Pez Dispenser
So, I'm looking at the Hello Kitty pez dispenser that Logan got me for Valentine's Day. Very cute. Wish it had pez in it *tear*. I guess I don't really know what to say, but I feel like I haven't updated this in a long time and there's really no excuse for that. So, let me fill you in...
My birthday is less than a week away! I'm usually VERY excited about my birthday and all that it entails (if you know me well enough, you know this), but for some reason, I'm not quite as amped up about it as usual. I think I'm sliding into a bit of a funk, actually. I finished with my long-term sub job last Friday, and I haven't had any work since. Do I want any work? I don't really know. The prospect of starting something completely new and different is a bit frightening. Part of me really wants to have the freedom that subbing will give me: I can choose to work when I want, I will meet lots of new people and make some great contacts, and I may find out that I really love teaching a certain grade. I just wish I didn't get so nervous about everything, you know? I'm all about being prepared and knowing what I'm going to do and how I'm going to do it, but subbing doesn't give you that luxury. Maybe it will make me more confident and spontaneous. That would be great. I wouldn't be surprised if no one calls me on Friday to work, because it's a big testing week in Branford (where I am currently registered to sub). I'm also filling out an application for Madison Public Schools, so we'll see if I get any work from that. At any rate, I just need to stop worrying about it. I am completely capable of handling most things that would be thrown my way in terms of classroom situations (I hope). Keep your fingers crossed for me.
Cricket, my beautiful little puppy, is doing well. Her growing seems to have slowed for a bit, but she seems to be filling out quite nicely. She is definitely a handful, and Logan is great with her. He ends up taking her outside most of the time, because I'm... well, I don't know... apathetic maybe. I find that I'm not really great at sharing the load at home. I'm not a good housekeeper, I don't often pitch in with daily chores unless I'm in the mood or I'm pestered, and I'd rather be reading or watching television (blech) or playing a computer game than doing most other things. I have all this shit on my plate, and I'm totally unwilling to do it. Why is that? Fear? Yeah, I suppose there's a little of that involved. But why is it that I can be such a hard worker sometimes and such a lazy piece of crap most other times?
And especially lately, I'm just so... disconnected. I crave more time alone, but at the same time, i would love to spend time with my friends. The bad thing about living here is that it's so isolated. I've gone for months without seeing some of my friends. I really only have a few relatively close friends who live here, but all the people I want to spend the most time with, don't even live in this state! It's a crime when I only get to see my closest friends once or twice a year. I miss them terribly. I wish we could just hang out. That would be great fun.
Maybe I will feel better about everything if I take some steps to clean shit up around here. Maybe my chi is suffering because my laundry situation is unthinkably horrendous. I need to stop putting off all the things I've been meaning to do and just go do them! I have no excuses, right?
After a statement like that, I would normally say something like, "The apathy ends today!" but I know that's not necessarily true. So, the apathy is put on hold for the moment, and will sneak back when it will. In the words of Stuart Smalley, "And that's.... OK."
My birthday is less than a week away! I'm usually VERY excited about my birthday and all that it entails (if you know me well enough, you know this), but for some reason, I'm not quite as amped up about it as usual. I think I'm sliding into a bit of a funk, actually. I finished with my long-term sub job last Friday, and I haven't had any work since. Do I want any work? I don't really know. The prospect of starting something completely new and different is a bit frightening. Part of me really wants to have the freedom that subbing will give me: I can choose to work when I want, I will meet lots of new people and make some great contacts, and I may find out that I really love teaching a certain grade. I just wish I didn't get so nervous about everything, you know? I'm all about being prepared and knowing what I'm going to do and how I'm going to do it, but subbing doesn't give you that luxury. Maybe it will make me more confident and spontaneous. That would be great. I wouldn't be surprised if no one calls me on Friday to work, because it's a big testing week in Branford (where I am currently registered to sub). I'm also filling out an application for Madison Public Schools, so we'll see if I get any work from that. At any rate, I just need to stop worrying about it. I am completely capable of handling most things that would be thrown my way in terms of classroom situations (I hope). Keep your fingers crossed for me.
Cricket, my beautiful little puppy, is doing well. Her growing seems to have slowed for a bit, but she seems to be filling out quite nicely. She is definitely a handful, and Logan is great with her. He ends up taking her outside most of the time, because I'm... well, I don't know... apathetic maybe. I find that I'm not really great at sharing the load at home. I'm not a good housekeeper, I don't often pitch in with daily chores unless I'm in the mood or I'm pestered, and I'd rather be reading or watching television (blech) or playing a computer game than doing most other things. I have all this shit on my plate, and I'm totally unwilling to do it. Why is that? Fear? Yeah, I suppose there's a little of that involved. But why is it that I can be such a hard worker sometimes and such a lazy piece of crap most other times?
And especially lately, I'm just so... disconnected. I crave more time alone, but at the same time, i would love to spend time with my friends. The bad thing about living here is that it's so isolated. I've gone for months without seeing some of my friends. I really only have a few relatively close friends who live here, but all the people I want to spend the most time with, don't even live in this state! It's a crime when I only get to see my closest friends once or twice a year. I miss them terribly. I wish we could just hang out. That would be great fun.
Maybe I will feel better about everything if I take some steps to clean shit up around here. Maybe my chi is suffering because my laundry situation is unthinkably horrendous. I need to stop putting off all the things I've been meaning to do and just go do them! I have no excuses, right?
After a statement like that, I would normally say something like, "The apathy ends today!" but I know that's not necessarily true. So, the apathy is put on hold for the moment, and will sneak back when it will. In the words of Stuart Smalley, "And that's.... OK."