Hit Me - Jongkey
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pairing: Jongkey
a/n: This is the first fanfic I've ever posted because I've always been to nervous so go a little easy on me ;__;
Thank you for reading, much love <3 ^^
I wrote this while listening to 'Hit me' by Shinee~
>--------------------Hit Me-------------------->
At first it was just anger that made me do it but then jealousy, fear, crushed hopes, a mixture of hateful emotions just flooded through my veins and this is what comes out of it? When you bottle feeling like that up, you end up doing something you'll regret for the rest of your life and I certainly know I'm going to regret this. I stood there, my eyes glazed over with bitterness, feeling nothing but fury.
Jonghyun lay on the ground with his hand up to his face, pure shock in his eyes that were currently frozen on the floor. I was standing over him, I had no idea if I looked like a monster or a crazy psycho who should be in a mental institute but it didn't really matter. I really hated Jonghyun.
"You fucking bastard," I hissed and stepped back. I'm sure Jonghyun could fight but he's far too passive for that, too nice for his own good and it pissed me off even more. The light from the window flooded in on him as if he was the star of a play, a tragedy, how ironic.
The shock in his eyes slowly faded and was replaced by an emotion I couldn't recognize. It was always hard to read Jonghyun, another thing I hated about him. "You," he started and swiftly swiped the blood on the corner of his mouth. Had I caused that? Damn, I guess I hit harder than I thought.
"Key! What the hell!"
Onew ran in to the room and it was pretty obvious what was going on. I could care less about Onew at this moment. I was shoved aside as Onew helped Jonghyun to his feet. Before the leader could start the questioning I gave Jonghyun, who's eyes were glued on me now, a final glower and left. Down the hall I could hear Onew's panic rich voice demanding an explanation but Jonghyun said nothing.
---
It was really awkward for the next few days, we didn't speak to each other at all and the other members were too scared to ask what was going on so they didn't. I guess they figured we would work the crinkles out like we always did but it felt so real this time. Like we wouldn't be able to fix this. Ok, who am I kidding? This is almost completely my fault.
I really regretted what I did. Completely regretted it. I wasn't thinking about anybody but myself when I hit Jonghyun that day. It wasn't just a little punch between buddies either, I meant to hurt him and I did. And not just physically.
"Hey, we're going out to eat," Minho told me from the front door, I nodded curtly. He nodded back and left. I turned the page of the new Vogue magazine in boredom and sat up. The couch was starting to feel uncomfortable too. It felt empty all of a sudden and I realized what Minho had said. So the members went to eat, eh? Ah well, a little alone time never hurts anyone.
I stood up and went to take a shower, letting the hot water sooth my skin. As refreshing as it was, I just couldn't wash away my guilt so I got out of the shower in disappointment and threw one of my black Tee's on. I ran a hand through my damp hair. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I wanted to break the mirror. All I saw was an ugly bastard. Turning away in disgust I heard a noise.
Rumble, rumble~
"Oh, you want to be fed, tum tum?"
On the way to the kitchen I stopped mid step. He was there.
Jonghyun looked like an angel, laying on the couch with his soft banes barely in his eyes as he stared up at the ceiling. His lips were pressed together, like he does when he's deep in thought and his eyelids kept fluttering closed but would open again as if he was fighting sleep. I stared at him from the doorway but I felt a little awkward and flew in to the kitchen. I suddenly didn't feel hungry anymore. Taking a swig of coke to calm my nerves, I almost tip toed back in to the living room. Ok just gotta make it over that one creaky step.... Ok just one more step, Key... Come on almost there-
"Key?"
Shit.
I stopped, no getting around this. I mentally cursed Onew because I'm sure it was his idea to leave the two of us alone to make up. That sneaky little devil. I didn't want to look at Jonghyun, he would see the loss of pride in my eyes, they were only full of shame now. Swallowing the saliva that was starting to thicken, I got just enough courage to turn around but wished I hadn't.
