The Scribblez! Where Haz They Gone?
First of all, thanks again for the kind thoughts about my October Challenge shortcomings. I need to work on my funny, as that was the original intent. And sinetimore , I really appreciate the offer to stomp the yard with my head if I used those tags again. I made them all up for that one entry...as puckbunny would say, "Le Sigh."
And now, I ramble....
I did realize today that I haven't been writing on paper in my journal much in the past year or so. I actually was writing in my journal today at lunch when I saw that it was just the third entry since July. I was sort of surprised at how much I got on paper in 15 minutes, especially since I type ever so much faster than I can write. Which explains the ignoring of the paper and the focus on the computer. That, and an accident in the meantime.
Another realization came to me and that is I am actually producing more written material and sharing less with the world or anyone else for that matter. I am averaging 800 words a day on 750words.com, and I sometimes use those scribbles as blog entries, and sometimes I actually create something new for the blogs but I am putting less and less out there for others to read. And it doesn't bother me. I guess right now I am just pleased to be writing and don't give a damn what anyone thinks of it. That, and things on LJ have changed lately and I don't see it as for the better. Or for the worse, just different.
People have left, people have quit posting, or only post and seldom comment on anything I have to say, or don't even follow up to comments I leave on their LJ. It's just not the same. And I am not whining about it, just stating that some of the reasons I had for throwing stuff up on LJ have gone away or changed. It seems that many of the friendships struck up on the intertubes are fleeting. Much like real life, in fact.
You make friends with somebody, they become important for a season or three in your life then move on. Or you move on. Or something else happens. Earthquakes, famine, pestilence, rancid beef, babies, new jobs, more jobs, locusts, a better offer, a change of venue, or fresh baked apple pie. Could be any of a number of reasons, people drift like sand in desert. It's part of life and I think it is also part of G*d's plan.
I know in my own experience that I will read a raft of books about say, Baseball all in one span of time. I can't get enough about baseball in my reading. Online, offline, inline, I'm reading or thinking baseball. Then, I reach a point, I need a Perry Mason novel, or Sherlock Holmes or a biography or something and I don't touch a baseball book for months. Then I drift back into it and this analogy really sucks because it isn't exactly right.
I have had friends that I met on the job, and we worked well together or got along very well together. I leave the job and never see them again. I've run across these folks later in life and it sure isn't the same. It is like that one time and place was time for the friendship to shine, which is did, then faded. Sort of like a garden that needs constant attention. Watering it after a time of no attention just makes the ground wet and doesn't do much else.
So, I've been holding some of my writing back. Not that it is any good, for all that. Some of it is little more than exercises. Short scenes with dialogue because I don't write dialogue very well (I think) and wish to work on it. Or I just have a scene I want to write. I write it, and go "Meh." I have that reaction to a lot of my scribbles. It's okay or "meh." Nothing fancy, nothing grand, just "meh." I'm a tough crowd, I guess.
I want my work to sing, to dance, to make you sing and dance and eat crackers in bed damning the consequences as you do so. I also want a chicken in every pot and that ain't happening either. Still, goals are something to work towards. Most of the time. Sometimes I just sit down to write and care not what comes through the keyboard and it shows. Sometimes it is downright mean-spirited and shouldn't be shared. I really let my hair down (and that expression always makes me think of the Charlie Rich song "Behind Closed Doors") and let the feelings fly. Which they do, like drunk people. All over the place. And that's okay. Emotional up-chuck isn't always a bad thing, but it doesn't always have to be shared either.
So I keep staring at the empty screen or the blank paper wondering how to accept the challenge, meet the challenge and fill the screen or paper. Like all things in life, sometimes it is good, sometimes it isn't. Sometimes it makes no sense (like now, I have no idea where this is or was going), but it is writing. Free writing is something new to me, and that explains why a lot isn't going anywhere nor should it.
So I write. As somebody once told me, "Accept the gift and go with it" or something like that. Tomorrow is another day and I hate cliches so it is time to quit for now.
