1st ♒ [text]

[yerawizarderri]

[It had taken a considerate amount of time, But Eridan had figured out how to use the SFC since it wasn't all too different from the computer he had gotten used to while in the veil. And so he types a message.]

hello

Comments

[ACTION]

[yerawizarderri]

[He was afraid of that. He knew of Karkat's claim for hating everyone, but he definitely meant something deeper than Karkat's usual claim. And here he got the answer. He knew it wasn't going to be some magical 'why no eridan i could never hate you hurp' but he had somehow, for some reason, hoped that maybe he could completely rectify what he had done. But at least, now he knew that it wasn't exactly achievable. And in a way--it was discouraging. It wasn't going to stop him from trying though, but it definitely made his heart sink.]

[He had to live with the consequences of his actions and he hated it, he couldn't just pretend it didn't happen, couldn't just run away. He had to just deal with it.]

Well, you knew what I meant anyway... But... Alright, I understand...

[Yeah, he was completely hurt by this, but that was to be expected. It wasn't like Eridan liked how most of this has turned out, and it just seemed to be getting worse for him in ways. Sure, he had a place to stay now, Karkat was his moirail and he was helping him on his way to redemption--but Eridan really just wished he could take back what he had done. If he had just been thinking clearly, not letting his anger rule him per usual... If only...]

[It didn't matter. If this, if only that, wasn't going to change anything. What was done was done and Eridan was just going to have to learn to live with it.]

[ACTION]

[yerawizarderri]

[Eridan was well aware of how the time bullshit went, it was his fucking destiny to fuck up this badly, to have everyone hate him and to be abandoned. It just hurt to think about really, that if he had done any different, it would have been a doomed time line, that it wasn't how things were suppose to be. The entire thing was just shitty, all of this was entirely shitty and all Eridan could do is some feeble attempt at groveling and improving himself and even then, all wouldn't be forgiven. He actually felt more helpless now than he did back in the veil waiting to die.]

[Eridan waves Karkat away in an almost shooing motion.]

I will... And no, I'm fine. I don't got anymore questions or anythin'... Thanks for all your help.

[As much as Eridan hated being alone, he truly felt it might be for the best for now. It wasn't like Karkat was exactly going to comfort him and he just needed to think things through for once.]

[ACTION]

[yerawizarderri]

[Eridan wasn't looking at karkat, so that frown? He didn't catch it. He just nods before putting holding his head, his fingers on his forehead rubbing the spot as if he was trying to cure some head ache or something.]

...Okay.

[All of this was so goddamn hard, so difficult and while he wasn't exactly looking for pity, he wished at least someone could understand. But none of them would, no one would understand his side to this. He did a terrible thing, undeniably, but he hated the fact that his side was going to be left untouched, misunderstood, and soon forgotten. He told Karkat he didn't kill without a reason, and he meant it. Even if he explained his side, he figured, it wouldn't change anything, wouldn't make anything more understandable. Even if, he thought, it undeniably should have.]

[It was all so aggravating, and he was glad that he was going to get time alone to sort out his thoughts. Because? He really needed to.]