Jonghyun's beautiful eyes were dead on me, calculating my thoughts. Or at least that's what it felt like he was doing. You know how a lion stares at an elk? Yup, that was pretty much it.
It was the worst few minutes of my life, standing there like a complete fucking idiot with nothing to say to him. He didn't seem to want to say anything either so then why call my name?
"I hate you."
Out of everything to say, that's what I said. That is what I fucking said to him and my heart went numb when he didn't even flinch. His expression remained unreadable.
"Really?" he asked, cocking a perfectly arched brow. I really hate how beautiful he is.
"Really," I replied, every bit of hatred I tried to muster died on my tongue. Can someone please just kill me now? Put me in a coma? Anything that will get me away from here, right now, please Jesus.
The soft light hit Jonghyun's face perfectly because his face is perfect. Because Jonghyun is perfect. Staring at his face, I noticed the dark mark on his left cheek. Oh god.
It was where I hit him. I wanted to go shoot myself in the head with a shotgun right now because that was totally unacceptable. "Your face," I whispered in to the silence and he jumped slightly, absently reaching up to touch the bruise.
"Does it hurt?" I asked, but I didn't think he heard me, I was so quiet.
"A lot," he answered with hard eyes that haven't left mine since the moment I came in. I wanted to do something, touch it, caress it, kiss it but I didn't. I swallowed, trying to get rid of that burning feeling again. I really need another coke. "Ice will make the swelling go down."
"I know."
I can't take this. This silence. "It's not like I've never been punched though," Jonghyun added in that stern voice that made me quiver in ways I can't explain. Because in a way it scared me to hear such a voice from this short, pretty boy who could make anyone smile.
"I'm not going to wait forever," he suddenly said and my breath caught in my throat. Oh he must be talking about ice, he wants ice for his bruise. I rushed to the kitchen and grabbed an ice pack, returning in 15 seconds. I wasn't sure if I should throw it at him or go over there. I was afraid of what would happen if I got too close to him. Having a battle inside, my confident side won and I found myself next to him.
I looked at anything but his eyes because I knew they were dark, full of burning hatred and desire for an explanation that I didn't have. At least I wish I didn't have.
"Er," I coughed awkwardly and put the ice pack out to him, turning my head so he couldn't see my nervous expression. I waited to feel the weight from my hand be lifted but it wasn't so I looked at him in annoyance, "it's really cold you know, can you just take it so I can lea-"
Then Jonghyun grabbed my wrist and aggressively pulled me on to the couch. I yelped and struggled to get away but it was in vain when he pinned me beneath him, my arms above my head. I kept trying to get away and I was panting by the time I gave up and it made me angry when it was so easy for him to get me like this.
"Please stop," I choked and turned my head away, closing my eyes so that all of this would just disappear. But it didn't.
"No."
"Please," I was at the point of begging because I would do anything to get away from him, my heart was almost bursting out of my chest. I wasn't afraid, not at all, it was because I've always wanted this. His hands were holding my wrists softly but firmly, his legs intertwined with mine, his face mere inches from my own.
"Because you hate me so much?" he questioned and his minty breath made me feel dizzy. I tried to quiet my panting but it didn't really help the fact that my heart beat continued to race. "Right, Key? Don't you hate me? Don't you want to hurt me more than anything in the world?"
I kept my eyes shut tightly. No, no, no, no, no. Don't break under his spell, Key, don't give in. You can't tell him why you're such a jerk. He was so close to me, I really hated it. I hated that I'm the one that has to suffer through this.
"Don't you love Taemin?" I challenged back, not bothering to answer his questions. I don't know if his expression changed because I refused to open my eyes, that way I didn't have to see his clear, bright eyes that were the only thing I have ever considered truly pure and beautiful. Well, except for Jonghyun himself.
"Do I?" he wondered aloud and it killed me to hear. I wanted him to say no and deny that shit. Before he could ponder it anymore I finally spilled my heart out a little bit, "I saw you two."
