shoe stimulation
Is it possible for shoestrings to be defective? What would be the grounds for returning them or filing a claim? Indeed, they are still strings of equal length with no strays or frayed edges. I should add they are actually one string, wound through a series of punched holes reaching the top in unison, grasping arms in harmony and protecting the foot by safely sealing the canvas of the shoe at the ankle. I’m only having a problem with the left shoelaces. You’d think they’d learn from watching the other how simple their job is. Unfortunately, the left foot rebels and demands much of my attention. Each time I bend down to tie them in a pretty bow I swear it will be the last. I try pulling the bow taught to one side and even tucking in the excess lace into the crevasse between my sock and shoe. I try the double-bow method and use as much of the remaining material in the tie itself. Still I get nothing. No reward of stability. I swear I’ll die tying. The time has come to rest this hectic exercise and either give it one hell of a knot and force the shoe to become a permanent slipper or break down and suck up having to have that new laces look. Whatever the cost, I’m not giving up these shoes. They’re my favorite tattered pre-worn converse that I scored in Manila and they’ve already taken me everywhere. Oh, What it’s like to walk in another man’s shoes. From airport to airport to airport we go, my shoes and I, and with a comfortable bounce we are able to bypass the stresses that one usually finds in connecting terminals, especially when those said flights are running behind. With these shoes I find my stride. With these shoes I thee glide. With these laces however, I’m losing my mind. I wonder if my right leg is actually stepping on the laces of the left and untying them, but looking down all the time, concentrating on the converse, kind of defeats the purpose of the carefree casual stroll. With that said, I realize it is my right side pulling on the left. I never noticed how clumsy I tend to walk. Does my right foot just love the other so much that it constantly brushes up against it in some kind of erotic foot fetish activity? Is my subconscious revealing to me just how much I love myself? Is one leg shorter than the other? My mind is frantic with questions all of a sudden. Perhaps the nerves in my feet are the end of the line from what starts in my brain… I need a pedicure.