STEP; Chapter 0
A rather dispirited boy in dishevelled clothing sits on the floor. He leans against the wall and laughs. Somewhere over his head is a small and narrow telescope. The scenery on the other side of the lens is one no photographer could resist; towering cliffs against a beautiful blue sky. However, the lens does not focus on this, instead it zooms in on the inconspicuous patches of mud and weed in between the rocks. The patches are dotted with nails.
Beside the cliff stands a boy who tirelessly tinkers with the nails; testing their different placements and the distances between them. The birds flying across the sky chirp at this regular visitor in a sign of respect. The sun casts its light on the boy's forehead and the wind caresses his cheeks, eagerly showing the beauty of nature andlife. A bead of sweat trails down his forehead. Exhausted, and with nails still in his hand, he takes two steps back and looks at the cliff side riddled with holes.
The boy sitting on the floor leans his head back against the wall and bursts out laughing. His voice might have been somewhat hoarse, but then again, who would know? After some time passes---though how long no one really cares---he begins to feel tired so he stops laughing and the room falls silent again.
"Idiot," he closes his eyes, "Why are you still hitting the nails?"
He laughs softly, a single tear slides down his cheek and, together with the key in his hand, falls quietly onto the floor.
[17.03.2013]
On a beautiful, relaxing day in March, you might hope that God brings something new and exciting into your life, such as a great love affair or an encounter with a past lover. These stories can only take place in certain settings; you wouldn't fantasize about running into your past lover at a stock exchange, and the princes and princesses of happily-ever-after fairy tales would most likely not appear on the boat in the story of the Old Man and the Sea. On this day, Luhan whistles a tune and opens the mailbox while glancing at the sunny skies. It's a nice day for outdoor activities, he thinks.
Holding a stack of letters, Luhan reads them as he heads upstairs into his room, closing the door behind him as he steps in. He looks up and sees two heads close together in front of the computer, he throws two letters onto one of the beds.
"I brought your letters up." He stands in the middle of the room, looking carefully at this month's phone bill.
"Lord Lu* is becoming more and more considerate and cute." The person standing in front of the computer says without turning around. His left hand rests on the shoulder of the one who is sitting down. A smile plays at the corners of his mouth.
"Didn't you apply to move into our room?" Luhan eyes the two people beside him and continues to look over his phone bill.
"Your room's too small," a disdainful voice drifts over.
"The living room's big," the person sitting down says suddenly, and he even smiles "Let's move there together?" Luhan, exasperated yet used to this, just shakes his head.
Getting up from his seat, Kris flops over onto Luhan’s bed and starts opening his letters one by one. Luhan kicks him, “You better get off now,” Kris looks calm as ever, eyes still trained on the letter, “There are plenty of germs on your bed, one more won’t hurt.”
Luhan jumps up angrily and throws a flurry of mock punches and kicks at Kris. Yixing seizes his chance and joins Kris. With an expression that is quite clearly challenging the limits of Luhan’s tolerance, he falls sideways onto Luhan's bed..
Luhan, with no choice but to retreat to Kris’s bed, keeps his shoes on as an act of revenge. The two sitting on his bed stare at him and after a while Luhan kicks his shoes off, no longer able to stand it himself. Kris and Yixing explode in laughter.
“If you’re feeling really uncomfortable, you can wash my sheets for me,” Kris waves his laundry card. Unable to stand their mockery any longer, Luhan storms over to the computer desk and begins to surf the net.
Kris is still holding on to the envelopes, the first letter seems be a regular bill from the bank, and he only glances at the number at the bottom before tossing it on the bed. The second letter is a flyer, and Kris squints as he sounds out each word in broken Korean, “Rock Climbing Association, the best way to embark on a healthy lifestyle.”
“How do they know you’re not healthy?” Yixing asks, the corners of his mouth curving upwards.
.
“Who knows, maybe it’s because I’m too handsome.” Kris gets up to stand by the window, one hand at his side, the other adjusting his collar.
“Oh? Then they shouldn’t have sent it to you, it should be mine,” Luhan snatches the flyer from Kris, printed on it is a beautiful mountain scenery, "They probably decided that you're unhealthy based on other aspects of your character,” Luhan says as he reads the introduction expressionlessly.
Kris glances at Yixing, “I think it’ll be around two days before he recovers.”
“Or not,” Yixing says, going on to explain the severity of the situation, “He needs two days if one person lies on his bed for one minute or less. Just now there were two people, and we haven’t gotten up yet.”
"And you're still not getting up,” Kris says, chuckling.
"I'm covering for you, aren't I?" Yixing also breaks out into laughter.
Just then, Tao kicks open the front door on their floor with his long legs. “We finally have a break and the weather is perfect. Yet you guys are still in here...” he says, letting himself in to Kris and Luhan’s room only to see two people lying on Luhan's bed and Luhan surfing the net as if nothing was wrong. “How obscene," the words on the tip of his tongue escaping from his lips.
Luhan nods in agreement, and then shakes his head to show his disapproval.
"So what if we are, don't you want to join?" Kris drawls, voice accompanied by Yixing's mock-innocent laughter.
"Please go engage in your dirty sexual acts on your own bed," Luhan mutters, eyes still glued to the computer screen.
“Duizhang, I’m going to go crazy.” Unable to stand their childish antics, Tao shakes his head and walks over to Kris, dragging him away.
“What are you doing,” Kris fixes his shirt, “this outfit is expensive okay.”
“Please, that shirt? You cut it however you want when you go on shows! You only act like it’s expensive in front of me,” Tao grumbles, disdain evident in his face. “Come shopping with me.”
Kris turns and kicks Yixing, while his other hand reaches out to nudge Luhan, “Together?”
“Forget it, we’ll cause chaos," Yixing sighs as he stands up, “but with the two of us our popularity will multiply and we won’t be able to come back.”
Rendered speechless, Kris casts a questioning glance at Luhan but the boy only waves the flyer still in his hand and winks at them, "I hope you guys have the time of your lives.”
Tao shakes his head resignedly, “There’s no hope for the two of you. Is there even one normal human being in our group’s China line?”
“I wish you the best in finding the person of your dreams in our Korea line,” Luhan drags his mouse downwards, “but you should prepare yourself, there aren’t many normal ones there either.”
“Oh come on, Sehun is pretty normal,” Yixing grins and pats Luhan on the back. His eyes meet Luhan’s squinted ones as the other slowly turns his head. Luhan pinches Yixing’s face before turning back to the computer.
“No one is as normal as you. You’re the epitome of normal.” he says.
