The meaning of mine for j2ster
For: j2ster
Title: The meaning of mine
Pairing: Chanyeol/Sehun
Rating: NC-17
Length: 9.2k
Summary: Sehun always poses the question (and Chanyeol always provides an answer)
Warnings: semi-public sex, switching, biting, marking, the tiniest bit of edging, one mention of alcohol, lots of angst
Author’s note: i am so happy that i could be a part of this exchange. all of the prompts i received were absolutely wonderful, it was difficult choosing which one to work on first. sadly, due to irl circumstances, the second fic i had been working on could not be completed in time to submit to this exchange (i just had so many ideas for it!) so i hope you enjoy this fic and i will be happy to gift you the second fic once i have finished it. this, as things often do, started out with smut but quickly turned into angst. i hope you enjoy it!
Sehun has been teasing him all day.
Not teasing in the schoolyard sense, though sometimes they do that as well. It’s playful banter and good-natured tussles most of the time. But today, he is teasing him in a much more suggestive manner: brushing along him when passing him in the hallway, draping himself over his back when reaching for something in a cupboard, resting his hand on his thigh when he was just leaning over for the remote.
It’s the kind of teasing that makes Chanyeol’s blood pump loudly in his ears and when he wakes up to see Sehun completely naked and standing near the dresser with a cup of coffee in hand like he’s just casually lounging, Chanyeol decides that this little game has reached a fever pitch.
“Well good morning to you,” he greets, his gaze naturally traveling along all of Sehun’s exposed body.
Sehun always looks so soft in the morning, so small. His hair would be a mess from rubbing it into the pillow and his lips shiny from drool. He would blush at that, covering his face with blankets and making Chanyeol look away because “wah~ I’m not pretty just yet, give me time to wake up and freshen up!”
But with the way he’s standing tall, the muscles in his right leg defined as he puts his weight on it and rests his toned back along the dresser, he looks strong. He looks like an alpha and Chanyeol needs to rub at his eyes and wake himself up a little more for it to fully sink in that he is.
And not only that, but he’s his alpha.
Chanyeol rolls out of bed and takes the sheet with him, wrapping it over his back and looking like the complete opposite of his boyfriend right now. Sehun chuckles and wraps him in a hug before he can even make it to the bathroom.
“Good morning to you too,” he says cheerfully and even though it’s early, Chanyeol smiles back as bright as the sun.
He turns and then there is that damn tease again, in the form of Sehun’s cock pressed against his thigh. He is slightly hard and he can’t blame it on morning wood like Chanyeol can. And that giggle that he emits in return to Chanyeol facing him is not doing much to make him seem innocent.
“You’re absolutely ridiculous,” he informs him, his voice coming out a little scratchy and rough from just having woken up.
“The day hasn’t even started yet!” He says in defense and before he can pick his mug back up to take another sip of coffee, Chanyeol is backing him into the side of the bed and bringing them both down to flop on top of it.
Sehun yips in surprise but then he’s laughing hard, playfully pushing at Chanyeol’s chest and arms, wriggling and giggling so much that his broad chest is heaving and his boyfriend can’t help but stare at it. From the way his skin is still supple from sleep and completely covered in their shared scent, Chanyeol knows that he hasn’t gone for a run yet and he thinks it would be a good idea for them to go now, if only to release some of this leftover adrenaline from the day prior.
Of course he would want to release it inside of his gorgeous and utterly naked boyfriend right now but he’s been going through a bit of a rut himself: he’s an alpha as well. It creates an interesting, though also exasperating, dynamic between them. And sometimes a conflicting one when natural instinct begins to top practicality.
Sehun has been getting the itch as well, going as far as rutting against furniture he walks past and grinding down on the mattress in his sleep. Of course Chanyeol has noticed it, how the alpha in Sehun aches to bury itself deep inside a mate, but then there is that teasing that coincides with it. There’s that delectable ass that Sehun sticks out and flaunts off as he sways with each step and he aches for that to be filled too, stretched out and leaking from his alpha.
It’s contradictory and exciting and frustrating all at once and Chanyeol just wants to clear his mind, get some exercise in before he settles into the day just so he won’t be teeming with untended to hormones for the whole duration of his weekend.
He pecks a kiss on Sehun’s lips and can pick up on the whine emitting from them when he stands up instead of leaning into it. Chanyeol holds onto his hands and helps him out of bed, still holding onto them as he asks “How about a run?”
Sehun is beaming as he replies. “Of course. Go freshen up first, I’ll meet you at the deck.”
He makes his way to the door, that plump ass of his bouncing with each step and it makes Chanyeol call out, “Will you be wearing clothes on this adventure?”
“Nope. I plan on shifting.”
Good, Chanyeol wants to say. He had the same plan in mind.
He hums an affirmative before heading to the bathroom.
When he reaches the back deck, Sehun is still just as bare as the day he was born and leaning against the railing, staring out at the vast expanse of land that awaits them. Their area is pertained entirely of wolf hybrids who have resided on these same grounds generations before them. This is where they would have birthday parties together, would sit around the bonfire and play hide and seek and share their first innocent, curious kiss while lazing in the shade of the biggest, tallest tree they’ve ever seen. They’ve shared many more kisses since then and when Sehun turns to face him with a warm smile and blush heading south, Chanyeol finds that far less innocent ones will comprise his near future.
