Warning for anger, homophobia and transphobia
I. Hate. The world.
I shouldn't, either. Things have been going BRILLIANTLY. Well. Not brilliantly. It's been a rough week, but it's tech week so that's expected.
But then the Max, my co-president in GSA who is also gay had a story to tell me today. I guess apparently today in the boys' locker room (which is like the hub of all homophobic comments, I guess, I've never been in there), there were some boys explaining my trans* identity to another boy. According to Max, they were saying something akin to the following "I mean. She just decided to be trans one day. And so like... she's not human. And since she's not human, she's not protected by the Constitution!" Max felt horrible and because of that, shot really poorly in his rifle team match today, so I'm having him write an email to his coaches (one of whom is my former US teacher) explaining about language in the locker room and how it's affecting his performance and shit. Y'know. If they don't do anything, we'll just have to wait until I get physically attacked by kids who don't think I'm human. :| (I'm bitter right now. Sorry.)
So whatever. I've been called an it before. I can handle it. What sent me into a huge rage tonight is the fact that a picture of this week's GSA poster was posted on Facebook. We talked about blood donation rules for the MSM community, and has a comic on the poster. A former faculty member who is incredibly unaccepting commented on the poster, and eleven people liked the comment. Including a student leader. I just. I feel worthless. I've considered killing myself and politicizing my own death. Because apparently that's the only way shit gets done anymore.
As I said on plurk, I won't kill myself over this or any other thing of this nature, and for two reasons. The first is that I refuse to become another fucking statistic in the book. Killing myself fits neatly into that narrative, and I refuse to follow it. Just... no. I won't let it happen. The other reason is if I wasn't alive to be the target for this kind of stuff, other kids who maybe can't handle it would be the target. And I can't let that happen. When I decided to come out, I had to consider the possibility--no, the probability that stuff like this would happen, and I still came out. And I don't regret coming out. And I refuse to regret it, because I did the right thing.
Just. Holy fuck, they make it hard to stay alive. Apparently it gets better, but fuck me if I'm going to wait that long.
I shouldn't, either. Things have been going BRILLIANTLY. Well. Not brilliantly. It's been a rough week, but it's tech week so that's expected.
But then the Max, my co-president in GSA who is also gay had a story to tell me today. I guess apparently today in the boys' locker room (which is like the hub of all homophobic comments, I guess, I've never been in there), there were some boys explaining my trans* identity to another boy. According to Max, they were saying something akin to the following "I mean. She just decided to be trans one day. And so like... she's not human. And since she's not human, she's not protected by the Constitution!" Max felt horrible and because of that, shot really poorly in his rifle team match today, so I'm having him write an email to his coaches (one of whom is my former US teacher) explaining about language in the locker room and how it's affecting his performance and shit. Y'know. If they don't do anything, we'll just have to wait until I get physically attacked by kids who don't think I'm human. :| (I'm bitter right now. Sorry.)
So whatever. I've been called an it before. I can handle it. What sent me into a huge rage tonight is the fact that a picture of this week's GSA poster was posted on Facebook. We talked about blood donation rules for the MSM community, and has a comic on the poster. A former faculty member who is incredibly unaccepting commented on the poster, and eleven people liked the comment. Including a student leader. I just. I feel worthless. I've considered killing myself and politicizing my own death. Because apparently that's the only way shit gets done anymore.
As I said on plurk, I won't kill myself over this or any other thing of this nature, and for two reasons. The first is that I refuse to become another fucking statistic in the book. Killing myself fits neatly into that narrative, and I refuse to follow it. Just... no. I won't let it happen. The other reason is if I wasn't alive to be the target for this kind of stuff, other kids who maybe can't handle it would be the target. And I can't let that happen. When I decided to come out, I had to consider the possibility--no, the probability that stuff like this would happen, and I still came out. And I don't regret coming out. And I refuse to regret it, because I did the right thing.
Just. Holy fuck, they make it hard to stay alive. Apparently it gets better, but fuck me if I'm going to wait that long.