“Let’s go.” Kris says, after finally being done with fixing his hair in the mirror. He grabs a couple of necklaces form the nightstand and puts them on, then picks up his bag and pushes Tao forward.
“You guys really aren’t coming?” Kris asks, turning to look at the two one more time.
Luhan waves his hand and Yixing replies languidly, "I want to play guitar."
Kris raises his eyebrows, “Play it for me when I come back.”
“There’s a proverb* that perfectly describes this scene right now,” Luhan snickers, still staring at the computer screen.
Kris blanks out for two seconds before realizing what Luhan means. He reaches out to grab Luhan and perhaps teach him a lesson but Tao tows him towards door with all his strength, “Will you guys ever stop?”
“I’ll kick your ass when I get back!” Kris grins and points at Luhan’s back.
“God you’re always saying that, maybe one day you should actually kick someone’s ass and show us!” Tao drags Kris out the door and it closes with a bang behind them.
“Oh hey, two days ago an anonymous sender sent me a new camera,” Luhan says holding his beloved purple Samsung camera. On the phone screen is a picture of the Bukhan Mountain and the detailed directions to it that came up after he entered the flyer's website into the address bar. Beside the picture of the great mountain is a small map and a line of text that reads "A photographer's heaven". Luhan looks at Yixing mischievously and Yixing pretends to be shocked, slowly turning to try to retreat to his own room.
It's too late, however, because Luhan follows him, “Yixing, you’re becoming more and more handsome,” He beams and his eyes crinkle around the corners.
"You finally realized, I also think that you are becoming more and more beautiful,” Yixing lowers his head and tunes his guitar, “So when’s the wedding?”
Luhan’s smile does not fade, “That won’t do, what will happen to the tens of thousands of young girls waiting for us? I can’t possibly do this to them.”
“It’s okay, Kris already sacrificed himself for the greater good, so you should consider making me part of that ‘greater good’,” Yixing replies smoothly.
Luhan suddenly blows in his ear and Yixing quickly curls up like a wimp.
"I don't think you'll be able to handle it. Now come see the mountain with me!" Luhan glares.
“No, you’re scared of heights and I don’t want you to throw up all over me.” Yixing shakes his head firmly.
“It’s not like we’re going to the top of the cliff, I just want to test out my new camera.” Luhan begs.
“Have mercy on me, oh great one," Yixing pleads, "We finally have a day off..."
"Are you a true brother or not!" Luhan shoves him.
Yixing presses his face against his guitar, "You're exaggerating it again..."
Luhan beams, "Get used to it." He says and kicks Yixing, "What about Jongdae? Should we leave the door open for him?"
“He sprained his ankle and went to Joonmyun's place to get medicine so he should have a key." The battery-dead phone on the table next to them beeps as the screen fades to black.
“Charge it for me.” Yixing continues to play his guitar.
Shaking his head, Luhan goes to plug the charger in, “Fine, order me around.” He looks at the pure white Lenovo---very similar to his own white iPhone---and exclaims, “You’re so lucky, your fans actually bought you the one you wanted.”
“I get pretty worried when I get this kind of gift though, if the company finds out they'll yell at me again," Yixing shakes his head, "It was sent directly to my house and the package didn't have a return address so I can’t return it even if I wanted to!”
The phone lights up and Luhan tries to key in 1007 but gets prompted with an error message.
“The password isn’t your birthdate?” Luhan turns to ask.
Yixing stands up and takes the phone from Luhan, “Birthdates are way too easy to crack, especially with people like you around," He pauses and looks up, “I’m using the original password. No one knows what it is.”
Luhan raised his eyebrows, “So many people use their birthdates though. Chanyeol, Sehun, me...besides no one wants to look at your phone anyway. It's not like there are any nude photos.”
“There are a few of you, I took them while you were sleeping,” Yixing replies calmly, eyes still on the phone.
“What did you say?” Luhan glares at him and tries to steal the phone away.
“You had some very elegant sleeping positions,” Yixing turns to the side to keep the phone away from Luhan’s clutches, “I’ll sell them when you become famous.”
Luhan points an indignant finger at Yixing and cries, “As if I’m scared of you! Next time we go to a hotel I'll take photos of you from head to toe.”
“That’s different,” Yixing shakes his head, “You’re going to be more popular than me, so I’ll make more money.”
Luhan is at a complete loss for words and only manages to say, “What are you talking about?”
“Okay, okay,” Yixing pushes Luhan lightly, “do you want to go see the mountain or not?”
----
“What kind of damned place is this...” Yixing grumbles as he uses both his hands and feet to push himself up a slope that can’t even be called a ‘trail’, “This isn’t a developed tourist attraction at all...” He takes a look at the flyer and the map in his hand and then looks up at the trail ahead. At this point, he can go neither up nor down.
"How much farther?" He yells at Luhan, who is already far ahead.
“Almost there, I can already see the top!” Luhan continues climbing at a rapid pace, “It’s only fun if the trail hasn’t been developed yet! Hurry up!” He turns to wave at Yixing.
“My shoes are new,” dejected, Yixing looks at his mud-covered shoes.
Luhan, already at the end of the trail, seems unable to close his mouth as he takes in the magnificent view of the towering cliff face against the backdrop of the vast, endless forest. "Hurry up idiot!" Luhan looks as if he wants to reach out and grab Yixing but he doesn't, "It's beautiful!" He exclaims and takes out his camera, beginning to take pictures.
It's a really carefree feeling, free from all crowds and noise with only three colors before them - blue, green and white. Luhan lies on a rock, hands outstretched and Yixing sits beside him, taking snacks out from his bag one by one.
"I just realized that you would make a really great street vendor."
Luhan giggles as he looks at Yixing only to be met with a glare.
“Go ahead, laugh,” Yixing says with his head hung low, “build your happiness on the humiliation you’ve brought upon me.”
“Humiliating you isn’t enough to make me happy, but if you’re willing to transfer me all the money you earn, I might be content for awhile.”
Luhan crosses his arms and looks at the 'street vendor' in front of him.
“It really doesn’t take much for you to be happy,” Yixing rips open a bag of snacks, “if you exchange that money to Chinese yuan, maybe that would be worth getting excited over."
“Ah, I'm satisfied easily," Luhan sighs as he stands, patting Yixing on the head, he walks toward the rock wall close by, "I'm learning from you; you wore a fake pearl bracelet all these years like it's a treasure. Such a simple outlook on money and life."
Yixing disagrees, "So what if it's fake?" He tugs at the beads on his wrist, “I wore these when I was hurt pretty badly, and afterwards I got a lot better, then we had our debut and got an award...”
