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Leader. They need one. They have to look for one, what's wrong with him, he's always . . . he always knows what to . . .
He doesn't know what to do. Too small, his head, Wally's head, he can't think can't be leader can't shape his mind right, where is he in it, spilling out. Strong webbed hands and lungs that breathe in air and water like there's no difference and he is marvelous, fantastic, fantastic what a thing, the kind of person he'd travel centuries to see-
Centuries.
Where is his watch?
Real names. Secret names. A boy with dark glasses, a title, a real name behind it whisperwhisper this is who I really am.
No real name to give back.
No room for it.
Android. Life. Not-life, copy-life, learning lifepowers as it sees them, changing without growing no will to call its own. But a marvelous thing, marvelous and it hurts to destroy it, it hurts to see the arrow, it hurts to be followed by people who are gone bad wolf. New people. Clever people, clevercruel but not that cruel, so clever. Bad Wolf the blonde hair, the sparking eyes, the little smirk but it's not right it's not his girl and he-
Drowns.
He drowns. Slip and fall and drop in the pool, he drowns, he drowns and he almost remembers and if he just-if he just concentrates-
Green arms pull him out, pretty green, Martian-green, Martian lips, eyes full of stars and a soft heart.
Red hair.
He breathes and it's his girl's name, but that's not the girl looking down at him and that's not his real name she's saying.
Watch. Where is his watch.
Where is his . . .
The old man has a watch. The old man has a watch, the old man looks inside it, the old man's memories are inside it, the old man's girl is inside it. His girl. His girl from when he was . . . when he was different.
When he was a doctor with a secret name.
Long time ago. Lifetimes-I was a different man back then.
“Souvenir!” he says when he takes the helmet that shoved him down, that replaced even him, but he takes the watch too, why does he want the watch? He likes watches. Time. He likes time, he cheats time and magic, hah, there's no such thing as magic this is how you break it down, the rhythm of the universe, you can access the energy of it with this and that and a little twist, the right numbers, the right word at the right time in the right place-
He takes the watch too.
He's got this watch, this fob watch that's the same as yours. Same writing, same everything.
The watch.
Where is his watch?
And what about now? Can he see it now?
Clay. Man of clay. Man used to be a man, made of clay like rocks, used to be a woman but now she's rocks and oh, oh, he hadn't wanted to do that, hadn't wanted his girl to have to-to have to do that but if they. If they hadn't, then. Then . . .
They never live. Why do they never live? Just once, they . . . just once can't they all live? Like Christmas, the winter, the bombs coming down and no, not German. British. Not German. All fixed, all better, just hold on. Wars end. Every war ends. Even. Even the ones your students go off and die in. Even the ones you send them off to die in, didn't know better stupid small human didn't know what was coming. Didn't know.
Have you enjoyed it, D-
Stars go off in Wally's head, the memory falls apart. All the memories, and then just six months of them, and in the back of his child-head he is roaring, he is not this he is not this small he cannot be contained like this he is space and time and the heart and soul of stars and where is my WATCH?!
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This time she doesn't.
Not his girl. Not his watch.
He doesn't think he'll ever stop drowning.
Missions. Children on missions, child soldiers, covert ops, men in dark cowls and bright capes and they are so, so very good at it child soldiers but they don't kill, humans are so clever and wonderful and they break his hearts. Heart. Hearts? Tricks up their sleeves in their minds in their bodies little things and tricks and things, computers hidden in gloves and changing faces and lungs that breathe air and water and. And.
Time to run again? Love the running, yeah?
It's always time to run.
He just . . .
Wally's head is so small, and even if it weren't he's still never, ever been fast enough.
Not really.
“KID FLASH!”
Down he goes, bleeding like a human and isn't that funny, he thinks, except Wally's mind is too small for that thought, Wally's mind is terrified. Black gloves are clutching at him, putting pressure on the wound, and everyone else is fighting and he's supposed to be so much more clever than this, than getting shot, than. Than.
Her. She stepped in the way she took it she-
All those things you've been ready to die for, I thought for a moment you'd finally found something worth living for.
“My watch,” he mutters, ignoring the pain of the black-gloved hands pressing down, wishing he had it. Even if he could only hold it, even if nothing else-he wants his watch. He wants his girls. He wants-he wants-
He wants enough space to remember his name.
“KF! KF, don't close your eyes!” Little black-gloved hands, human hands, such a clever mind and clever tongue and he would have loved to take this human, this one, this boy, they would've been . . . they would've been amazing together.
