show up.
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I'm starting to get used to the routine in Ac, waking up stinking early, feeling better in a better looking uniform, rushing to catch the 620 bus, not talking to Sarra for entire bus ride cause we're both darn grumpy in the morning, seeing Eve, sitting at the bleachers ( def one of my highlights of the day) just talking, breaks with pearlyn, teasing priscilla, having the occasional feel good bumping into Dorisa/ lailing/ Jac, and others( i really miss my Og, and myrrrrrrrrrrrron where'd you go? ), leaving class bewildered, feeling stinking pissed at se poi and his inefficiency and my inadequatecy in my once best subject, which that perv is ruining, working my brains out in econs; hist and gp, chinese is craaaaaaaaazy, sleeping in pw and lit, eating heck alot, dreading my once a week training, loving wednesdays, still not getting used to the long distance,
\missing you.
And realizing that you probably dont. care.
Argh.
And i just realized that i completely crapped out a paragraph of my boring life that you guys wouldnt care about too.
Ha-ha.
"I feel like I've swallowed an eternity of despair.
Nothing I say makes sense any longer. It used to, I think, but not anymore. Every sentence I "write", is stupid, numb, overused. But if I lose this, I lose everything. I don't know how else to express myself" -N
p/s: looking forward to tomorrow, i really need good company, plus quality conversations.
Janice, Eve, Sarra and Shopaholic FTW/
p/p/s: Feeling damn scared for heats on monday, and scrabble ( joke) on weds.
p/p/s: Sorry for the consistent lack of updates.
MY TUMMY HURTS LIKE DOGGGGGGGGGGG. :(