Luhan walks over and stares intently at the prayer beads -- they were quite ordinary, really. “If it’s that powerful lend it to me for a few days, I have a soccer match with the others next week and the stakes are pretty high.”
Yixing is somewhat taken aback, he takes off the bracelet, "Don't lose it."
"Don't tell me you believe in Buddha now," Luhan laughs as he puts it on.
Yixing shoots him a dubious look, "Do I look like I do?”
Luhan pushes himself up on his elbows and studies him carefully, “A little.”
.
“Would Buddhists dance without stopping everyday?” Yixing’s shoulders sag.
“You become a statue when you get off the stage,” Luhan chuckles.
“You don’t move on stage and you move non-stop when you get off the stage...” Yixing eyes Luhan, “There aren’t many people as special as you.”
“Che,” Luhan playfully hits Yixing again, gaze now fixed on the ground beside the rock wall, “Hey idiot, what do you think is up with that red arrow?”
Around 30 meters away from them, a red arrow on the ground is pointing at a rock wall. Yixing gets to his feet and walks over, and he sees that beside the arrow lies a small hammer and nail.
Luhan crouches down and picks up the hammer and nail to inspect them, then his gaze travels over to the arrow again, “maybe it’s for rock climbing?”
“With no foothold anywhere?” Yixing squints, a hand in front of his face to protect himself from the sun’s harsh glare.
“That’s what the nail is for!” Luhan sits on the floor, enlightened, and stares at the nail in his hand, “but this nail looks a bit too small.” He picks up the small hammer, finds a crevice and pushes aside some dirt with his bare hands.
“What are you trying to do?” Yixing crouches down beside Luhan and stares at him incredulously, “Don’t tell me you want to rock-climb.”
“I’m just trying to see how rock climbers get the nails into the rock," Luhan raises a curious brow.
Yixing looks down at the arrow beneath his feet, then looks up at Luhan who is now trying to drive the nail into the rock wall, “Someone like you who's so passionate about everything new should really go be a scientist, not sing and dance--” before he can finish speaking, he feels Luhan leaning on his shoulder, and he turns to look at him, baffled.
He fell asleep.
His breathing is steady and his mouth is slightly open. Yixing stares at him, dumbfounded and momentarily at a loss for words. This sudden change from being full of energy one moment to sleeping soundly the next is really quite difficult for him to accept.
[1 Minute Ago]
“With no foothold anywhere?” Yixing’s disbelieving voice sounds beside him, and Luhan is confused for a few seconds before he suddenly understands.
“That’s what the nail is for!” He looks at the nail in his hand, “but this nail looks a bit too small.” As he speaks, he picks up the small hammer, finds a crevice, and starts hitting the nail.
“What are you trying to do?” Yixing joins him, “Don’t tell me you want to rock-climb.”
“I’m just trying to see how rock climbers get the nails into the rock,” Luhan continues to hit the nail while Yixing grumbles beside him, “Someone like you who's so passionate about everything new should really go be a scientist, not sing and dance--”
Suddenly the familiar music from their album fills his ears, it’s dark all around, and in front of him are a jumble of signs and noise. There’s a mic by his mouth, Yixing is standing to the front-left of him and Kris is standing to his front-right. He seems to be in the center of the stage, and their title song is blasting - it’s his part.
Luhan freezes, and turns around. However, the booming music does not stop.
“Luhan!” Tao, who is standing to his left, yells, “dance!”
Luhan looks to his other side, and Jongdae and Minseok are both staring at him, bewildered. Kris seems to have felt something, and turns his head slightly. He's shocked when he sees Luhan standing there with his back facing the audience, not moving, and he exchanges a look with Yixing who also just sees this and is equally surprised.
Luhan’s part is over quickly, and EXO-K joins them from the side of the stage. Jongin stands in the center of the formation while Yixing and Sehun quickly scurry to the sides. Luhan, still shocked and lost in the group, is quickly dragged by Kris to a spot somewhere behind Sehun. “Wake up!” Kris shouts in a voice Luhan can hear, using Chinese.
A clear rhythm starts after a brief moment of silence, and in the middle of the dark stage, the spotlight is focused on Jongin, Yixing, and Sehun. When the rhythm starts, everyone else remains motionless as they begin to dance.
Luhan breathes heavily as he takes in everything happening before him, and amidst the rhythm he instinctively knows what he has to do, the next eighth beat is his, he knows, this is all very strange, but...
The music that belongs to him sounds, and as Kris is staring at him nervously, he begins to dance without missing a beat.
The all-too-familiar moves, the all-too-familiar positions; he doesn't know where he is, he doesn't know what day it is, he doesn't know what happened, but once the music starts he follows along as if this is what he is meant to do.
He has to finish this performance because this is what he always does.
Once the song ends, the lights fade and everyone tries to catch their breath in the dark but they don’t high-five each other like they usually do. Jongin, hair plastered with sweat and still out of breath walks over to Luhan, “What happened?” Chanyeol pulls him back but is pushed aside, “Don’t you know how important this performance is?”
“Talk backstage,” Joonmyun growls and pushes Jongin offstage. Everyone's expressions are all rather unpleasant; Sehun shoots Luhan a look and Baekhyun wordlessly pats off the golden powder still stuck in his hair. Luhan stands there, pale and dumbfounded as everyone quickly walks past him. Kris is staring at the ground with hands on his hips, and Yixing throws an arm around Luhan's shoulder and helps him offstage.
"Good work." "Good work." The greetings waiting for them backstage are devoid of emotions, and other SM artists are hurrying around the makeup room and waiting room. The MC'svoice travels from the stage; the next performance will begin soon.
The manager is holding the telephone and bowing deeply to no one in particular, “Yes, yes, I know, this has never happened before, I will, I will...” He glanced up at the members now filing in, “I will ask him, of course. I apologize.”
Luhan’s face is pale and he has a painful headache as he tries with all his might to think back and make sense of something but the manager already hung up the phone and is walking towards him.
“What happened out there!” The manager comes up to Luhan and hits him over the head, and Luhan stumbles backwards, “Are you trying to ruin this for us!” The manager yells at him, and the other artists in the waiting room all turn around to see what’s going on. Luhan keeps his head down and remains silent, and slowly---through the pain---he suddenly feels that this room is familiar to him.
"This is live broadcast! Do you understand, live broadcast! Our company's artists aren't the only ones who perform at the music awards! A group needs 10 years to gain recognition, and only one day to ruin it all! If we win this award, do you want everyone to say we don't deserve it?” The manager continues to shout at Luhan, but Luhan slowly raises his head, his face ashen.
“Music awards?” He turns around to look at everyone, “Newcomer awards? But didn’t we already win...”