They have been amazing, he thinks belatedly. Here on this one little planet, this beautifulterrible Earth, always a favorite, always coming back, never tiring of it, not really, never bored of it, too wonderful to ever be bored of.
Of course this is the place he would die, he thinks.
This is the only place he was ever going to die.
“WALLY!” someone screams.
“Doctor,” someone breathes, and he thinks about his watch and his girls and how stupid of him, so closed up and small, how did he ever forget-
Big arms around him, a bigger gloved hand against the bullet wound, a desperate, pained grin.
His boy.
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“Let go of him!” Robin snaps, a protective curl around his other side, and Wally's hand grabs the other's arm to keep him from lashing out.
“Jack,” he says. His boy. How did he ever forget his boy?
“The watch, Doctor,” Jack stresses, and he does not really look older but he is, a little, a lifetime, a lion's share, he is older and immortal and. And. And Wally's head throbs, does not have room, is so small and human and not immortal at all. “Come on, focus, you can't die on me now, do you have any idea how many unsavory people I had to get through to find you? Let me tell you I will not be looking in any mirrors anytime soon and as for boomerangs, well, we're not even going there. Although, heh, gotta say, the music was just my style.”
He laughs at that. Jack. Jack.
“Doctor, the watch.”
“I never had the watch,” he breathes, Wally breathes, the person beneath Wally and the lost lives beneath that person breathe. Both of them breathe, all of them, nurses and nuns and women so unmoved by their own beauty and girls without names and soldiers who don't kill and do kill and you're a clever one, quiet in the library, he'd liked her, she was brave, there was a little girl and terrible things in the air look me up and his name . . . what was his name?
He had a name. She'd told him his name. She'd . . .
“No no no, Wally, keep your eyes open, Wally.”
“Doctor, don't do this to me, there's no one else left.”
. . . no one? But if there's no one . . . the box, and the watch, and his girls, they . . . they all . . .
Have you enjoyed it, Doctor? Being human? Has it taught you wonderful things? Has it made you better? Richer? Wiser?
Yes.
Of course.
“WALLY!”
“Hello, Dad.”
Something bursts into bloom inside of him at the sound of that voice, inside his head, maybe even it's really him inside his head for the first time in such a long time because that voice, of every possible voice . . .
“Who-” Jack starts sharply, Robin starts sharper, and that cheeky girlish laugh so familiar even though it was so long ago, but he doesn't forget, he never forgets.
“What's all this, then?” she cuts him off, his girl, his Jenny, his Jenny grinning down at him with closed lips and a face that's just the same as the first one. “So dramatic! What a show! But of course you've been making a show of it, saving worlds, rescuing civilizations, defeating terrible creatures-really, I expected nothing less, surprised you haven't gone and started a new renaissance or somesuch. No idea what you're lollygagging about down there for, though.”
“Jenny,” he rasps, chokes out; all of him chokes out. He clutches at leather military gloves, black boy-soldier gloves, his own bloody chest, and she's still grinning.
Jenny lifts her hand, and his watch gleams dull and glorious between his girl's fingers.
“Don't you know we've got an awful lot of running to do?”
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*shakes fist at the two missing seasons that I assume is the reason why I don't understand everything yet but*
Omigosh Omigosh Omigosh! *bounces* *offers you all the cookies, love, internet, and hugs in the world*
This this is brilliant! I might not get everything (damnit! Why did I have to watch the seasons out of order and why must school stop me from knowing all that is wonderful who-universe). But this is brilliant!
Oh Wally! *squishes* I'm too excited to even give a proper feedback. *bounces around* *squee*
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Good job! ^_^
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What episode is it? O_o
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THIS TOTALLY MAKES SENSE.
EVERYTHING.
RUNNING!
SOUVENIRS!
HIS GIRLS. RED HEADS!
IT'S PERFECT!
Oh, man. Now I have a thread in my head that tells me Wally is the Doctor. XD At least he's finally ginger?
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I think this proves we're total nerds. Yep.
OH, Seito- can I call you Seito?- that was amazing. The layers and disappointment when Megan didn't see, and the way he just latches onto Iris as his girl, and how he'd take Rob with him, and Roy won't come and the comment on Kaldur and OH GOD JACK! AND JENNY! JENNY!!!
*hugs anon* This is the greatest thing ever. EVER!!
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Me? *confused*
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