Realization
So, I know this is an online journal so I'm going to make this post for everyone to see. I am me and if you don't like it then don't interact with me.
Recently had a breakthrough with my therapist. We figured out that I HAD (past tense because I will be damned if I don't overcome it) a need for physical affection, intimacy in other words. Didn't have to be sexual, but it usually turned out that I sacrificed my happiness and desires just to get that affection. Well not anymore. I'm putting my foot down.
Also, that because of this I settle for a guy that is "good enough" just so I can get what I want. I deserve better.
On that note, I met someone and we've only been on one date so far, but i have a good feeling about this one and I think that he is worth writing about. Great conversation, made me feel special, paid for the meal (which I am totally not used to since I USED to date losers), didn't try to be all typical male (looking at me like a piece of meat), talked about our futures. It was so crazy, we agreed on pretty much everything. That never happens. No kiss, which normally would bother me, but it felt like i had made progress in not needing affection. He's intelligent, funny, handsome, kind, and determined. There's nothing about him so far that I really dislike.
The date happened yesterday, 1/27/13 at Chili's around 9pm. I wore black turtleneck, leopard print skirt, closed toed platform black heels (suede), hair half up half down, pearl earrings, red nails. He wore a blue and white vertical striped button down with khaki shorts. He had 4 yingling beers and I had 2 long islands. I had the sirloin and the chocolate molten (free!), he had quesadillas with guac. He paid :] so that was nice. We talked until roughly 2am. Talked about family, past relationships, future plans, and he even brought up his concern about graduation dates and such. All in all, a date to remember. Thats why I felt the need to write it down. I saved the to go cup that I got, because i just can't help the fact that I have a good feeling about this one.
An architect and an engineer. Lets hope things continue on the up and up. He posted a status that stated "omg ur real." It really made me wonder if it was about me, basically meaning this good hunch is mutual. Or it could be totally unrelated and mean nothing significant. This is when I realized I should stop reading into things like that. It doesn't lead anywhere positive.
I need to just enjoy everyday in itself and thats it. :] be patient and hopefully good things will come.
Recently had a breakthrough with my therapist. We figured out that I HAD (past tense because I will be damned if I don't overcome it) a need for physical affection, intimacy in other words. Didn't have to be sexual, but it usually turned out that I sacrificed my happiness and desires just to get that affection. Well not anymore. I'm putting my foot down.
Also, that because of this I settle for a guy that is "good enough" just so I can get what I want. I deserve better.
On that note, I met someone and we've only been on one date so far, but i have a good feeling about this one and I think that he is worth writing about. Great conversation, made me feel special, paid for the meal (which I am totally not used to since I USED to date losers), didn't try to be all typical male (looking at me like a piece of meat), talked about our futures. It was so crazy, we agreed on pretty much everything. That never happens. No kiss, which normally would bother me, but it felt like i had made progress in not needing affection. He's intelligent, funny, handsome, kind, and determined. There's nothing about him so far that I really dislike.
The date happened yesterday, 1/27/13 at Chili's around 9pm. I wore black turtleneck, leopard print skirt, closed toed platform black heels (suede), hair half up half down, pearl earrings, red nails. He wore a blue and white vertical striped button down with khaki shorts. He had 4 yingling beers and I had 2 long islands. I had the sirloin and the chocolate molten (free!), he had quesadillas with guac. He paid :] so that was nice. We talked until roughly 2am. Talked about family, past relationships, future plans, and he even brought up his concern about graduation dates and such. All in all, a date to remember. Thats why I felt the need to write it down. I saved the to go cup that I got, because i just can't help the fact that I have a good feeling about this one.
An architect and an engineer. Lets hope things continue on the up and up. He posted a status that stated "omg ur real." It really made me wonder if it was about me, basically meaning this good hunch is mutual. Or it could be totally unrelated and mean nothing significant. This is when I realized I should stop reading into things like that. It doesn't lead anywhere positive.
I need to just enjoy everyday in itself and thats it. :] be patient and hopefully good things will come.