The room falls silent.
The manager stares at him blankly, then lifts his hand and slaps him hard across the face.
Luhan feels a faint buzzing in his ears as he stares at the floor, head knocked violently to one side. This really is a familiar waiting room, that performance earlier was also a familiar stage, it feels as if he’s already experienced everything before, but yet---it’s not entirely the same.
Kris pulls a stunned Luhan behind himself, "If we win the award, I will explain and apologize when I give my speech.”
“Explain?! How can you explain this?” The manager stares at Kris as if he’s out of his mind.
Kris pauses before continuing, “I’ll say that he‘s too drained so he's beginning to hallucinate.”
“Are you trying to say that the company mistreats the idols?” The manager accuses him.
“Then...” Kris thinks, “I’ll say that he dropped his mic.”
The manager retorts, “Mic problems happen often. Have you seen anyone space out completely the way he did?"
Kris looks the manager in the eye, "then I won't explain; I'll just apologize.”
The manager looks back and forth between Kris and Luhan, then at the staff members and makeup artists waving and signalling him over, “You guys go fix your makeup first, then sit in the pre-decided order in the audience. If you get an award later, you two leaders handle it. Your attitude must be sincere, enough so that no one is able to question you," Suho and Kris nod and bow towards him, and he turns to Luhan, “As for you, we’ll settle this later!”
Seeing that they've finished talking, the makeup artists rush forward to fix the makeup for all twelve of them. Unlike before where the boys would all try to talk at the same time, everyone is unusually quiet. Jongin looks at Baekhyun, who is putting on his eyeliner again, out of the corner of his eye, and Luhan is staring at the ceiling, thick foundation covering the fresh fingerprints on his cheek.
They arrive in the dark venue and quietly take their seats, but still cannot avoid the fans’ eagle eyes and end up causing a huge commotion. Joonmyun passes a message from one side to the other -- that if they receive an award later, they will bow on stage together for 10 full seconds.
“I read in the newspaper once that severe exhaustion can make people forget things," Tao stares at Luhan who is sitting far away between Chanyeol and Baekhyun, and whispers to Kris, "It's called temporary memory loss or something."
Kris looks in Luhan's direction and suddenly there is a small uproar among the fans; as it turns out, upon his request Yixing switched seats with Baekhyun and is now sitting beside Luhan.
"Luhan-ge! Its okay! We~ love~ you~!!" the fans discuss this briefly before chanting it in unison. Luhan hesitates, then wordlessly turns around and bows to the fans.
"Ah~~" A loud scream sounds from the back.
"That's possible," Kris agrees, "He's been taking sleeping pills now for the past few days, so he's probably not feeling very well."
"What?" Tao stares at Kris disbelievingly, "He has insomnia? I can't tell at all."
Kris glances at Tao calmly, "You fall asleep the quickest so of course you can't tell."
Tao is taken aback for a few seconds then turns to looks at Kris, "Don't tell me that when we share a room at the hotel, after I fall asleep you’re still suffering from insomnia?”
“Pay attention to the performance,” Kris says, and he plasters a smile on his face then proceeds to clap for the performance on stage to which he paid absolutely no attention.
Even though they already prepared themselves for it, when their name is announced for the rookie award Yixing is still so excited that he feels the urge to cry. The entire group rises from their seats and hug each other; Joonmyun stares at an equally touched Kris, eyes red, “You’ve worked hard.” he says as the two hug and pat each other on the shoulder. This scene is captured by excited fans one the side and goes on to circulate online and become one of the most heart-warming pictures of EXO at the award show.
Another picture that is more widely circulated is the picture taken when, after Luhan bows in apology, the entire group bows together for ten whole seconds. The caption of the picture is even more moving, "One person's mistake, twelve people's apology."
In the car on the way back, Luhan feels as if his head is about to explode. He grabs Yixing’s hand and asks anxiously, “What day is it today?”
Yixing stares at him, “the 29th.”
“December 29th, 2012?” Luhan murmurs with a frown.
Yixing nods silently.
Luhan looks out the window at the snow-covered streets quickly flashing by and asks, “Did you go mountain hiking with me recently? And we hit nails into the rock walls together...”
Yixing looks at him, grabs his shoulder and pulls him to his side, “Close your eyes and sleep for a while. You’re too tired.”
Head resting on Yixing’s shoulder, Luhan closes his eyes and tries to find a logical explanation for himself
He’s too tired, he spaced out when he was on stage and imagined a three month period in between. Daydreaming, he kept daydreaming on stage; he confused dreams with reality. It’s a side-effect of the sleeping pills; he developed a mental problem, he needs to get treated.
“Yixing, what’s the schedule for tomorrow?” he asks.
“A magazine shoot tomorrow afternoon, and a TV program in the evening,” Yixing replies.
“Then tomorrow morning, take me to the hospital,” Luhan says tiredly.
Yixing turns and looks at Luhan.
He fell asleep.
[1 Minute Ago]
“Close your eyes and sleep for a while. You’re too tired.” Yixing’s voice sounds by his ear.
Luhan rests his head on Yixing's shoulder, and closes his eyes as he tries to find a logical explanation for himself.
He’s too tired, he spaced out when he was on stage, and imagines a three month period in between; daydreaming, he kept daydreaming on stage; he confused dream with reality, it’s a side-effect of the sleeping pills; he developed a mental problem, he needs to get treated.
“Yixing, what’s the schedule for tomorrow?” he asks.
“A magazine shoot tomorrow afternoon, and a tv program in the evening,” Yixing replies.
“Then tomorrow morning, take me to the hospital,” Luhan says tiredly.
“Hm? Okay?” Luhan frowns and opens his eyes, and the harsh outdoor light forces him to cover his eyes. He suddenly feels as if he's lost his balance, his hands and feet lose their support and he falls hard on a smooth white surface.
When he is finally able to open his eyes completely, he doesn’t see Yixing beside him nor the car in front of him. There’s a red arrow on the ground, and the arrow is pointing towards a door.
Luhan stumbles to his feet and looks around him; this white surface seems to be a wide corridor, and behind him is what appears to be an endless mass of bright light. He stumbles forward in the direction the arrow points him in, and when he reaches the door he notices that to the left of the arrow there is a small door, however that is not what the arrow is pointing at.
His mind completely blank, Luhan stands in front of the door and hesitates for a moment. He knocks.
There's a sound of a key opening a lock, and after two seconds the door opens. A man with a wide grin opens the door, and gestures for him to come in.
“You’re finally here,” he says.
---
*Lord Lu: 鹿爷 (Lu ye), a common nickname for Luhan among Chinese fans.