That warm smile turns mischievous when Sehun says out of nowhere, “Race you to the creek!”
He’s sprinting off before Chanyeol has even processed his words but he catches on quickly, long legs running two steps at a time down the stairs of the deck and off into the wilderness ahead, the wilderness they know so well.
Twigs snap underfoot and they pass the tree that holds their carved initials. Chanyeol’s sight often lands to the toned, lean body before him as they sprint towards their goal. Sehun is nothing short of marvelous from head to toe, always having a natural beauty to him. He looks rather similar to how he’s always looked, only now much taller and broader, with sharp features that soften each time he smiles. Chanyeol stares closely at the muscles that he’s built as well, admiring how they shift under his beautiful skin.
And then Sehun is actually shifting, gorgeous sunny skin breaking away under the canopy of trees to reveal fur. His muscles and bones shift, his back hunching as he lunges forward and breaks into an even faster run on all fours once his wolf has been freed and is open to the still damp but sunny morning air.
Chanyeol follows that lead, is spurred on by it. When he lunges down onto his front legs it is almost in an effort to catch the wolf that he is chasing, who he is, with all the rationality left underneath the roar of his instincts, letting win this little game rather than trapping him beneath his paws now caked with dirt and snapping branches.
With the beast in him now fully overtaking, he is less generous with the distance he had been keeping, sprinting past Sehun with a newfound speed and urgency that often courses through him when he has just shifted. His tongue lulls from his open mouth as he thunders on and he can practically taste the freshwater creek not far off, picking up on the sound of the babbling stream.
Sehun proves to be a formidable opponent, however, when he catches up to Chanyeol rather quickly and meets him at the edge of the embankment seconds after the older wolf has already reached it. This is a familiar area for them, the scent of wolf strongly lingering in the air. It provides a sense of comfort to the two, a place that they can always go to, letting loose what is usually tucked away inside of them to make room for their daily life.
Sehun had always been more keen on shifting out of all the other hybrid kids their age. He didn’t explain this, or rather couldn’t, but Chanyeol knew it was because sometimes the only way Sehun could express himself was with his wolf. He wasn’t expected to speak when he was shifted, lacked the ability to obviously, and so he didn’t need to search for the right words to say. There was a simplicity to this that Sehun often reveled in and Chanyeol had to agree that he felt it too. In troubling times, he always had his wolf that he could rely on.
Living side by side with a horny alpha who just so happened to be his boyfriend was not the most troubling of circumstances but it did directly affect the instincts that now took front and center within him, so Chanyeol was aching to shift. With his long tongue poking out as he smiled, he took joy in being able to run free like this.
It made him so joyful all over that he couldn’t help but trot over to Sehun and bump his snout into his, leaning back on his haunches so he can paw at the soft fur around his neck.
Sehun sniffles back at him, pawing at his own nose that had grown wet from Chanyeol’s pressing against it. Chanyeol took this as an opportunity to pounce on the other playfully, making them both tumble to the ground that had grown wet from morning dew and the creek that streamed along nearby. Yelping, Sehun regained his footing only to tackle Chanyeol, holding onto him so they could both roll around on the muddy embankment together.
That was another great thing about shifting like this: it allowed them to be carefree. Now, they were wolves with absolutely no worries: no prey lurked in these woods and haven’t for generations. Tucked into their own personal paradise like this, they could prance and play and paw at each other all that they wanted without having to think about work or bills or the very unconventional pairing that they make.
They could act like little wolf pups again and wrestle around like they used to, and that they sometimes find themselves still doing now. They aren’t as gentle with their lunges, however. They know each other’s boundaries, know exactly what the other can take and know that their wolf can take even more. Their majestic forms are quickly becoming muddy and the thuds they make when landing on the ground are loud. They are having the most fun in weeks though, panting happily and licking at each other fondly.
It begins to escalate when those licks turn into nips and their tackling becomes just a bit harsher, sending them tussling and growling and rolling all around the embankment. A particular hard shove from Sehun sends Chanyeol scuttling onto the ground roughly, a loud whimper of surprise echoing through the expanse of the creek making all of the birds perched atop the trees squawk and take off all at once.
It also has Chanyeol so surprised that he suddenly shifts out of his wolf form and rolls over onto his back, eyes nearly bulging. Sehun shifts seamlessly once he sees his boyfriend on the ground, closing the distance between them quickly to see if there’s anything wrong, worry written all over his face. Before he can voice his concerns, though, Chanyeol is chuckling again and pulling on the other man’s arm so he falls to the ground with him, continuing their little sparring match.
With renewed vigor and a particularly high-pitched laugh, Sehun grips onto him tightly and sends them rolling again so Chanyeol is no longer on his back. There’s just a light scrape along his leg that is mostly covered in dirt and a leaf mixed in with his curly hair so he isn’t as worried as he was, just enjoying being this close to his boyfriend and having this much fun. The close proximity and distance from their busy weeks is exactly what he’s been needing and when they have rolled over several times more, Sehun knows exactly why.
