on a sad note...
*Faded Stars*
(for Bill)
Seeing that old familiar stare
as your memories flood my thoughts
conversations understood
like no one elses
as I stared into the broken chocolate walls
I once thought were only held by me
Trying to grab your hand
before you driwn far beneath the tars of injustice
like all the fallen angels take home..
too soon
A rare shimmer among a world of faded stars,
knowing the true beauty that lies within you,
regretting all the memories I could have had
but never ceased,
yet another " too little... too late."
Wishing I could see that smile
right before me,
Not on the fading photographs
swimming though my own personal regret
Will you ever know the place inside
I hold for you..
being a speck of light for me
when there was nothing
but demons,
being able to share parts-
feelings
Which I kept from all the masks in my world,
yours was always real-
true
Will you ever know
how I truly felt..
wondering each day
when Id see your smiling face again,
or share yet another memory
with you
A rare beauty
like imprisoned isicles that drip from the corners of a captured nightmare
too hard to believe are real
yet too special to deny
Wondering what fucked up lessons are supposed to be
learned,
not undestanding
their reasons.
Why you?
Picking though a hat of names
written in charcoal-
laughing as they watch yet another good one
float towards them,
leaving the fakes ones
behind.
Searching desperately for any sense of this all,
screaming silently into your ears,
for I am muted..
banned from feeling,
held here in this world of shit
and lies.
Knowing your dancing in a land of beauty
almost
as rare as yours,
Hopeing you can hear my distant words
as I share my thoughts of presant times.
Hoping all the future times of light and goodness
will still be shared with you
as you bounce unknowingly beside us.
You will be eternally missed Bill..
and forever Loved.
Yet another shimmer..
among a sky of faded stars.
Rest in peace Bill... I love you.. and Im sorry I never let you know just how much. :(
<33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
I wrote that exactly one year ago today... I fucking miss you bill.. Sometimes... I still pretend your just on another one of your lil disapearing acts :(..
Ill always love you.. Rest In Peace buddy..
12-12-02 Billy Amells<3
(for Bill)
Seeing that old familiar stare
as your memories flood my thoughts
conversations understood
like no one elses
as I stared into the broken chocolate walls
I once thought were only held by me
Trying to grab your hand
before you driwn far beneath the tars of injustice
like all the fallen angels take home..
too soon
A rare shimmer among a world of faded stars,
knowing the true beauty that lies within you,
regretting all the memories I could have had
but never ceased,
yet another " too little... too late."
Wishing I could see that smile
right before me,
Not on the fading photographs
swimming though my own personal regret
Will you ever know the place inside
I hold for you..
being a speck of light for me
when there was nothing
but demons,
being able to share parts-
feelings
Which I kept from all the masks in my world,
yours was always real-
true
Will you ever know
how I truly felt..
wondering each day
when Id see your smiling face again,
or share yet another memory
with you
A rare beauty
like imprisoned isicles that drip from the corners of a captured nightmare
too hard to believe are real
yet too special to deny
Wondering what fucked up lessons are supposed to be
learned,
not undestanding
their reasons.
Why you?
Picking though a hat of names
written in charcoal-
laughing as they watch yet another good one
float towards them,
leaving the fakes ones
behind.
Searching desperately for any sense of this all,
screaming silently into your ears,
for I am muted..
banned from feeling,
held here in this world of shit
and lies.
Knowing your dancing in a land of beauty
almost
as rare as yours,
Hopeing you can hear my distant words
as I share my thoughts of presant times.
Hoping all the future times of light and goodness
will still be shared with you
as you bounce unknowingly beside us.
You will be eternally missed Bill..
and forever Loved.
Yet another shimmer..
among a sky of faded stars.
Rest in peace Bill... I love you.. and Im sorry I never let you know just how much. :(
<33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
I wrote that exactly one year ago today... I fucking miss you bill.. Sometimes... I still pretend your just on another one of your lil disapearing acts :(..
Ill always love you.. Rest In Peace buddy..
12-12-02 Billy Amells<3