====
I actually proof-read this and made some changes. So, if it still makes no sense it isn't for a lack of trying. Still, this is essentially what came from my 750 writing today. This after all my grand ideas about what to write about today took a powder. Darned ideas are never around when you need 'em. :-)
And now, I ramble....
I did realize today that I haven't been writing on paper in my journal much in the past year or so. I actually was writing in my journal today at lunch when I saw that it was just the third entry since July. I was sort of surprised at how much I got on paper in 15 minutes, especially since I type ever so much faster than I can write. Which explains the ignoring of the paper and the focus on the computer. That, and an accident in the meantime.
Another realization came to me and that is I am actually producing more written material and sharing less with the world or anyone else for that matter. I am averaging 800 words a day on 750words.com, and I sometimes use those scribbles as blog entries, and sometimes I actually create something new for the blogs but I am putting less and less out there for others to read. And it doesn't bother me. I guess right now I am just pleased to be writing and don't give a damn what anyone thinks of it. That, and things on LJ have changed lately and I don't see it as for the better. Or for the worse, just different.
People have left, people have quit posting, or only post and seldom comment on anything I have to say, or don't even follow up to comments I leave on their LJ. It's just not the same. And I am not whining about it, just stating that some of the reasons I had for throwing stuff up on LJ have gone away or changed. It seems that many of the friendships struck up on the intertubes are fleeting. Much like real life, in fact.
You make friends with somebody, they become important for a season or three in your life then move on. Or you move on. Or something else happens. Earthquakes, famine, pestilence, rancid beef, babies, new jobs, more jobs, locusts, a better offer, a change of venue, or fresh baked apple pie. Could be any of a number of reasons, people drift like sand in desert. It's part of life and I think it is also part of G*d's plan.
I know in my own experience that I will read a raft of books about say, Baseball all in one span of time. I can't get enough about baseball in my reading. Online, offline, inline, I'm reading or thinking baseball. Then, I reach a point, I need a Perry Mason novel, or Sherlock Holmes or a biography or something and I don't touch a baseball book for months. Then I drift back into it and this analogy really sucks because it isn't exactly right.
I have had friends that I met on the job, and we worked well together or got along very well together. I leave the job and never see them again. I've run across these folks later in life and it sure isn't the same. It is like that one time and place was time for the friendship to shine, which is did, then faded. Sort of like a garden that needs constant attention. Watering it after a time of no attention just makes the ground wet and doesn't do much else.
So, I've been holding some of my writing back. Not that it is any good, for all that. Some of it is little more than exercises. Short scenes with dialogue because I don't write dialogue very well (I think) and wish to work on it. Or I just have a scene I want to write. I write it, and go "Meh." I have that reaction to a lot of my scribbles. It's okay or "meh." Nothing fancy, nothing grand, just "meh." I'm a tough crowd, I guess.
I want my work to sing, to dance, to make you sing and dance and eat crackers in bed damning the consequences as you do so. I also want a chicken in every pot and that ain't happening either. Still, goals are something to work towards. Most of the time. Sometimes I just sit down to write and care not what comes through the keyboard and it shows. Sometimes it is downright mean-spirited and shouldn't be shared. I really let my hair down (and that expression always makes me think of the Charlie Rich song "Behind Closed Doors") and let the feelings fly. Which they do, like drunk people. All over the place. And that's okay. Emotional up-chuck isn't always a bad thing, but it doesn't always have to be shared either.
So I keep staring at the empty screen or the blank paper wondering how to accept the challenge, meet the challenge and fill the screen or paper. Like all things in life, sometimes it is good, sometimes it isn't. Sometimes it makes no sense (like now, I have no idea where this is or was going), but it is writing. Free writing is something new to me, and that explains why a lot isn't going anywhere nor should it.
So I write. As somebody once told me, "Accept the gift and go with it" or something like that. Tomorrow is another day and I hate cliches so it is time to quit for now.
====
I actually proof-read this and made some changes. So, if it still makes no sense it isn't for a lack of trying. Still, this is essentially what came from my 750 writing today. This after all my grand ideas about what to write about today took a powder. Darned ideas are never around when you need 'em. :-)