In their haste to be the one with the upper hand, one of Chanyeol’s long legs gets tangled with Sehun’s own, resting between them. Sehun suddenly goes lax beneath the other man, making Chanyeol fall forward, pressing that much closer to his already sensitive body.
That was another thing about shifting that they hadn’t really thought through: how it made their skin tingle, their senses heighten, and their hormones that much stronger once they’ve shifted back.
Sehun doesn’t notice he’s hard until a moan escapes his mouth and he’s quick to try and swallow it back up, but it’s already out in the open air before he can. Chanyeol’s face is inches from his, his body shaking from how unexpectedly erotic the other man sounds. With a palm planted onto the ground on either side of Sehun’s head, Chanyeol has him perfectly caged, every inch of his supple, responsive body his for the taking. And of course Sehun is offering it, has been for the past week, or few days if he’s being generous, but with the way Sehun’s eyes are lust blown and lidded he decides that he wants to be greedy.
It isn’t so much the kiss that follows that has Sehun surprised, but moreso how harshly and desperately that it is given. He returns it fervently, however, grasping at Chanyeol’s skin and dragging him down to get even closer. That has his arms giving out and him flailing into Sehun’s embrace, continuing their rough play from earlier even as he slips his tongue into the younger man’s mouth.
They roll around once more so Sehun is now settled on top, holding Chanyeol’s face with both hands so he can deepen the kiss, hungrily licking his way into his mouth. The grip that finds its way around his hips just goads him on, has him grinding just the slightest bit onto Chanyeol’s lap and that’s really when he has had enough.
With a growl that has Sehun gasping, Chanyeol is tossing them over once more so he can have the little tease fully underneath him, so he can indulge him in what they have both been wanting to do for what feels like a lifetime.
He’s nipping at his neck but it is anything but light and playful: it serves a purpose. It is an extension of the pulse that now thunders underneath his skin and he is spelling out with his canines what it is roaring to him: mine, mine, mine.
It is not met with the expected demureness of the other wolf now in his grasp, the beautiful creature in his arms not slipping into submission. Instead, as Chanyeol was so focused on his task of marking, Sehun takes this opportunity to flip their positions, to roll his alpha onto his back with a thud before he proceeds to do the same.
Chanyeol notices those canines of his often, how they subtly peek out of Sehun’s mouth, pressing slightly on his full lips when he grins or giggles to himself. He admires them in a way that is indescribable, regards them in a way that leaves his mouth smiling but his brows furrowed. Sehun’s mouth often leaves him scrambling and he can’t decide whether he wants it hanging open on a moan or baring his teeth in a growl.
Greedily, Chanyeol decides once a mark has thoroughly been made on his neck and Sehun kisses it tenderly the next moment, that he wants both.
He wants it all.
The yip that gets stuck in Sehun’s throat when Chanyeol grips his hair and pulls him into a bruising kiss is utterly delicious and the wolf in him can’t help but nip and paw at the other alpha. In his haste, they go tumbling on the embankment, rolling so that Chanyeol is atop him one moment only to be pinned by the younger man the next.
There’s something strangely nostalgic about the way they tussle about, like young boys wrestling with each other playfully. As young wolf pups, they would shift out here when their control and precision with it wasn’t as skilled as it is now, when the instincts within them were a driving force more than a subtle intuition. They would yip and snarl and gnaw excitedly with a whole big world right in their backyard to explore and they did so together. Memories of them doing exactly that were coming back to him as strongly as the pheromones permeating between them.
Of course, it wasn’t exactly like this. Chanyeol didn’t even entertain the idea of being this close to his best friend until his first summer home from university, when he decided he would be staying after all. The distance from the boy he had grown up with and seeing the man he was rapidly becoming just from his few semesters away made his heart tug with this familiar yearning. And now, being more mature and experienced, he could put a name to that feeling.
Sehun’s name, that is.
Rank and instinct aside, that boy could be stubborn and had always known that he didn’t want Chanyeol to belong to anyone else. Chanyeol had always known that as well, but was just too scared to let himself think about it let alone voice it, worrying that if he did it would drastically change the bond that they had.
He’s thankful for his big heart and loud mouth now: his dramatic confession of love was what made that bond become even stronger, after all.
It was right here where he told him he would be leaving for school and it was right here where he informed him he was going to stay. Both times, Sehun had cried. He tried to hide it but the moonlight playing along his skin, making his tears twinkle like stars, made it obvious to Chanyeol.
The other families that live amongst them, long lines of generations that have grown side by side in this neck of the woods, have often joked that Sehun has even more hidden inside him than just wolf. A bit strange and hard to understand, especially as a child, he was often teased that if he tried hard enough, he could shift into something different entirely.
“Yeah, like an alien,” some of the other kids would say.
Sehun would cry then too and run off to a little alcove tucked near the creek, squeezing himself into the small bit of shelter that it was so he could cry or whimper in solitude. It was different from the clenching in his jaw and distant eyes that Chanyeol had been met with upon presenting his acceptance letter. There was a coldness, a resistance in it that made the older boy shiver; almost like he was using all of his strength to hold back the tears, like he could just burst if he held back any longer.
