was writing to a friend but couldn't press the "send" button...
argh!!!x_X that fu**ing ikimonogakari song is playing again...
I feel so stupid for feeling so bad right now...everyone around needs some cheer up but I can't think about anything else besides wanting to go back to Japan and feeling as if I don't belong here but have no one I could talk to about it
I tried not to think about it, tried to see the good sides of being back, tried to find a place here, tried to keep myself busy by watching dramas or sleeping but all I do is stalk you and it makes me even feel worst...i didn't even unpack yet because it hurts so much everytime I see sth and have to tell myself that it's over, that i won't go back, I won't be with you guys anymore, that you will all live on as if nothing happened, enjoy your new semester and have fun and I will miss everything...it will never be the same...
and every time I get bad news from the uni or someone reminds me that they are feeling bad it gets worst, I just wish I wasn't here and wish it could all go away, wish I could go away, far from here even though everyone seems happy to have me back...
I end up crying in the middle of nowhere cause I cannot hold the tears back, start wondering if Gantz is just fiction while waiting for the train who doesn't come...
otoke?otoke?
I feel so stupid for feeling so bad right now...everyone around needs some cheer up but I can't think about anything else besides wanting to go back to Japan and feeling as if I don't belong here but have no one I could talk to about it
I tried not to think about it, tried to see the good sides of being back, tried to find a place here, tried to keep myself busy by watching dramas or sleeping but all I do is stalk you and it makes me even feel worst...i didn't even unpack yet because it hurts so much everytime I see sth and have to tell myself that it's over, that i won't go back, I won't be with you guys anymore, that you will all live on as if nothing happened, enjoy your new semester and have fun and I will miss everything...it will never be the same...
and every time I get bad news from the uni or someone reminds me that they are feeling bad it gets worst, I just wish I wasn't here and wish it could all go away, wish I could go away, far from here even though everyone seems happy to have me back...
I end up crying in the middle of nowhere cause I cannot hold the tears back, start wondering if Gantz is just fiction while waiting for the train who doesn't come...
otoke?otoke?