(no subject)
Yesterday was easier then today, and that worries me. Yesterday I went through ups and downs, I had periods of sobs, but then big chunks of my day I felt free, stronger, independent. Today just hurts. I keep trying to leave my room, but I break down everytime before I can reach the door.
11:11 came around this morning during the middle of me wiping the pounds of mascara off from all over my face, and I had no wish. I don't know what I want. Well, I do. But I don't know how and I don't know why. Now I have no one to let me down, no one to disapoint me and push me away and make me feel unwanted. I keep trying to tell myself it's better this way, and I know my head is listening, but my heart isn't.
I need to be home.
11:11 came around this morning during the middle of me wiping the pounds of mascara off from all over my face, and I had no wish. I don't know what I want. Well, I do. But I don't know how and I don't know why. Now I have no one to let me down, no one to disapoint me and push me away and make me feel unwanted. I keep trying to tell myself it's better this way, and I know my head is listening, but my heart isn't.
I need to be home.