Intense emotions could cause shifts as well and being a child that hasn’t yet learned how to deal with or make sense of them, young wolf hybrids would uncontrollably shift often due to tantrums. Sehun was a boy who knew this all too well, his wolf being a place of comfort and contentment for him during those young, troubling years.
He was also a creature of habit so when Chanyeol was all packed up to drive further north, where the large and historic university resided, he didn’t have to pick up on his friend’s scent to find him tucked into that alcove again. Now with his long, spindly legs tucked close to his chest, he still looked as small as ever.
“This isn’t goodbye,” Chanyeol said. Sehun squeezed his eyes shut but listened closely all the same. “This is: I’ll see you later and I’ll be back soon.”
It still wasn’t soon enough if the way Sehun now grips tightly to Chanyeol’s body and refuses to let go has anything to say about it. His deep kisses and harsh tugs on Chanyeol’s lower lip, that nearly draws blood, pulls him out of his reminiscing and places him on his back once more. Sehun is grinding his hips down onto him with earnest, a feral haste to his movements that are still deliberate, that say stay right here.
Always yearning to give the other boy what he so desires, Chanyeol is nearly tempted to listen to the alpha’s silent but powerful call. Only his own is bubbling so rapidly under the surface that he can’t help but grab at Sehun’s wrists and dig them into the ground above his head, making his mouth fall open in surprise, eyes wide as they stare into the other’s.
His gaze is intense and oh, there are Sehun’s eyes twinkling back at him again, only his pupils are so blown out from arousal that Chanyeol doesn’t even have to press his hips down to know that Sehun has hastily become wet everywhere.
Once their bodies press close, deliberately from the older alpha between them as Sehun stays pinned from that gaze alone, Chanyeol can feel how much Sehun’s cock is leaking, making both of their abdomens damp and sticky.
Sehun has always loved the rawness and friction most, begging and whimpering to Chanyeol to make him “really feel it” by tossing the lube aside and bending over obscenely. There’s just something that had always excited him about the idea of skin on skin, of feeling the stretch and pull and burn that would leave him aching for days on end afterwards. He craved it and when he had sunk himself deep into Chanyeol in return for the first time, he finally understood it: it came from a desire to feel wanted, a need to belong. He would have fallen asleep with himself still tucked inside of Chanyeol if he could keep himself hard for that long.
“Could someone be both alpha and omega?” he posed to Chanyeol one night. After the rough fucking and tender spooning, existential conversations always followed: it was just how the two operated and they wouldn’t have it any other way.
“I don’t think it works that way,” Chanyeol replied. His family was casual about traditions where Sehun’s was strict but he was still nearly certain that something as solid as their very ranks was something unchangeable.
He turns over on his side and regards Sehun’s face in the darkness, still able to make out his sharp features that his warm heart softened. His look was pensive now, searching. Chanyeol always knew the man’s questions would far outnumber his statements.
“There is alpha and beta and omega, but there is still more than just that,” Chanyeol continued. Sehun regarded him with furrowed brows but there was more to what Chanyeol was saying. “There is you and there is me. And there is Junmyeon who lives down the street, and Jongin who we went to school with, and Kyungsoo who always gets your food for you at parties. Do you see what I’m trying to say?”
“I know who our friends are, Chanyeol,” Sehun replies, deadpan. He giggles when Chanyeol tosses a pillow on his face.
“What I mean is that different people act differently. Junmyeon is an omega but still bosses us around like a mother hen. Jongin is an alpha who is more interested in sleeping than finding a mate. And Kyungsoo… Well, you know him. But do you see what I’m saying: the rank doesn’t make a person: they decide that for themselves.”
Sehun nods, agreeing with Chanyeol’s reasoning but his eyes still seem lost, staring out of the window like he’ll find an answer spelled out for him in the night sky. It’s never there, but the hope fluttering in his heart is what Chanyeol would do anything to protect.
“I think it’s more than just personality and experience,” he says a few days later but Chanyeol knows exactly what he’s talking about. “There’s… the instinct. But there’s also something else. Something that no one can explain, just feel. Like there’s a place they need to be, someone they need to be or be with, that is just destined for them.”
Among all of the open-mouthed smiles and high-pitched giggles, there was also an inherent melancholy that clung to the younger man. He shrugs his shoulders at it and says his common line of “but I don’t know,” before going about cleaning the dishes once more, tucking the whole conversation back into his mind, turning the page to something else entirely.
He does know and Chanyeol knows, he always knows, but now that truth is spelled right out for him in the way Sehun wraps his legs around his waist to pull him even closer, the way he’s pressing his plump ass onto his groin with utter need.
“I was destined to be with you,” spills hushed and light from Sehun’s bitten lips, Chanyeol entwining their fingers in response and kissing him softly on the lips for the first time since they had tumbled to the ground.
