(no subject)
8 DAYS until he's back in my arms...
*sigh* Wow. I never thought it would be like this. I usually miss people like crazy when they are gone, but I'm just really starting to feel the pangs of emptiness. I wish he would come home sooner. But he's having a good time, or at least I hope so, and that's all that matters...right? I'm just having a hell of a time lately with everyone and everything. And the thing that really sucks is that since he was gone for two whole weeks, his mom probably won't let him do anything with me because she wants to see him. More or less, she wants him to clean the house. She is so annoyingly inconvenient. Its not that I miss the comfort he provided (which I do), I miss Rich... as a whole... as a person. He takes good care of me, and one of the best things about our relationship is that he always surprises me with something. Its like he knows exactly what I like, what I want, how I feel... the last one is not always true, but then again, all guys can be perceived as blind to that one.
Have you ever thought that you could trust someone not to let you down? You know... your best friend in the whole world, maybe? They said they'd always be there for you and listen, all the while keeping your promise? I'm disappointed. Because the one person I trusted to be my best friend, above all else, has let me down AGAIN. I know that he can't be there for me in person, but he never calls me. He's completely jealous of Rich and it makes him seem like a huge asshole sometimes. He's shutting me out and he almost failed school. I feel like he doesn't care anymore. He and I were supposed to do this thing. When we were kids, we got matching necklaces. I sent him mine for Christmas, and he was supposed to send me his. The deal was that whenever we met again (its been seven years), we'd give each other our necklaces back. Well he never sent me his. And he promised me he would. He says that he keeps forgetting, which hurts even more. He forgets me? I'd never forget him and yet he forgets about me all the time obviously. It doesn't seem to matter to him anymore. And it just hurts... a lot. Before, he was the one person I could talk to if it seemed like everyone else in the world hated me or if my parents were fighting or if I was having boy problems, or even if I was bored. It seems like he's avoiding me, and there was that one week that I felt like all my friends betrayed me and I hated them all and I never wanted to speak to them again, and I found out they were talking behind my back. That happened for quite a while. I cried the whole freaking day, I was so heartbroken. And I called him and he said he couldn't talk, he was watching tv. Guys are so insensitive sometimes. But its okay. I've got Rich, and Carri, and maybe even Amber. And Lin-z. I would say Mom, but she's still pretty much wacko at the moment, and even before then, she wasn't very... I don't know. Anyway, the point is that I'm still upset.
To keep me busy, I've taken up a project... duh duh DUH! The monster purse... I have to go to Michael's to get the stuff, but I'm going to have some fun with that. I'm also going to have my mom teach me how to use her sewing machine so I can revamp some of my really boring t-shirts. So here's what my purse should look like when I'm done with it. It's so cute. *squeal*
http://www.craftster.org/forum/index.php?topic=34261.0
Hmm... I've been doing a lot of thinking about school next year. I'm going to have fun with this.
I predict that my schedule will look something like this:
Precalculus - Blubaum/Sentner
Chemistry Honors - Cummines/Kunick
AP English - Nellis (Horn)
AP American History - Chittum
French I - Weiskopf
Psychology/Sociology - Griffin
And I signed up for seventh lunch. I have to go pick up Melissa afterschool most likely.
No more ROTC... so no more wardrobe domination.
Ugh. I'm pretty sure those are the only teachers who teach that subject. Anyway....
Clubs to think about joining:
National Honor Society
Interact
French Club
I have to make up for Colorguard and Armed Drill...
I don't know why, but I don't think I'll be going to Homecoming this year. I don't have a dress, and I just don't feel like it. I'll have plenty of opportunities to go dance. Like the ROTC Holiday Dance (Nobody wears a dress for that), Military Ball (I'll need a dress for that), and JUNIOR PROM (I already have my dress for that)! *all excited* On the other hand... the Homecoming football game was the first date I had with Rich, and the dance was where we had our first kiss. It was wonderful... fireworks, stars, weak knees, the whole sha-bang. I don't know. I guess we'll see.
Does anyone know any place that is hiring? I need a job something fierce...
I cleaned out my makeup drawer... I need some new makeup. Some lipgloss, some mascara, and some black eyeliner. Maybe some eyeshadow. *raises an eyebrow* I'm allowed to wear it now that I'm sixteen. I saw this commercial on tv for eyeshadow that goes with your eyecolor. Maybe it's worth a try. Anyhoo... I'm running out of stuff to talk about. Feeling a little better...