*Proverb: 对牛弹琴 literally translates into playing music to a bull, means that you're trying to explain an intricate concept to a fool who won't understand anyway. This is a play on Kris's nickname, 牛仔哥 (denim brother).
Beside the cliff stands a boy who tirelessly tinkers with the nails; testing their different placements and the distances between them. The birds flying across the sky chirp at this regular visitor in a sign of respect. The sun casts its light on the boy's forehead and the wind caresses his cheeks, eagerly showing the beauty of nature andlife. A bead of sweat trails down his forehead. Exhausted, and with nails still in his hand, he takes two steps back and looks at the cliff side riddled with holes.
The boy sitting on the floor leans his head back against the wall and bursts out laughing. His voice might have been somewhat hoarse, but then again, who would know? After some time passes---though how long no one really cares---he begins to feel tired so he stops laughing and the room falls silent again.
"Idiot," he closes his eyes, "Why are you still hitting the nails?"
He laughs softly, a single tear slides down his cheek and, together with the key in his hand, falls quietly onto the floor.
[17.03.2013]
On a beautiful, relaxing day in March, you might hope that God brings something new and exciting into your life, such as a great love affair or an encounter with a past lover. These stories can only take place in certain settings; you wouldn't fantasize about running into your past lover at a stock exchange, and the princes and princesses of happily-ever-after fairy tales would most likely not appear on the boat in the story of the Old Man and the Sea. On this day, Luhan whistles a tune and opens the mailbox while glancing at the sunny skies. It's a nice day for outdoor activities, he thinks.
Holding a stack of letters, Luhan reads them as he heads upstairs into his room, closing the door behind him as he steps in. He looks up and sees two heads close together in front of the computer, he throws two letters onto one of the beds.
"I brought your letters up." He stands in the middle of the room, looking carefully at this month's phone bill.
"Lord Lu* is becoming more and more considerate and cute." The person standing in front of the computer says without turning around. His left hand rests on the shoulder of the one who is sitting down. A smile plays at the corners of his mouth.
"Didn't you apply to move into our room?" Luhan eyes the two people beside him and continues to look over his phone bill.
"Your room's too small," a disdainful voice drifts over.
"The living room's big," the person sitting down says suddenly, and he even smiles "Let's move there together?" Luhan, exasperated yet used to this, just shakes his head.
Getting up from his seat, Kris flops over onto Luhan’s bed and starts opening his letters one by one. Luhan kicks him, “You better get off now,” Kris looks calm as ever, eyes still trained on the letter, “There are plenty of germs on your bed, one more won’t hurt.”
Luhan jumps up angrily and throws a flurry of mock punches and kicks at Kris. Yixing seizes his chance and joins Kris. With an expression that is quite clearly challenging the limits of Luhan’s tolerance, he falls sideways onto Luhan's bed..
Luhan, with no choice but to retreat to Kris’s bed, keeps his shoes on as an act of revenge. The two sitting on his bed stare at him and after a while Luhan kicks his shoes off, no longer able to stand it himself. Kris and Yixing explode in laughter.
“If you’re feeling really uncomfortable, you can wash my sheets for me,” Kris waves his laundry card. Unable to stand their mockery any longer, Luhan storms over to the computer desk and begins to surf the net.
Kris is still holding on to the envelopes, the first letter seems be a regular bill from the bank, and he only glances at the number at the bottom before tossing it on the bed. The second letter is a flyer, and Kris squints as he sounds out each word in broken Korean, “Rock Climbing Association, the best way to embark on a healthy lifestyle.”
“How do they know you’re not healthy?” Yixing asks, the corners of his mouth curving upwards.
.
“Who knows, maybe it’s because I’m too handsome.” Kris gets up to stand by the window, one hand at his side, the other adjusting his collar.
“Oh? Then they shouldn’t have sent it to you, it should be mine,” Luhan snatches the flyer from Kris, printed on it is a beautiful mountain scenery, "They probably decided that you're unhealthy based on other aspects of your character,” Luhan says as he reads the introduction expressionlessly.
Kris glances at Yixing, “I think it’ll be around two days before he recovers.”
“Or not,” Yixing says, going on to explain the severity of the situation, “He needs two days if one person lies on his bed for one minute or less. Just now there were two people, and we haven’t gotten up yet.”
"And you're still not getting up,” Kris says, chuckling.
"I'm covering for you, aren't I?" Yixing also breaks out into laughter.
Just then, Tao kicks open the front door on their floor with his long legs. “We finally have a break and the weather is perfect. Yet you guys are still in here...” he says, letting himself in to Kris and Luhan’s room only to see two people lying on Luhan's bed and Luhan surfing the net as if nothing was wrong. “How obscene," the words on the tip of his tongue escaping from his lips.
Luhan nods in agreement, and then shakes his head to show his disapproval.
"So what if we are, don't you want to join?" Kris drawls, voice accompanied by Yixing's mock-innocent laughter.
"Please go engage in your dirty sexual acts on your own bed," Luhan mutters, eyes still glued to the computer screen.
“Duizhang, I’m going to go crazy.” Unable to stand their childish antics, Tao shakes his head and walks over to Kris, dragging him away.
“What are you doing,” Kris fixes his shirt, “this outfit is expensive okay.”
“Please, that shirt? You cut it however you want when you go on shows! You only act like it’s expensive in front of me,” Tao grumbles, disdain evident in his face. “Come shopping with me.”
Kris turns and kicks Yixing, while his other hand reaches out to nudge Luhan, “Together?”
“Forget it, we’ll cause chaos," Yixing sighs as he stands up, “but with the two of us our popularity will multiply and we won’t be able to come back.”
Rendered speechless, Kris casts a questioning glance at Luhan but the boy only waves the flyer still in his hand and winks at them, "I hope you guys have the time of your lives.”
Tao shakes his head resignedly, “There’s no hope for the two of you. Is there even one normal human being in our group’s China line?”
“I wish you the best in finding the person of your dreams in our Korea line,” Luhan drags his mouse downwards, “but you should prepare yourself, there aren’t many normal ones there either.”
“Oh come on, Sehun is pretty normal,” Yixing grins and pats Luhan on the back. His eyes meet Luhan’s squinted ones as the other slowly turns his head. Luhan pinches Yixing’s face before turning back to the computer.
“No one is as normal as you. You’re the epitome of normal.” he says.
“Let’s go.” Kris says, after finally being done with fixing his hair in the mirror. He grabs a couple of necklaces form the nightstand and puts them on, then picks up his bag and pushes Tao forward.
“You guys really aren’t coming?” Kris asks, turning to look at the two one more time.