They are dirty and breathless and reeking of dewy grass and muddy fur and sweaty arousal but there is no place Sehun would rather be, no other way he would want Chanyeol than right here and right now. There was always something feral about his desires and untamed about his heart that made him love like this but it was a love that Chanyeol could never get enough of, that he couldn’t quite find with anyone else. Sehun was something special but it wasn’t because of some hidden hybrid or unheard of alignment that made him that way.
He is Sehun and that is the only way Chanyeol could describe the way he loves.
He squeezes their hands reassuringly once he’s positioned himself at Sehun’s hole, just pressing in a tiny bit to gauge his reaction. The embankment echoes with the unabashed groan that the younger man emits, so taken by his arousal that he’s forgotten that he is shy. His whole body is relaxed and opening up for Chanyeol, nearly swallowing him in the more that he slowly but surely slips inside.
He’s stretched so wide and his chest is heaving by the time Chanyeol’s cock is fully inside of him but he’s wriggling in his hold, hips bucking to get even closer. Having something inside of him, testing the limits of what he can take, sets a fire that licks up his spine, making the wolf inside of him howl in delight and growl out of hunger. Having Chanyeol inside of him makes his whole body sing with pleasure and his heart pound with adoration.
Chanyeol’s seen how Sehun takes to liquor like he’s drinking tap water but the only way he can describe him taking cock is utterly drunk. Wild, loose, free; like he’s riding on a buzz that makes his skin tingle and his body malleable. All of that bashfulness falls to the wayside and more often than not, Chanyeol finds himself being ridden by the other man with reckless abandon, all six feet of this gorgeous but quiet man now dropping his ass down on him sloppily, moans spilling from his mouth with each bounce of his hips.
He’s still getting used to the stretch and friction of being filled so he just writhes beneath his alpha, wrists still caged so he can’t swap their positions anyway. Chanyeol wants to savor this right now, especially after aching for it for several days. He wants to tower over Sehun, wants to watch as he shrinks underneath him, how his whole body reacts so beautifully to his every touch. He’s so responsive and Chanyeol reacts to it all, eating it up, sating the wolf that composes the core of his being.
“What does being an alpha mean to you?” he remembers Sehun asking. He’s repeated the question several times to him before and has gotten a different answer each time. Sehun loves to listen though. He especially enjoys these long talks with Chanyeol, listening attentively and patiently as Chanyeol feels himself rambling on and on. He tucks those words into his head as well, often thinking about them. He especially held close to them during the time Chanyeol was away at university.
“It means being a leader,” he answered easily when they were younger, followed quickly by, “Here, now take this and carve your name right next to mine.”
It wasn’t until they had turned in for the night that Chanyeol asked him the same thing.
“I don’t know,” was the expected response.
That answer still rings true with Sehun beneath him like this, waiting with heavy, baited breath for Chanyeol to start sliding out and back in again. He breathes heavily along the skin of Sehun’s neck, right where his beauty mark is, where he’s oh so sensitive and keens at just the slightest touch.
He’s guiding Sehun through his breathing, wanting him to accommodate to the rough and dry slide of his heavy cock filling him, again and again. Sehun hisses when Chanyeol pulls back a bit, teeth clenching, making those canines all the more prominent. Chanyeol licks at them as he slides back inside and swallows up the moan that tumbles past Sehun’s lips once he’s pressed fully back inside of him again.
Sehun swirls his hips slightly, just to have as much stimulation as he can get from this slow pace that his alpha is setting. The growl that Chanyeol places right along Sehun’s pulse point is his way of saying that he will be the one handling everything.
Sehun whines and Chanyeol is all too indulged by it.
“That’s a tough question,” he remembers answering when the ever-present alpha question is presented yet again, this time in study hall. He’s staring at his algebra textbook like it’s written in morse code while Sehun’s is long forgotten, pushed to the other side of the table to occupy a couple novels instead.
He rubs the bridge of his nose and takes a break from trying to decode equations, regarding Sehun’s quizzical look with one of his own.
“Is that an essay question now too?” he jokes and Sehun grins, nodding his head.
“Yes, I’m now your professor in hybrid studies and this essay must be on my desk, in MLA format, no later than this Friday. Understood?”
“Look at you going all PHD on me. Well, Professor, can it be an oral exam instead?” He giggles childishly and continues. “Being an alpha is a rank. Well, duh, but it’s… a pillar of our community. The people who take care of the others, get shit done.”
“Omegas care for others too. And betas, my mom’s a beta and she takes care of everything at her job and around the house,” Sehun counters. Chanyeol stares back with a blank expression.
“Hey, you’re the one who asked!” he says exasperatedly. “And anyway, I just mean in this general sense. They take care of us as a whole. Protect and serve, that kind of thing. Without everyone else, alphas would serve no purpose, ya know? And without us, everyone else would be vulnerable. So it’s… like an ecosystem. That works together. Or an equation. Or these AP classes are really starting to jumble up my brain!”
He closes his textbook with a flourish and rubs his eyes. “That’s enough studying for one day. And I’m also good on the essays there, Prof. I’ve completely flunked out.”
He was questioning a lot of things at that time: where he wanted to go to school, what he wanted to study, what exactly these feelings are that he has for his best friend. That last one he was more certain of, even then. And especially now, with their lips locked, Sehun hungrily licking into his mouth as Chanyeol sets a slow but steady rhythm thrusting into him, he is entirely certain.