*sigh* Wow. I never thought it would be like this. I usually miss people like crazy when they are gone, but I'm just really starting to feel the pangs of emptiness. I wish he would come home sooner. But he's having a good time, or at least I hope so, and that's all that matters...right? I'm just having a hell of a time lately with everyone and everything. And the thing that really sucks is that since he was gone for two whole weeks, his mom probably won't let him do anything with me because she wants to see him. More or less, she wants him to clean the house. She is so annoyingly inconvenient. Its not that I miss the comfort he provided (which I do), I miss Rich... as a whole... as a person. He takes good care of me, and one of the best things about our relationship is that he always surprises me with something. Its like he knows exactly what I like, what I want, how I feel... the last one is not always true, but then again, all guys can be perceived as blind to that one.
Have you ever thought that you could trust someone not to let you down? You know... your best friend in the whole world, maybe? They said they'd always be there for you and listen, all the while keeping your promise? I'm disappointed. Because the one person I trusted to be my best friend, above all else, has let me down AGAIN. I know that he can't be there for me in person, but he never calls me. He's completely jealous of Rich and it makes him seem like a huge asshole sometimes. He's shutting me out and he almost failed school. I feel like he doesn't care anymore. He and I were supposed to do this thing. When we were kids, we got matching necklaces. I sent him mine for Christmas, and he was supposed to send me his. The deal was that whenever we met again (its been seven years), we'd give each other our necklaces back. Well he never sent me his. And he promised me he would. He says that he keeps forgetting, which hurts even more. He forgets me? I'd never forget him and yet he forgets about me all the time obviously. It doesn't seem to matter to him anymore. And it just hurts... a lot. Before, he was the one person I could talk to if it seemed like everyone else in the world hated me or if my parents were fighting or if I was having boy problems, or even if I was bored. It seems like he's avoiding me, and there was that one week that I felt like all my friends betrayed me and I hated them all and I never wanted to speak to them again, and I found out they were talking behind my back. That happened for quite a while. I cried the whole freaking day, I was so heartbroken. And I called him and he said he couldn't talk, he was watching tv. Guys are so insensitive sometimes. But its okay. I've got Rich, and Carri, and maybe even Amber. And Lin-z. I would say Mom, but she's still pretty much wacko at the moment, and even before then, she wasn't very... I don't know. Anyway, the point is that I'm still upset.
To keep me busy, I've taken up a project... duh duh DUH! The monster purse... I have to go to Michael's to get the stuff, but I'm going to have some fun with that. I'm also going to have my mom teach me how to use her sewing machine so I can revamp some of my really boring t-shirts. So here's what my purse should look like when I'm done with it. It's so cute. *squeal*
http://www.craftster.org/forum/index.php?topic=34261.0
Hmm... I've been doing a lot of thinking about school next year. I'm going to have fun with this.
I predict that my schedule will look something like this:
Precalculus - Blubaum/Sentner
Chemistry Honors - Cummines/Kunick
AP English - Nellis (Horn)
AP American History - Chittum
French I - Weiskopf
Psychology/Sociology - Griffin
And I signed up for seventh lunch. I have to go pick up Melissa afterschool most likely.
No more ROTC... so no more wardrobe domination.
Ugh. I'm pretty sure those are the only teachers who teach that subject. Anyway....
Clubs to think about joining:
National Honor Society
Interact
French Club
I have to make up for Colorguard and Armed Drill...
I don't know why, but I don't think I'll be going to Homecoming this year. I don't have a dress, and I just don't feel like it. I'll have plenty of opportunities to go dance. Like the ROTC Holiday Dance (Nobody wears a dress for that), Military Ball (I'll need a dress for that), and JUNIOR PROM (I already have my dress for that)! *all excited* On the other hand... the Homecoming football game was the first date I had with Rich, and the dance was where we had our first kiss. It was wonderful... fireworks, stars, weak knees, the whole sha-bang. I don't know. I guess we'll see.
Does anyone know any place that is hiring? I need a job something fierce...
I cleaned out my makeup drawer... I need some new makeup. Some lipgloss, some mascara, and some black eyeliner. Maybe some eyeshadow. *raises an eyebrow* I'm allowed to wear it now that I'm sixteen. I saw this commercial on tv for eyeshadow that goes with your eyecolor. Maybe it's worth a try. Anyhoo... I'm running out of stuff to talk about. Feeling a little better...