Luhan waves his hand and Yixing replies languidly, "I want to play guitar."
Kris raises his eyebrows, “Play it for me when I come back.”
“There’s a proverb* that perfectly describes this scene right now,” Luhan snickers, still staring at the computer screen.
Kris blanks out for two seconds before realizing what Luhan means. He reaches out to grab Luhan and perhaps teach him a lesson but Tao tows him towards door with all his strength, “Will you guys ever stop?”
“I’ll kick your ass when I get back!” Kris grins and points at Luhan’s back.
“God you’re always saying that, maybe one day you should actually kick someone’s ass and show us!” Tao drags Kris out the door and it closes with a bang behind them.
“Oh hey, two days ago an anonymous sender sent me a new camera,” Luhan says holding his beloved purple Samsung camera. On the phone screen is a picture of the Bukhan Mountain and the detailed directions to it that came up after he entered the flyer's website into the address bar. Beside the picture of the great mountain is a small map and a line of text that reads "A photographer's heaven". Luhan looks at Yixing mischievously and Yixing pretends to be shocked, slowly turning to try to retreat to his own room.
It's too late, however, because Luhan follows him, “Yixing, you’re becoming more and more handsome,” He beams and his eyes crinkle around the corners.
"You finally realized, I also think that you are becoming more and more beautiful,” Yixing lowers his head and tunes his guitar, “So when’s the wedding?”
Luhan’s smile does not fade, “That won’t do, what will happen to the tens of thousands of young girls waiting for us? I can’t possibly do this to them.”
“It’s okay, Kris already sacrificed himself for the greater good, so you should consider making me part of that ‘greater good’,” Yixing replies smoothly.
Luhan suddenly blows in his ear and Yixing quickly curls up like a wimp.
"I don't think you'll be able to handle it. Now come see the mountain with me!" Luhan glares.
“No, you’re scared of heights and I don’t want you to throw up all over me.” Yixing shakes his head firmly.
“It’s not like we’re going to the top of the cliff, I just want to test out my new camera.” Luhan begs.
“Have mercy on me, oh great one," Yixing pleads, "We finally have a day off..."
"Are you a true brother or not!" Luhan shoves him.
Yixing presses his face against his guitar, "You're exaggerating it again..."
Luhan beams, "Get used to it." He says and kicks Yixing, "What about Jongdae? Should we leave the door open for him?"
“He sprained his ankle and went to Joonmyun's place to get medicine so he should have a key." The battery-dead phone on the table next to them beeps as the screen fades to black.
“Charge it for me.” Yixing continues to play his guitar.
Shaking his head, Luhan goes to plug the charger in, “Fine, order me around.” He looks at the pure white Lenovo---very similar to his own white iPhone---and exclaims, “You’re so lucky, your fans actually bought you the one you wanted.”
“I get pretty worried when I get this kind of gift though, if the company finds out they'll yell at me again," Yixing shakes his head, "It was sent directly to my house and the package didn't have a return address so I can’t return it even if I wanted to!”
The phone lights up and Luhan tries to key in 1007 but gets prompted with an error message.
“The password isn’t your birthdate?” Luhan turns to ask.
Yixing stands up and takes the phone from Luhan, “Birthdates are way too easy to crack, especially with people like you around," He pauses and looks up, “I’m using the original password. No one knows what it is.”
Luhan raised his eyebrows, “So many people use their birthdates though. Chanyeol, Sehun, me...besides no one wants to look at your phone anyway. It's not like there are any nude photos.”
“There are a few of you, I took them while you were sleeping,” Yixing replies calmly, eyes still on the phone.
“What did you say?” Luhan glares at him and tries to steal the phone away.
“You had some very elegant sleeping positions,” Yixing turns to the side to keep the phone away from Luhan’s clutches, “I’ll sell them when you become famous.”
Luhan points an indignant finger at Yixing and cries, “As if I’m scared of you! Next time we go to a hotel I'll take photos of you from head to toe.”
“That’s different,” Yixing shakes his head, “You’re going to be more popular than me, so I’ll make more money.”
Luhan is at a complete loss for words and only manages to say, “What are you talking about?”
“Okay, okay,” Yixing pushes Luhan lightly, “do you want to go see the mountain or not?”
----
“What kind of damned place is this...” Yixing grumbles as he uses both his hands and feet to push himself up a slope that can’t even be called a ‘trail’, “This isn’t a developed tourist attraction at all...” He takes a look at the flyer and the map in his hand and then looks up at the trail ahead. At this point, he can go neither up nor down.
"How much farther?" He yells at Luhan, who is already far ahead.
“Almost there, I can already see the top!” Luhan continues climbing at a rapid pace, “It’s only fun if the trail hasn’t been developed yet! Hurry up!” He turns to wave at Yixing.
“My shoes are new,” dejected, Yixing looks at his mud-covered shoes.
Luhan, already at the end of the trail, seems unable to close his mouth as he takes in the magnificent view of the towering cliff face against the backdrop of the vast, endless forest. "Hurry up idiot!" Luhan looks as if he wants to reach out and grab Yixing but he doesn't, "It's beautiful!" He exclaims and takes out his camera, beginning to take pictures.
It's a really carefree feeling, free from all crowds and noise with only three colors before them - blue, green and white. Luhan lies on a rock, hands outstretched and Yixing sits beside him, taking snacks out from his bag one by one.
"I just realized that you would make a really great street vendor."
Luhan giggles as he looks at Yixing only to be met with a glare.
“Go ahead, laugh,” Yixing says with his head hung low, “build your happiness on the humiliation you’ve brought upon me.”
“Humiliating you isn’t enough to make me happy, but if you’re willing to transfer me all the money you earn, I might be content for awhile.”
Luhan crosses his arms and looks at the 'street vendor' in front of him.
“It really doesn’t take much for you to be happy,” Yixing rips open a bag of snacks, “if you exchange that money to Chinese yuan, maybe that would be worth getting excited over."
“Ah, I'm satisfied easily," Luhan sighs as he stands, patting Yixing on the head, he walks toward the rock wall close by, "I'm learning from you; you wore a fake pearl bracelet all these years like it's a treasure. Such a simple outlook on money and life."
Yixing disagrees, "So what if it's fake?" He tugs at the beads on his wrist, “I wore these when I was hurt pretty badly, and afterwards I got a lot better, then we had our debut and got an award...”
Luhan walks over and stares intently at the prayer beads -- they were quite ordinary, really. “If it’s that powerful lend it to me for a few days, I have a soccer match with the others next week and the stakes are pretty high.”
Yixing is somewhat taken aback, he takes off the bracelet, "Don't lose it."