The way Sehun’s slick skin feels along his lips as he trails bites down his neck and how his round ass presses against his hipbones with each thrust, making Sehun moan each time, has Chanyeol growing more excited by the second. He’s leaking precum almost as heavily as his boyfriend now, making the slide in easier, allowing him to go rougher and faster: just the way he knows Sehun likes it.
Chanyeol plants his palms into the dirt for more leverage to pick up speed and with his hands now loosened from the other’s grip, Sehun is grasping onto his back. Chanyeol growls low and deep when Sehun rakes his nails along his skin, digging into him, marking him further. He’s practically panting like a dog when it spurs Chanyeol to put more strength behind his thrusts. He’s still going at the same slow, steady speed but now he’s pushing in deeper, rougher, each thrust making Sehun’s ass jiggle and his whole body jolt from his ministrations.
Sehun’s eyes are clenched tight and the look on his face is reverent, like he wouldn’t be content anywhere else in the world, like the only place he felt where he belonged was right under Chanyeol like this. He didn’t need to voice that, though several times when he’s been in this blissed out state before he has rambled on and on about it breathlessly. Just that look, the way his body molded against Chanyeol’s, how in tune they were with each other like one could start a sentence and the other could finish it showed Chanyeol that this is where he belonged too.
“What does this mean to you?” Sehun asks him as he sits on the deck.
It’s dusk and their friends had scattered to continue their night out on the town. Sehun solemnly stated that he was feeling a bit ill but Chanyeol knows the real reason why he’s opted to stay home.
He knows exactly what he’s asking as well because Sehun keeps rubbing at his neck self-consciously, right where a hickey hasn’t quite faded along it. Everyone had pointed it out and Chanyeol’s eyes bugged out at all the questions. No one knew that they were dating, both because of their alpha status but also because of their close friendship. He could hear Junmyeon practically scolding him already, not only bringing up mating but posing that they may not be ready to be at this level with each other. His guidance was well-meaning but too often delivered without sensitivity, Chanyeol had to admit that.
He was an anxious, rattling mess himself but he knew how badly things got to Sehun, how he would shrink. Chanyeol could withstand pain, rejection, ridicule: he would put on a smile and bear through it, and even though it was fake, it still got him to the other side so he could actually mean it again.
But Sehun, he would run and hide. He would curl into himself and not let anyone inside, not let himself outside. Moods like this could go on for months depending on the situation and when it came to his closest friends thoughts, he held them so highly that their disappointment could make him drop all too far.
“It means--” but before Chanyeol could even answer, Sehun whispered in a steely tone.
“Leadership. Taking care of others. Getting shit done?” He was still staring out into the distance, at the stretch of wilderness laid out before him.
He looked like he was about to take off sprinting but Chanyeol’s words made him freeze.
“It means I have you.”
Sehun looks over to him once the weight of his words settle, his eyes glistening, his mouth slightly parted in question and in awe.
“I don’t know what being an alpha means, I don’t know why I am one, why you or anyone is. I just don’t know. But if being an alpha means I get to have you, claim you, call you mine: then that’s all I need. You’re all I need.”
Sehun is too struck by his words to speak but Chanyeol can still see the lingering questions in his eyes, that constant searching.
“And it means I also get to be yours.”
There will be more than a small hickey that the two of them will be sporting today. Chanyeol especially intends on illustrating all over Sehun’s body that he is his and only his and when those nails make another bumpy trip down the curve of his spine, he knows he’ll be thoroughly claimed as well. This gets Sehun off nearly as much as the fucking does: these reminders that he can see and feel all day, these marks like love poems bore into his skin to show that he is here and he is loved and he belongs.
This is why he likes the rough, hasty sex as well, the burn and ache it leaves him with, that he can ruminate in for days until he whines and bends over and asks for it again. He likes the spent feeling, the exertion of energy, and soaking up all of the energy that Chanyeol directs towards him as well.
He’s greedy for it but so is Chanyeol.
He’s shivering against Sehun’s fingertips and it makes Sehun think of those words, his alpha’s words, telling him that Sehun is his. And telling him that he is Sehun’s as well. Sometimes he’s surprised, especially now, when he remembers that he is an alpha. And not only that, an alpha with a claim over another.
Chanyeol is thrusting into him faster now, catching deliciously on his rim and just dancing around the sweet spot he knows so well inside of him, but it’s not enough stimulation and not where Sehun needs it right now. His cock feels heavier against his stomach, painfully ignored and when he grips onto it, it has him hissing and baring his teeth in response.
Before Chanyeol can even get out the words to ask if he’s okay and needs any help, that wild spark is ignited again between them. Sehun nearly tackles the taller man, making him lurch forward, so close to where the water touches soil that the curly locks on the back of his head have become damp.
The change of position is not so he could ride him, like he had been expecting. Instead, his cock slides out of that tight heat he was buried into and flops back against his stomach. He whines, wanting that snugness back but Sehun utterly devours the sound, rutting his thoroughly soaked cock along Chanyeol’s gracelessly, fueled heatedly by his wolf.
