(no subject)
It just asked me if I wanted to save my restored draft. What angsty thing did I almost write before? Feeling it tonight for sure! I listened to some emo. And NOT the good kind. "Ohio is for lovers...." is that song for real? I feel like it's so emo it's mocking itself. "Cut my wrists and black my eyes, so I can fall asleep tonight, or die." I wanted to be into it like I used to be but really it just made me chuckle. My life is ok, but I have some serious cabin fever in a bad way. Like, a vacation wouldn't even help. (not that I really have the money to make that happen anyway) It makes me want to drink, but I kind of hate drinking (well at least hate being hungover). There is definitely some pent up rage there. Feel like I'm in the way a lot, which you'd think would be hard considering I live alone!
Whereas I should be happy to have an education at all, I hate school so so much. It's like....flames....ON THE SIDES OF MY FACE. Really though. I skip class wayyy to much. Because I'm sick of paying someone even more apathetic than myself to lecture me for hours because it's necessary for the job I want. Which I would like to add is MUCH more interactive than looking at slides with 150 other kids! (Lolz.....kids.) I'm 26!
Everyone is settling down and having kids and getting steady jobs. Why? How are they so sure that's what's right? Because society tells them it's right! And in 4 years, WHEN I'm unmarried and childless at 30, society will tell me it's WRONG. :/
I realized tonight that there are only 2 things I REALLY know about myself. A: I'm fairly virtuous, and B: I don't like people telling me what to do. EVERYTHING else is subjective. I just want to be passionate about ONE THING. (more than one thing would be ok too) but unfortunately I care about nothing.
On the bright side: Going to see a concert at a brewery this weekend with people that I don't normally hang out.
Whereas I should be happy to have an education at all, I hate school so so much. It's like....flames....ON THE SIDES OF MY FACE. Really though. I skip class wayyy to much. Because I'm sick of paying someone even more apathetic than myself to lecture me for hours because it's necessary for the job I want. Which I would like to add is MUCH more interactive than looking at slides with 150 other kids! (Lolz.....kids.) I'm 26!
Everyone is settling down and having kids and getting steady jobs. Why? How are they so sure that's what's right? Because society tells them it's right! And in 4 years, WHEN I'm unmarried and childless at 30, society will tell me it's WRONG. :/
I realized tonight that there are only 2 things I REALLY know about myself. A: I'm fairly virtuous, and B: I don't like people telling me what to do. EVERYTHING else is subjective. I just want to be passionate about ONE THING. (more than one thing would be ok too) but unfortunately I care about nothing.
On the bright side: Going to see a concert at a brewery this weekend with people that I don't normally hang out.