A short pause. "You did?"
"Kissing."
A long pause this time and I finally opened my eyes but remained staring at the wall. Oh what pretty designs we have, Minho is really good at picking out wallpaper.
"So, that's it?"
That's it?
"That's it?" I asked on the brink of tears, "What the fuck do you mean that's it? So what, that's not a big deal to you, huh? Was it just a whim or some twisted test to decide your sexuality? Or do you fucking love him like I asked you the first time?! Fucking answer me!" I screamed, forgetting he was this close to my mouth, it must have hurt his ears. Oh well, I don't care right now.
I finally looked at him, of course my vision was blurred from the tears but I could still make out his features. He looked stunned.
"Is that why you hit me?"
"Is that why I hit you?" I asked in disbelief. Of course it was, was there any other reason? I mean it was wrong and stupid, I hated myself for it but that's what it was. Once again I struggled to get free from his grip, using more force then last time. He tightened his grip on my arms and growled. "Can't you just talk to me?!"
"Why should I?! What's there to talk about?! Just let me go, ok?! I'm sure the others are going to be home soon and you wouldn't want your precious Taemin to see you like this!"
"Will you quit with that Taemin talk!"
"Oh I'm sorry," I said sarcastically, "should I call him your Oppa? Your baby? Your boyfriend?!"
He was the one who looked angry now so I shut my mouth, I've never seen such a dark look on Jonghyun. I was panting again but this time Jonghyun was panting too, only a bit less heavily. "Are you going to listen?" he asked between breaths.
He knew I wasn't going to answer so he continued, "I'm not in love with Taemin and Taemin isn't in love with me. What you saw, that kiss, was a mistake. It just happened, I don't know how it just did. But the second it did we stopped and we both knew it didn't feel right. I really hated it. Because the only person on my mind was you. The only person who's ever on my mind is you."
My eyes widened. What did he just say...?
"See, it really made me think about stuff when you punched my lights out. I couldn't hate you no matter what. Even after that because I knew you were just upset about something, I know how you are Key. So, I went over the reasons in my head but none of them were logical, so you tell me."
All of this was too much. My mouth was going dry and my cheeks were hot. What was there to say? Ok fine, he wants the truth, I'll tell him. Before I could think about what I was saying it came out.
"I love you," I whispered, averting his gaze. I felt like breaking down. The second those words left my lips I wanted to turn back time because I know I'm screwed now. Not only could I have lost a best friend, I could lose all of my friends. Like the rambling idiot I am, I further explained.
"I love you so much, Jonghyun. I feel light headed when you're around and my heart rate rockets whenever you touch me. You're amazing and beautiful and I want to be with you all the time. Sometimes I want to hold you, so bad it hurts. And I hate it so much. I hate myself because I love you so much that I'm fighting myself inside on a daily basis-"
I took in a much needed breath and I realized I was sobbing now. "But it doesn't matter because it's not right. I try so hard to forget about you, to think of you just as a friend but it doesn't help at all. So then I tried to hate you but that obviously back fired also. Do you like seeing me this way?" I blinked through tears. I really hated crying in front of people.
"Shit, I'm really weak, right? Sorry," I tried to laugh but it just ended up being cracked and made my heart bleed more. After quieting down I gained the bravery to look at his face, despite how close it was, what could I possibly lose?
"You idiot," Jonghyun growled but his eyes were much softer.
"If you were going to tell me that I would have let you hit me 10 thousand times."
My mouth parted. Huh?
"You don't know? I'm helplessly and hopelessly in love with you. Do you think I would be that distressed over one of my band members landing a blow on me if that wasn't the case? I love you, Kim Kibum. Not anyone else, just you."
He brushed the tears away, filling my stomach with butterflies. I almost wanted to laugh at how stupid I was all this time but Jonghyun didn't give me time to regret things like that because his lips were trailing my neck now and I let out a soft moan.