Sehun is not as adept in dealing with his ruts like Chanyeol is. Having not only age but also experience over the other man, Chanyeol can more easily move past them and make sense of his instincts in a more orderly fashion. Sehun, however, is a creature fueled entirely by emotion and when having this much trust in the other, he can express them without holding back.
The first time he had been inside Chanyeol, he couldn’t even speak. Chanyeol even had to remind him to breathe because all that Sehun could focus on was wet hot tight. All he could even think was mine.
Chanyeol is his, not only on the marks Sehun writes along his skin or the kisses he trails down the length of his body: he has claimed Chanyeol inside and out. And now that he has slid his cock in as deep as it can go, making Chanyeol throw his head back on a long, drawn out moan, he doesn’t think he’ll ever want to leave. He could make a home inside of him if Chanyeol so wished it.
A harsh whisper of “move” from Chanyeol’s already wrecked voice has Sehun snapping into action, spurred on by the other man’s instructions. He’s so taken by the feeling, the tightness around him, how it just feels so right inside of him that he chases that feeling, rutting into him at a pace already so fast and frenzied. It makes Chanyeol gasp, grabbing onto Sehun’s hips with a bruising grip that makes him still, gazing over Chanyeol’s lust-blown face for any signs of discomfort.
All he can manage to say is “Fuck, too good. Please. I just need to. Take a breath.”
He’s panting, his sweat glistening in the moonlight, and Sehun can’t help but lick a bead of it that has just traveled down Chanyeol’s temple. It makes the other man groan, canting his hips to set his own pace, wanting to last so he can have more of Sehun inside of him, more time to savor this. His voice is deep, rumbling his chest from where Sehun has his own pressed against him, when he requests Sehun to take him.
And oh he does, making Chanyeol yelp as he’s turned over onto his stomach, hips lifted into the air so Sehun can mount him and pound away like he’s wanted to since he’s first experienced how difficult going through a rut could be. And ever since he’s noticed how absolutely delectable Chanyeol’s hips and thighs were, wondering how they’d look with his teeth marks adorning them.
Rubbing their cocks together like this feels a bit like fooling around for the first time and Chanyeol appreciates how it gives him this fluttering feeling, like they’ve snuck off from class to do this, but all he can really focus on is that he needs more. He can feel Sehun holding back, biting his lip hard to keep the alpha inside him from roaring out of him. But that is exactly what Chanyeol needs.
He’s spreading his legs obscenely, presenting himself to his alpha in a way that makes Sehun’s breath catch in his throat. No matter how often he’ll get to see Chanyeol like this, how many times he’s had Chanyeol exactly like this before, he still can’t fully digest how immensely beautiful and alluring and sexy he is like this.
All that thunders within his usually over-crowded mind is that Chanyeol is his.
He’s spitting into his hand hastily and rubbing it along the length of his cock along with his precum, so aroused that it slicks him up quite thoroughly. Chanyeol isn’t as experienced in receiving as Sehun is but he’s quick to learn and talented at most things he picks up. He’s also incredibly giving and holds his legs up to his chest so Sehun can sink more easily into his hole.
For all that Sehun is teeming with desire, wanting nothing more than to fill Chanyeol completely, he takes his time and carefully watches his face for any sign of discomfort. His gaze is so intense it makes Chanyeol throw his head back and groan, pulling at his neck to kiss Sehun roughly and whisper impatiently: “All of it. I want it all.”
That is all Sehun needs to hear before he’s thrusting roughly into the man beneath him, pressing in so deeply and deliberately on the bundle of nerves that makes Chanyeol scream out in pure pleasure that it has him moaning just as loudly. He’s rutting into him more than anything, quickly and desperately pressing the head of his cock on Chanyeol’s sweet spot again and again to stimulate them both. He pants and writhes from the ministrations, his leaking cock twitching on his stomach. That definitely catches Sehun’s attention and makes him even more bold.
Flipping them over to his preferred position, he has Chanyeol on his knees very quickly. Sehun rarely shows his strength, being a man of mostly composure and gentleness, but it serves a purpose here. And makes Chanyeol even more turned on than he possibly thought he could be. Sehun is draped fully over his back, a hand pressing on Chanyeol’s chest to make them even closer before gliding down to wrap around his swollen cock.
Sehun bites on his neck roughly, spilling whimpers into his skin as his seeking hips try to find Chanyeol’s hole once again so he can get back to the warmth and tightness of it, the only place he can even think about being at this moment. He’s so swept by his haste and need for it that he drags his length along the cleft of Chanyeol’s ass several times before finally slipping into his slick opening in one deliberate thrust.
They both groan at that, Chanyeol’s voice getting deeper and more wrecked now that his alpha has mounted him and is pounding into him roughly. There’s something so unique about the way Sehun gets intimate with him that takes Chanyeol’s breath away and he knows it’s not only because his best friend is the only one he has even thought of having sex with. It obviously differs from the way Chanyeol pleasures him but that is what makes it wonderful, the contrast.
