Sorry to me and everyone else: A note to myself and to anyone else who may be interested.
Although this entry may have been inspired by recent confrontation, it is by no means directed to any specific person, besides my own; it is merely a personal realization that I found significant enough to write about.
I used to think I was above all the high school bullshit. I realized today that I was part of the high school bullshit, and to some extent, I still am. We are all special and fucked up for our own unique reasons, and no one is any better than anyone else.
I learned in psychology that it is always easier to react to problems aggressively or passively, rather than assertively. To lash out or to deny are much more natural aspects of our "fight-or-flight" mechanism than is dealing with the issue, respectfully but directly. Yet assertiveness, although more challenging, is the surest way to rid oneself of any bitterness or resentment.
It is hard to stand up for oneself while considering the feelings of others, but isn't it worth it to try, just to hold on to people who are important to us? What about the people who have helped us through things? Is it really worth it to let go of those people just because we're too afraid to talk to them, and to apologize? Because we're afraid that we'll lose our pride, or that the other person won't admit their mistakes? Because we don't think we should have to take the first step? I do not believe in apologizing just to alleviate confrontation, because this in itself creates resentment, but can we not try to see the other person's point of view?
Go to university. Or don't.
Work. Or don't.
Have a boyfriend. Or don't.
Be happy. Or don't.
Listen to rap. Or don't.
Go to a party. Or don't.
Just don't judge.
What is right for one person is not necessaruly right for another. Perhaps we all have the same objectives, but the way we go about realizing them is different. The only thing that we all MUST do is take responsibility for our actions. Everything we do affects other people.
We must try not to hurt people; not to judge people; and not to let go of our friends.
I used to think I was above all the high school bullshit. I realized today that I was part of the high school bullshit, and to some extent, I still am. We are all special and fucked up for our own unique reasons, and no one is any better than anyone else.
I learned in psychology that it is always easier to react to problems aggressively or passively, rather than assertively. To lash out or to deny are much more natural aspects of our "fight-or-flight" mechanism than is dealing with the issue, respectfully but directly. Yet assertiveness, although more challenging, is the surest way to rid oneself of any bitterness or resentment.
It is hard to stand up for oneself while considering the feelings of others, but isn't it worth it to try, just to hold on to people who are important to us? What about the people who have helped us through things? Is it really worth it to let go of those people just because we're too afraid to talk to them, and to apologize? Because we're afraid that we'll lose our pride, or that the other person won't admit their mistakes? Because we don't think we should have to take the first step? I do not believe in apologizing just to alleviate confrontation, because this in itself creates resentment, but can we not try to see the other person's point of view?
Go to university. Or don't.
Work. Or don't.
Have a boyfriend. Or don't.
Be happy. Or don't.
Listen to rap. Or don't.
Go to a party. Or don't.
Just don't judge.
What is right for one person is not necessaruly right for another. Perhaps we all have the same objectives, but the way we go about realizing them is different. The only thing that we all MUST do is take responsibility for our actions. Everything we do affects other people.
We must try not to hurt people; not to judge people; and not to let go of our friends.