"I'm sorry," I whispered but it was forgotten as he brushed his lips across my own. It was like tasting heaven, soft like clouds. "I love you," he whispered against my mouth and laced his fingers in to my hair. I felt dizzy again as his other hand trailed along my shirt lightly, burning the skin underneath.
It all felt like a dream that I wanted to last forever. He was so warm and I liked the feeling of his weight on me.
"Jonghyun," I pleaded and placed my hands on his waist gently. I didn't realize how much I wanted him and needed him until I had the chance to have him. He kissed me again and again, indicating he felt the same.
"Jonghyun," I moaned again as he kissed along my collarbone, causing sparks wherever his lips were. I reached beneath his shirt and left feathery touches along his stomach and waist. It was Jonghyun this time who moaned and he leaned down to kiss me again. This time we stayed like that, savoring the kiss.
He tasted like Ginger and Vanilla, the most amazing flavors in the universe. I let my fingers rest on his hips, tracing the hem of his jeans. My breathing was somewhat heavier and even though his kisses were subtle, sweet, and in a way innocent, it was enough to cause my entire body to get hot.
"They'll be home soon," I murmured without thinking like I always did but it didn't phase Jonghyun. He nibbled my lower lip as I pulled him even closer to me. No force alive could pull me away from this boy right now.
I'm sure my heart was going to burst out of my chest any second. And for once I didn't hate the feeling of being in love with Jonghyun. All of the pain inside of me vanished. I blushed as he buried his face in to my hair. I wrapped my arms around him, trying to catch my breath. I loved the sound of Jonghyun breathing, every breath tickling my ear.
His arms were enclosed around my waist as if he was protecting me. Without words I lay my head on his chest and closed my eyes, listening to his irregular heart beat slow down until it was even again.
We fell asleep like that, not caring if the other members found us this way later. And let me tell you, when you fall asleep in the arms of an angel, you don't care if you ever wake up.
pairing: Jongkey
a/n: This is the first fanfic I've ever posted because I've always been to nervous so go a little easy on me ;__;
Thank you for reading, much love <3 ^^
I wrote this while listening to 'Hit me' by Shinee~
>--------------------Hit Me-------------------->
At first it was just anger that made me do it but then jealousy, fear, crushed hopes, a mixture of hateful emotions just flooded through my veins and this is what comes out of it? When you bottle feeling like that up, you end up doing something you'll regret for the rest of your life and I certainly know I'm going to regret this. I stood there, my eyes glazed over with bitterness, feeling nothing but fury.
Jonghyun lay on the ground with his hand up to his face, pure shock in his eyes that were currently frozen on the floor. I was standing over him, I had no idea if I looked like a monster or a crazy psycho who should be in a mental institute but it didn't really matter. I really hated Jonghyun.
"You fucking bastard," I hissed and stepped back. I'm sure Jonghyun could fight but he's far too passive for that, too nice for his own good and it pissed me off even more. The light from the window flooded in on him as if he was the star of a play, a tragedy, how ironic.
The shock in his eyes slowly faded and was replaced by an emotion I couldn't recognize. It was always hard to read Jonghyun, another thing I hated about him. "You," he started and swiftly swiped the blood on the corner of his mouth. Had I caused that? Damn, I guess I hit harder than I thought.
"Key! What the hell!"
Onew ran in to the room and it was pretty obvious what was going on. I could care less about Onew at this moment. I was shoved aside as Onew helped Jonghyun to his feet. Before the leader could start the questioning I gave Jonghyun, who's eyes were glued on me now, a final glower and left. Down the hall I could hear Onew's panic rich voice demanding an explanation but Jonghyun said nothing.
---
It was really awkward for the next few days, we didn't speak to each other at all and the other members were too scared to ask what was going on so they didn't. I guess they figured we would work the crinkles out like we always did but it felt so real this time. Like we wouldn't be able to fix this. Ok, who am I kidding? This is almost completely my fault.