"Don't tell me you believe in Buddha now," Luhan laughs as he puts it on.
Yixing shoots him a dubious look, "Do I look like I do?”
Luhan pushes himself up on his elbows and studies him carefully, “A little.”
.
“Would Buddhists dance without stopping everyday?” Yixing’s shoulders sag.
“You become a statue when you get off the stage,” Luhan chuckles.
“You don’t move on stage and you move non-stop when you get off the stage...” Yixing eyes Luhan, “There aren’t many people as special as you.”
“Che,” Luhan playfully hits Yixing again, gaze now fixed on the ground beside the rock wall, “Hey idiot, what do you think is up with that red arrow?”
Around 30 meters away from them, a red arrow on the ground is pointing at a rock wall. Yixing gets to his feet and walks over, and he sees that beside the arrow lies a small hammer and nail.
Luhan crouches down and picks up the hammer and nail to inspect them, then his gaze travels over to the arrow again, “maybe it’s for rock climbing?”
“With no foothold anywhere?” Yixing squints, a hand in front of his face to protect himself from the sun’s harsh glare.
“That’s what the nail is for!” Luhan sits on the floor, enlightened, and stares at the nail in his hand, “but this nail looks a bit too small.” He picks up the small hammer, finds a crevice and pushes aside some dirt with his bare hands.
“What are you trying to do?” Yixing crouches down beside Luhan and stares at him incredulously, “Don’t tell me you want to rock-climb.”
“I’m just trying to see how rock climbers get the nails into the rock," Luhan raises a curious brow.
Yixing looks down at the arrow beneath his feet, then looks up at Luhan who is now trying to drive the nail into the rock wall, “Someone like you who's so passionate about everything new should really go be a scientist, not sing and dance--” before he can finish speaking, he feels Luhan leaning on his shoulder, and he turns to look at him, baffled.
He fell asleep.
His breathing is steady and his mouth is slightly open. Yixing stares at him, dumbfounded and momentarily at a loss for words. This sudden change from being full of energy one moment to sleeping soundly the next is really quite difficult for him to accept.
[1 Minute Ago]
“With no foothold anywhere?” Yixing’s disbelieving voice sounds beside him, and Luhan is confused for a few seconds before he suddenly understands.
“That’s what the nail is for!” He looks at the nail in his hand, “but this nail looks a bit too small.” As he speaks, he picks up the small hammer, finds a crevice, and starts hitting the nail.
“What are you trying to do?” Yixing joins him, “Don’t tell me you want to rock-climb.”
“I’m just trying to see how rock climbers get the nails into the rock,” Luhan continues to hit the nail while Yixing grumbles beside him, “Someone like you who's so passionate about everything new should really go be a scientist, not sing and dance--”
Suddenly the familiar music from their album fills his ears, it’s dark all around, and in front of him are a jumble of signs and noise. There’s a mic by his mouth, Yixing is standing to the front-left of him and Kris is standing to his front-right. He seems to be in the center of the stage, and their title song is blasting - it’s his part.
Luhan freezes, and turns around. However, the booming music does not stop.
“Luhan!” Tao, who is standing to his left, yells, “dance!”
Luhan looks to his other side, and Jongdae and Minseok are both staring at him, bewildered. Kris seems to have felt something, and turns his head slightly. He's shocked when he sees Luhan standing there with his back facing the audience, not moving, and he exchanges a look with Yixing who also just sees this and is equally surprised.
Luhan’s part is over quickly, and EXO-K joins them from the side of the stage. Jongin stands in the center of the formation while Yixing and Sehun quickly scurry to the sides. Luhan, still shocked and lost in the group, is quickly dragged by Kris to a spot somewhere behind Sehun. “Wake up!” Kris shouts in a voice Luhan can hear, using Chinese.
A clear rhythm starts after a brief moment of silence, and in the middle of the dark stage, the spotlight is focused on Jongin, Yixing, and Sehun. When the rhythm starts, everyone else remains motionless as they begin to dance.
Luhan breathes heavily as he takes in everything happening before him, and amidst the rhythm he instinctively knows what he has to do, the next eighth beat is his, he knows, this is all very strange, but...
The music that belongs to him sounds, and as Kris is staring at him nervously, he begins to dance without missing a beat.
The all-too-familiar moves, the all-too-familiar positions; he doesn't know where he is, he doesn't know what day it is, he doesn't know what happened, but once the music starts he follows along as if this is what he is meant to do.
He has to finish this performance because this is what he always does.
Once the song ends, the lights fade and everyone tries to catch their breath in the dark but they don’t high-five each other like they usually do. Jongin, hair plastered with sweat and still out of breath walks over to Luhan, “What happened?” Chanyeol pulls him back but is pushed aside, “Don’t you know how important this performance is?”
“Talk backstage,” Joonmyun growls and pushes Jongin offstage. Everyone's expressions are all rather unpleasant; Sehun shoots Luhan a look and Baekhyun wordlessly pats off the golden powder still stuck in his hair. Luhan stands there, pale and dumbfounded as everyone quickly walks past him. Kris is staring at the ground with hands on his hips, and Yixing throws an arm around Luhan's shoulder and helps him offstage.
"Good work." "Good work." The greetings waiting for them backstage are devoid of emotions, and other SM artists are hurrying around the makeup room and waiting room. The MC'svoice travels from the stage; the next performance will begin soon.
The manager is holding the telephone and bowing deeply to no one in particular, “Yes, yes, I know, this has never happened before, I will, I will...” He glanced up at the members now filing in, “I will ask him, of course. I apologize.”
Luhan’s face is pale and he has a painful headache as he tries with all his might to think back and make sense of something but the manager already hung up the phone and is walking towards him.
“What happened out there!” The manager comes up to Luhan and hits him over the head, and Luhan stumbles backwards, “Are you trying to ruin this for us!” The manager yells at him, and the other artists in the waiting room all turn around to see what’s going on. Luhan keeps his head down and remains silent, and slowly---through the pain---he suddenly feels that this room is familiar to him.
"This is live broadcast! Do you understand, live broadcast! Our company's artists aren't the only ones who perform at the music awards! A group needs 10 years to gain recognition, and only one day to ruin it all! If we win this award, do you want everyone to say we don't deserve it?” The manager continues to shout at Luhan, but Luhan slowly raises his head, his face ashen.
“Music awards?” He turns around to look at everyone, “Newcomer awards? But didn’t we already win...”
The room falls silent.
The manager stares at him blankly, then lifts his hand and slaps him hard across the face.
