(no subject)
i havent written in this thing in soo long.. well same old shit different day is pretty much how its been... ive come to the conclusion that without alcohol in my life i feel depressed, lonely, sad, and i dont seem to understand anything... DONT FEEL BAD THOUGH.. b/c i hate when people write in these things looking for sympothy.. for me its ----to vent----.. i had this conversation with tim the other day but i thought i would put it out there for everyone else to think about and maybe have an actual answer for me!
i really dont understand how guys/girls can use people.. leading a person on is the worst thing in the world.. you either like them and want to be with them or you dont! if you would rather not have a relationship with them then dont lead them on.. or "do shit" with them! it only makes the person feel completly like shit when they find out the truth.. i mean when you do that and say things to a person dont you have feelings for them? wouldnt you feel bad knowing your just going to break their heart purposly? i guess i will never understand.. i have so many feelings that like inside of me i dont know what to do with.. its like now i cant trust people.. i have to be careful.. i need to actually be proven to that i can believe someone.. like i just dont get it.. when you have feelings for someone and someone has feelings for you.. whats so wrong with being together or whats so bad about telling them that you just cant be with them instead of egging the whole relationship on? well whatever i guess its just the same old shit.. is it better to have loved and lost? or to never have loved at all?
so yeah i guess im out peace.. i'll put pictures up later i dont feel like doing it now..
Jessica<3