I really regretted what I did. Completely regretted it. I wasn't thinking about anybody but myself when I hit Jonghyun that day. It wasn't just a little punch between buddies either, I meant to hurt him and I did. And not just physically.
"Hey, we're going out to eat," Minho told me from the front door, I nodded curtly. He nodded back and left. I turned the page of the new Vogue magazine in boredom and sat up. The couch was starting to feel uncomfortable too. It felt empty all of a sudden and I realized what Minho had said. So the members went to eat, eh? Ah well, a little alone time never hurts anyone.
I stood up and went to take a shower, letting the hot water sooth my skin. As refreshing as it was, I just couldn't wash away my guilt so I got out of the shower in disappointment and threw one of my black Tee's on. I ran a hand through my damp hair. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I wanted to break the mirror. All I saw was an ugly bastard. Turning away in disgust I heard a noise.
Rumble, rumble~
"Oh, you want to be fed, tum tum?"
On the way to the kitchen I stopped mid step. He was there.
Jonghyun looked like an angel, laying on the couch with his soft banes barely in his eyes as he stared up at the ceiling. His lips were pressed together, like he does when he's deep in thought and his eyelids kept fluttering closed but would open again as if he was fighting sleep. I stared at him from the doorway but I felt a little awkward and flew in to the kitchen. I suddenly didn't feel hungry anymore. Taking a swig of coke to calm my nerves, I almost tip toed back in to the living room. Ok just gotta make it over that one creaky step.... Ok just one more step, Key... Come on almost there-
"Key?"
Shit.
I stopped, no getting around this. I mentally cursed Onew because I'm sure it was his idea to leave the two of us alone to make up. That sneaky little devil. I didn't want to look at Jonghyun, he would see the loss of pride in my eyes, they were only full of shame now. Swallowing the saliva that was starting to thicken, I got just enough courage to turn around but wished I hadn't.
Jonghyun's beautiful eyes were dead on me, calculating my thoughts. Or at least that's what it felt like he was doing. You know how a lion stares at an elk? Yup, that was pretty much it.
It was the worst few minutes of my life, standing there like a complete fucking idiot with nothing to say to him. He didn't seem to want to say anything either so then why call my name?
"I hate you."
Out of everything to say, that's what I said. That is what I fucking said to him and my heart went numb when he didn't even flinch. His expression remained unreadable.
"Really?" he asked, cocking a perfectly arched brow. I really hate how beautiful he is.
"Really," I replied, every bit of hatred I tried to muster died on my tongue. Can someone please just kill me now? Put me in a coma? Anything that will get me away from here, right now, please Jesus.
The soft light hit Jonghyun's face perfectly because his face is perfect. Because Jonghyun is perfect. Staring at his face, I noticed the dark mark on his left cheek. Oh god.
It was where I hit him. I wanted to go shoot myself in the head with a shotgun right now because that was totally unacceptable. "Your face," I whispered in to the silence and he jumped slightly, absently reaching up to touch the bruise.
"Does it hurt?" I asked, but I didn't think he heard me, I was so quiet.
"A lot," he answered with hard eyes that haven't left mine since the moment I came in. I wanted to do something, touch it, caress it, kiss it but I didn't. I swallowed, trying to get rid of that burning feeling again. I really need another coke. "Ice will make the swelling go down."
"I know."
I can't take this. This silence. "It's not like I've never been punched though," Jonghyun added in that stern voice that made me quiver in ways I can't explain. Because in a way it scared me to hear such a voice from this short, pretty boy who could make anyone smile.
"I'm not going to wait forever," he suddenly said and my breath caught in my throat. Oh he must be talking about ice, he wants ice for his bruise. I rushed to the kitchen and grabbed an ice pack, returning in 15 seconds. I wasn't sure if I should throw it at him or go over there. I was afraid of what would happen if I got too close to him. Having a battle inside, my confident side won and I found myself next to him.