Luhan feels a faint buzzing in his ears as he stares at the floor, head knocked violently to one side. This really is a familiar waiting room, that performance earlier was also a familiar stage, it feels as if he’s already experienced everything before, but yet---it’s not entirely the same.
Kris pulls a stunned Luhan behind himself, "If we win the award, I will explain and apologize when I give my speech.”
“Explain?! How can you explain this?” The manager stares at Kris as if he’s out of his mind.
Kris pauses before continuing, “I’ll say that he‘s too drained so he's beginning to hallucinate.”
“Are you trying to say that the company mistreats the idols?” The manager accuses him.
“Then...” Kris thinks, “I’ll say that he dropped his mic.”
The manager retorts, “Mic problems happen often. Have you seen anyone space out completely the way he did?"
Kris looks the manager in the eye, "then I won't explain; I'll just apologize.”
The manager looks back and forth between Kris and Luhan, then at the staff members and makeup artists waving and signalling him over, “You guys go fix your makeup first, then sit in the pre-decided order in the audience. If you get an award later, you two leaders handle it. Your attitude must be sincere, enough so that no one is able to question you," Suho and Kris nod and bow towards him, and he turns to Luhan, “As for you, we’ll settle this later!”
Seeing that they've finished talking, the makeup artists rush forward to fix the makeup for all twelve of them. Unlike before where the boys would all try to talk at the same time, everyone is unusually quiet. Jongin looks at Baekhyun, who is putting on his eyeliner again, out of the corner of his eye, and Luhan is staring at the ceiling, thick foundation covering the fresh fingerprints on his cheek.
They arrive in the dark venue and quietly take their seats, but still cannot avoid the fans’ eagle eyes and end up causing a huge commotion. Joonmyun passes a message from one side to the other -- that if they receive an award later, they will bow on stage together for 10 full seconds.
“I read in the newspaper once that severe exhaustion can make people forget things," Tao stares at Luhan who is sitting far away between Chanyeol and Baekhyun, and whispers to Kris, "It's called temporary memory loss or something."
Kris looks in Luhan's direction and suddenly there is a small uproar among the fans; as it turns out, upon his request Yixing switched seats with Baekhyun and is now sitting beside Luhan.
"Luhan-ge! Its okay! We~ love~ you~!!" the fans discuss this briefly before chanting it in unison. Luhan hesitates, then wordlessly turns around and bows to the fans.
"Ah~~" A loud scream sounds from the back.
"That's possible," Kris agrees, "He's been taking sleeping pills now for the past few days, so he's probably not feeling very well."
"What?" Tao stares at Kris disbelievingly, "He has insomnia? I can't tell at all."
Kris glances at Tao calmly, "You fall asleep the quickest so of course you can't tell."
Tao is taken aback for a few seconds then turns to looks at Kris, "Don't tell me that when we share a room at the hotel, after I fall asleep you’re still suffering from insomnia?”
“Pay attention to the performance,” Kris says, and he plasters a smile on his face then proceeds to clap for the performance on stage to which he paid absolutely no attention.
Even though they already prepared themselves for it, when their name is announced for the rookie award Yixing is still so excited that he feels the urge to cry. The entire group rises from their seats and hug each other; Joonmyun stares at an equally touched Kris, eyes red, “You’ve worked hard.” he says as the two hug and pat each other on the shoulder. This scene is captured by excited fans one the side and goes on to circulate online and become one of the most heart-warming pictures of EXO at the award show.
Another picture that is more widely circulated is the picture taken when, after Luhan bows in apology, the entire group bows together for ten whole seconds. The caption of the picture is even more moving, "One person's mistake, twelve people's apology."
In the car on the way back, Luhan feels as if his head is about to explode. He grabs Yixing’s hand and asks anxiously, “What day is it today?”
Yixing stares at him, “the 29th.”
“December 29th, 2012?” Luhan murmurs with a frown.
Yixing nods silently.
Luhan looks out the window at the snow-covered streets quickly flashing by and asks, “Did you go mountain hiking with me recently? And we hit nails into the rock walls together...”
Yixing looks at him, grabs his shoulder and pulls him to his side, “Close your eyes and sleep for a while. You’re too tired.”
Head resting on Yixing’s shoulder, Luhan closes his eyes and tries to find a logical explanation for himself
He’s too tired, he spaced out when he was on stage and imagined a three month period in between. Daydreaming, he kept daydreaming on stage; he confused dreams with reality. It’s a side-effect of the sleeping pills; he developed a mental problem, he needs to get treated.
“Yixing, what’s the schedule for tomorrow?” he asks.
“A magazine shoot tomorrow afternoon, and a TV program in the evening,” Yixing replies.
“Then tomorrow morning, take me to the hospital,” Luhan says tiredly.
Yixing turns and looks at Luhan.
He fell asleep.
[1 Minute Ago]
“Close your eyes and sleep for a while. You’re too tired.” Yixing’s voice sounds by his ear.
Luhan rests his head on Yixing's shoulder, and closes his eyes as he tries to find a logical explanation for himself.
He’s too tired, he spaced out when he was on stage, and imagines a three month period in between; daydreaming, he kept daydreaming on stage; he confused dream with reality, it’s a side-effect of the sleeping pills; he developed a mental problem, he needs to get treated.
“Yixing, what’s the schedule for tomorrow?” he asks.
“A magazine shoot tomorrow afternoon, and a tv program in the evening,” Yixing replies.
“Then tomorrow morning, take me to the hospital,” Luhan says tiredly.
“Hm? Okay?” Luhan frowns and opens his eyes, and the harsh outdoor light forces him to cover his eyes. He suddenly feels as if he's lost his balance, his hands and feet lose their support and he falls hard on a smooth white surface.
When he is finally able to open his eyes completely, he doesn’t see Yixing beside him nor the car in front of him. There’s a red arrow on the ground, and the arrow is pointing towards a door.
Luhan stumbles to his feet and looks around him; this white surface seems to be a wide corridor, and behind him is what appears to be an endless mass of bright light. He stumbles forward in the direction the arrow points him in, and when he reaches the door he notices that to the left of the arrow there is a small door, however that is not what the arrow is pointing at.
His mind completely blank, Luhan stands in front of the door and hesitates for a moment. He knocks.
There's a sound of a key opening a lock, and after two seconds the door opens. A man with a wide grin opens the door, and gestures for him to come in.
“You’re finally here,” he says.
---
*Lord Lu: 鹿爷 (Lu ye), a common nickname for Luhan among Chinese fans.
*Proverb: 对牛弹琴 literally translates into playing music to a bull, means that you're trying to explain an intricate concept to a fool who won't understand anyway. This is a play on Kris's nickname, 牛仔哥 (denim brother).