(no subject)
well here i am still alive, just. heart still beating, just.
been jamming with kath all night. time to turn in though, both got shit to do ommorow, she got work n i got dole scum stuff to do. she is helping me turn some of my prose into songs so they can be played to some kinda audiance, whether they end up being mates at [arties, or in a band, or just at open mike who knows. they are bound to go somewhere :)
feeling less lost now, starting to get my feet back on the ground, still got loads on the brain but i kinda hope it all goes away. my new start in life is just beginging. mising loads of people, lots and lots. feeling very distant to some nd very close to others. all a bit odd y'know. still dont know where my head is at which aint that much fun but the mood swings are starting to go away and the sleep is coming back and the control of myself is getting stronger day by day and generally feeling better bout myeself, so thats definately a good thing :).
i guess it all kinda comes together in the end. and been thinking alot about fate recently, but dont worry, i havent succumbed to its charms yet, still playing by ear but trying to maintain a laissz fare attitude. what will be will be let it get on with itself kinda thing. i cant change anything. so its a case of whether i wait for the world to move on without me or do i run ahead and let it catch up. i dont know.
one thing i do know is i know i want to be in a certain place with certain comapany who would feel a certain way about me. but i don think that is possible. lost interest n all that i dont know. i aint lost interest. and thats for sure. just wish i had handled things better and made better choices. but cant undo anything just hope for the best for the future. which is what im gonna do. who knows where this is going (life not this blog post) but itll be interesting finding out i guess.
whatever i guess
peak to yall soon
J
been jamming with kath all night. time to turn in though, both got shit to do ommorow, she got work n i got dole scum stuff to do. she is helping me turn some of my prose into songs so they can be played to some kinda audiance, whether they end up being mates at [arties, or in a band, or just at open mike who knows. they are bound to go somewhere :)
feeling less lost now, starting to get my feet back on the ground, still got loads on the brain but i kinda hope it all goes away. my new start in life is just beginging. mising loads of people, lots and lots. feeling very distant to some nd very close to others. all a bit odd y'know. still dont know where my head is at which aint that much fun but the mood swings are starting to go away and the sleep is coming back and the control of myself is getting stronger day by day and generally feeling better bout myeself, so thats definately a good thing :).
i guess it all kinda comes together in the end. and been thinking alot about fate recently, but dont worry, i havent succumbed to its charms yet, still playing by ear but trying to maintain a laissz fare attitude. what will be will be let it get on with itself kinda thing. i cant change anything. so its a case of whether i wait for the world to move on without me or do i run ahead and let it catch up. i dont know.
one thing i do know is i know i want to be in a certain place with certain comapany who would feel a certain way about me. but i don think that is possible. lost interest n all that i dont know. i aint lost interest. and thats for sure. just wish i had handled things better and made better choices. but cant undo anything just hope for the best for the future. which is what im gonna do. who knows where this is going (life not this blog post) but itll be interesting finding out i guess.
whatever i guess
peak to yall soon
J