I looked at anything but his eyes because I knew they were dark, full of burning hatred and desire for an explanation that I didn't have. At least I wish I didn't have.
"Er," I coughed awkwardly and put the ice pack out to him, turning my head so he couldn't see my nervous expression. I waited to feel the weight from my hand be lifted but it wasn't so I looked at him in annoyance, "it's really cold you know, can you just take it so I can lea-"
Then Jonghyun grabbed my wrist and aggressively pulled me on to the couch. I yelped and struggled to get away but it was in vain when he pinned me beneath him, my arms above my head. I kept trying to get away and I was panting by the time I gave up and it made me angry when it was so easy for him to get me like this.
"Please stop," I choked and turned my head away, closing my eyes so that all of this would just disappear. But it didn't.
"No."
"Please," I was at the point of begging because I would do anything to get away from him, my heart was almost bursting out of my chest. I wasn't afraid, not at all, it was because I've always wanted this. His hands were holding my wrists softly but firmly, his legs intertwined with mine, his face mere inches from my own.
"Because you hate me so much?" he questioned and his minty breath made me feel dizzy. I tried to quiet my panting but it didn't really help the fact that my heart beat continued to race. "Right, Key? Don't you hate me? Don't you want to hurt me more than anything in the world?"
I kept my eyes shut tightly. No, no, no, no, no. Don't break under his spell, Key, don't give in. You can't tell him why you're such a jerk. He was so close to me, I really hated it. I hated that I'm the one that has to suffer through this.
"Don't you love Taemin?" I challenged back, not bothering to answer his questions. I don't know if his expression changed because I refused to open my eyes, that way I didn't have to see his clear, bright eyes that were the only thing I have ever considered truly pure and beautiful. Well, except for Jonghyun himself.
"Do I?" he wondered aloud and it killed me to hear. I wanted him to say no and deny that shit. Before he could ponder it anymore I finally spilled my heart out a little bit, "I saw you two."
A short pause. "You did?"
"Kissing."
A long pause this time and I finally opened my eyes but remained staring at the wall. Oh what pretty designs we have, Minho is really good at picking out wallpaper.
"So, that's it?"
That's it?
"That's it?" I asked on the brink of tears, "What the fuck do you mean that's it? So what, that's not a big deal to you, huh? Was it just a whim or some twisted test to decide your sexuality? Or do you fucking love him like I asked you the first time?! Fucking answer me!" I screamed, forgetting he was this close to my mouth, it must have hurt his ears. Oh well, I don't care right now.
I finally looked at him, of course my vision was blurred from the tears but I could still make out his features. He looked stunned.
"Is that why you hit me?"
"Is that why I hit you?" I asked in disbelief. Of course it was, was there any other reason? I mean it was wrong and stupid, I hated myself for it but that's what it was. Once again I struggled to get free from his grip, using more force then last time. He tightened his grip on my arms and growled. "Can't you just talk to me?!"
"Why should I?! What's there to talk about?! Just let me go, ok?! I'm sure the others are going to be home soon and you wouldn't want your precious Taemin to see you like this!"
"Will you quit with that Taemin talk!"
"Oh I'm sorry," I said sarcastically, "should I call him your Oppa? Your baby? Your boyfriend?!"
He was the one who looked angry now so I shut my mouth, I've never seen such a dark look on Jonghyun. I was panting again but this time Jonghyun was panting too, only a bit less heavily. "Are you going to listen?" he asked between breaths.
He knew I wasn't going to answer so he continued, "I'm not in love with Taemin and Taemin isn't in love with me. What you saw, that kiss, was a mistake. It just happened, I don't know how it just did. But the second it did we stopped and we both knew it didn't feel right. I really hated it. Because the only person on my mind was you. The only person who's ever on my mind is you."
My eyes widened. What did he just say...?
