Changmin's Exercise Diary- Intro
This exercise diary ADVANCED LEVEL SUPER DIFFICULT ASTROMICAL PHYSICS MATH BOOK belongs to:
The King of Win
Shim Changmin.
In which, he will recount his daily tortures at the gym learn *super* advanced ASTROMICAL physics math-like things. Duh.
~~ It would be a wise decision to keep your disturbingly soft hands off of this, Jae. I mean it. About the soft hands, I mean. It’s weird. Like… I don’t want to one-touch a guy that not only looks like a girl but feels like one, too. Seriously. And why do you smell like French Vanilla all the time? They only sell that kind of lotion in the women’s section at the- holy crap, really? Why did I bother asking? --“ DON’T TOUCH THIS OR I SINGE YOUR HAIR AS YOU SLEEP >=[ I KNOW HOW MUCH IT COSTS, JERK!!! You spend way too much time at the salon. Addictions come in many forms, Barbie. Oh, and stay away from my computer!!! Why do I keep finding your face as my desktop background? STOP IT. D: And I have hidden all of the knives and spatulas this time, my friend. There’s no way you can get me back.
I. WIN. ALREADY. ~~
~~ I see you, Junsu. No, literally- I can see you. I have cameras installed so you I can keep track of you guys 24/7. Don’t you dare come near my diary ADVANCED LEVEL SUPER DIFFICULT ASTROMICAL PHYSICS MATH BOOK or I will be forced to hold Fluffy the dolphin hostage. Ahh, you think I didn’t know about Fluffy, did you? Yeah? WELL I DO. I know you can’t sleep without that little plushie creep, and the fact that Yoochun sometimes comes into your room to- um. I’ll save that for another time.
Hehe.
…
GO AWAY, KIM!! >=[
Ah, yes. Good boy. Good. Back away slowly.
Slowly.
…
Gooooooood.
…
That color looks good on you, by the way. Thank the stylist noonas.
…
Don’t question my methods.
I don’t know how I do it, either.
… I really don’t. ~~
~~ YOOCHUN, IF YOU CRACK OPEN THIS ADVANCED LEVEL SUPER DIFF-
IF YOU OPEN THIS, JUNSU WILL KNOW WHAT YOU DO EVERY NIGHT FROM PRECISELY 2:33 AM TO 3:07 AM AS HE SLEEPS. Do you understand me? I don’t want to tell him, good God no; I get nightmares from it, okay? ME. You know what kinds of things I am openly addicted to see online, right? What you do can never compare!!
Okay, let me set this up for you:
YOOCHUN + SLEEPING JUNSU + LOW FAT YOGURT + PAPER CLIPS = Changmin crying in his sleep!!
(One question, though: why low fat? I mean you’d think that- NO! I REFUSE TO GO THERE. I refuse!)
…
Sometimes I regret setting up those cameras, Chun… But then I would have nothing to do all day and no one to blackmail. So I’ll take those nightmares, thank you.
… *shivers* ~~
~~ Jung Yunho.
If you read this (which you shouldn’t be, good Appa), then I will bypass the singeing of Jaejoong’s hair and just shave it all off in one go. Or better yet, I’ll dye his hair electric pink and let Yoochun cut it to his heart’s content. And then Sungmin will sue your Boojae for like, copyright infringement, and then the media will be in a big frenzy and then you’ll have to moonwalk your ass away from WHATEVER IT IS YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE LATELY stalking Jae? to come fix things and then you’ll be all rawwr who called forth the wrath of leader-sshi man? and I’ll be all “It was Yoochun!” and then Yoochun will be all “NU-UH you started it!” and then Junsu will be all “D: NOOO FLUFFY!” and then Jae will be all “MY HAIR J U(@U#OU@EO*U *HRU *cries*” and then you’ll be all “RAWWR WHO CALLED FORTH THE WRATH OF LEADER-SSHI MAN?” and then I’ll be all “It was-“
0.0
DON’T READ THIS!
>=[
(… but, um. Thanks and all. For, um. Helping me work out. And stuff. I appreciate it, Yunho. I do. You understand respect for another man’s privacy, right? Right. So, yeah… thanks. I owe you one.) ~~
JUNSU I SAID I’M WATCHING YOU, GET AWAY!!
God, you all are idiots.
A/N: So, bbs- YAY or NAY on the fic? ^^ This is just the intro, but I hope you all will like it~ It says it’ll be 15 chapters but that’s probably a huge lie (shorter OR longer) 0.o” LOL. Um, and EVERYTHING about this fic is so very tentative right now! ^_^ Of course, because it’s crack- I can’t… I can’t plan anything with crack. It’s impossible ^^ Hehe~
Please wait for the next chappie with patience, okay? I’ll put it up in a week few days :D You’d have to wait a week or more for the second tho ><” School is crushing meh :P
I wanna apologize to anyone reading this who has updated and i spotted your story... i won't get to reading it for a while T_T" stupid... school... >=[
P.S.: TOKYO IN A FEW DAYS, TOO! If any of you care! Which you don’t, cuz it’s not crack ^^ LOL.
If you thought:
“what DOES Yoochun do to Junsu at night…
with yogurt… and paper clips…? 0.0”
You should comment!!! XD lmao~
<333333333333
TVXQ HWAITING UNTIL THE END OF TIME!
Give up faith and they have no reason to sing.
Reason with me, yeah? HAVE FAITH.