"See, it really made me think about stuff when you punched my lights out. I couldn't hate you no matter what. Even after that because I knew you were just upset about something, I know how you are Key. So, I went over the reasons in my head but none of them were logical, so you tell me."
All of this was too much. My mouth was going dry and my cheeks were hot. What was there to say? Ok fine, he wants the truth, I'll tell him. Before I could think about what I was saying it came out.
"I love you," I whispered, averting his gaze. I felt like breaking down. The second those words left my lips I wanted to turn back time because I know I'm screwed now. Not only could I have lost a best friend, I could lose all of my friends. Like the rambling idiot I am, I further explained.
"I love you so much, Jonghyun. I feel light headed when you're around and my heart rate rockets whenever you touch me. You're amazing and beautiful and I want to be with you all the time. Sometimes I want to hold you, so bad it hurts. And I hate it so much. I hate myself because I love you so much that I'm fighting myself inside on a daily basis-"
I took in a much needed breath and I realized I was sobbing now. "But it doesn't matter because it's not right. I try so hard to forget about you, to think of you just as a friend but it doesn't help at all. So then I tried to hate you but that obviously back fired also. Do you like seeing me this way?" I blinked through tears. I really hated crying in front of people.
"Shit, I'm really weak, right? Sorry," I tried to laugh but it just ended up being cracked and made my heart bleed more. After quieting down I gained the bravery to look at his face, despite how close it was, what could I possibly lose?
"You idiot," Jonghyun growled but his eyes were much softer.
"If you were going to tell me that I would have let you hit me 10 thousand times."
My mouth parted. Huh?
"You don't know? I'm helplessly and hopelessly in love with you. Do you think I would be that distressed over one of my band members landing a blow on me if that wasn't the case? I love you, Kim Kibum. Not anyone else, just you."
He brushed the tears away, filling my stomach with butterflies. I almost wanted to laugh at how stupid I was all this time but Jonghyun didn't give me time to regret things like that because his lips were trailing my neck now and I let out a soft moan.
"I'm sorry," I whispered but it was forgotten as he brushed his lips across my own. It was like tasting heaven, soft like clouds. "I love you," he whispered against my mouth and laced his fingers in to my hair. I felt dizzy again as his other hand trailed along my shirt lightly, burning the skin underneath.
It all felt like a dream that I wanted to last forever. He was so warm and I liked the feeling of his weight on me.
"Jonghyun," I pleaded and placed my hands on his waist gently. I didn't realize how much I wanted him and needed him until I had the chance to have him. He kissed me again and again, indicating he felt the same.
"Jonghyun," I moaned again as he kissed along my collarbone, causing sparks wherever his lips were. I reached beneath his shirt and left feathery touches along his stomach and waist. It was Jonghyun this time who moaned and he leaned down to kiss me again. This time we stayed like that, savoring the kiss.
He tasted like Ginger and Vanilla, the most amazing flavors in the universe. I let my fingers rest on his hips, tracing the hem of his jeans. My breathing was somewhat heavier and even though his kisses were subtle, sweet, and in a way innocent, it was enough to cause my entire body to get hot.
"They'll be home soon," I murmured without thinking like I always did but it didn't phase Jonghyun. He nibbled my lower lip as I pulled him even closer to me. No force alive could pull me away from this boy right now.
I'm sure my heart was going to burst out of my chest any second. And for once I didn't hate the feeling of being in love with Jonghyun. All of the pain inside of me vanished. I blushed as he buried his face in to my hair. I wrapped my arms around him, trying to catch my breath. I loved the sound of Jonghyun breathing, every breath tickling my ear.
His arms were enclosed around my waist as if he was protecting me. Without words I lay my head on his chest and closed my eyes, listening to his irregular heart beat slow down until it was even again.
We fell asleep like that, not caring if the other members found us this way later. And let me tell you, when you fall asleep in the arms of an angel, you don't care if you ever wake up.