There’s just something so feral yet demure, so inexperienced but genuine about the way Sehun fucks him and the only way he’s ever been able to put his finger on it is that even with his cock buried deep inside of him, Sehun is still aching to be good. He’s growling into his ear and biting on the lobe harshly, pistoning in and out of Chanyeol hurriedly, and pressing his body further into the dirt the closer he gets to his orgasm but it’s all for Chanyeol, to show him just how good he can be as a boyfriend, as a lover, as his alpha. His groans and grunts of instruction still taper off into whines and whimpers and silent pleas for praise and encouragement.
“So fucking good,” Chanyeol breathes out huskily. His voice always seems to lower when he’s being fucked like this, giving it a gravelly texture that makes Sehun twitch inside of him before snapping his hips even faster.
He knows he’s close because he can’t help babbling when he’s this turned on, when he can feel it all building in his gut, in his groin, all ready to release deep inside of the one he’s claimed, and in the process claiming him all over again. Just the thought makes Sehun’s heart pound nearly out of his chest, has him spilling words and biting frantically all along Chanyeol’s shoulders.
“So tight for me, fuck. I want you so badly, I need you so badly, gotta come inside, please say I can, please I need to come inside of you. Fuck, I have so much come for you,” his words run together until all he can do is whine the word “please” over and over again.
He’s grinding his cock inside of Chanyeol moreso than thrusting now, staving off his orgasm until he hears those words from Chanyeol, those orders from his alpha to release it all inside of him. In the spirit of their teasing, Chanyeol decides to wait, baiting Sehun to edge just a little closer with each cant of his hips but to not tumble into the instinct he so desperately wants to overtake him. It isn’t until Chanyeol has come all over the muddy ground and Sehun’s hand, still rubbing over his sensitive cock, that he reaches an arm back to grab at Sehun’s hair, bringing him closer to whisper “Now. Come inside me now, please alpha, I want your come inside of me.”
Sehun practically howls as he buries himself as far as he can get inside of Chanyeol and fills him with warmth, not letting a drop of his come seep out of his hole as his still very hard cock remains inside of him. The groans he makes as he comes down from his high are definitely not human and Chanyeol shivers at the feeling of his voice so close to his ear, lips feather light against his skin.
Everything is usually quiet for Chanyeol after he comes: he feels loose and relaxed, at the peak of contentment with both him and his wolf sated. He’s finally gotten past the hardest point of his rut and now he can just enjoy this closeness, this wave of pleasure feeling like a warm bath he can just sink into and bask in for what feels like forever.
He can’t explain it, but sometimes, when he comes as hard as he just did, it feels like he has this newfound sense of clarity: able to feel the world, take it as it is, and feel like everything is right within it. Only for this one fleeting moment, of course, but he is okay with that, accepts it, lets himself just get swept away by it before he can catch his breath and settle down comfortably yet again.
“What made you decide to stay?” Sehun’s voice is but a whisper piercing into the dark, rousing Chanyeol from his light slumber. It’s the first night since he’s gotten back from university, informing everyone that he would not be going back for a second year. His welcoming soon became an interrogation and everyone was trying to get an answer for the exact question Sehun just posed.
It’s the first time he has voiced it, however, and that makes Chanyeol sit up in bed, regarding Sehun with wide eyes. The younger man is still laying still, trying to look directly at the ceiling as to not make his tears any more obvious than they should already be. It’s been nearly a year since he has slept in this bed and the familiarity of it is what is making him cry more than anything.
It is the most welcome he has felt in a while and just the fact that this feels so right has him hurting so badly. He can’t even form a complete thought as to why without his heart breaking but it doesn’t make the fear any less palpable or present: it’s because he doesn’t know if the closest thing that’s felt like home could be taken away just as swiftly as it had before.
And part of him wonders if he even deserves a place to call home when he’s putting that exact title onto a person instead.
“Forget about it,” he chokes out, turning over in bed so he can let the sobs building inside of him flow more freely, shielded by the dark like this. His body is racking with each whimper that he bites back, willing himself to stay strong, stay silent, just like everyone expects of a grown up, a man, an alpha.
He was never built for this and he knows it, admitting it to himself now rather than tucking it away like all of the other disappointments he feels like he’s become. It feels like it’s all tumbling out of him at once and he can’t bear it, can feel his whole world shattering just like the day Chanyeol left.
Only he’s right here, in bed with him, so close that he can see him and feel him and smell him but he can’t let himself have him, wouldn’t dare to just reach out and take, even though every instinct and hunger and need is telling him to make Chanyeol his, just as he’s already given himself to Chanyeol before he could even dream up of what being an alpha really means.
He feels arms around him and he stills, not knowing whether to turn away from them or settle into their embrace just like he always yearns to. He finds his heart to be weak and too quickly rests against Chanyeol’s chest that presses into his back. Biting his lip as harshly as he can without breaking skin just to stifle his sobs, he can’t help but whimper once a hand gently, lovingly, caresses down his tear-stained cheek, dances over his neck and collarbone, and makes its way back up again in a soothing pattern. His breathing matches the rhythm and catches in his throat once he can feel Chanyeol’s mouth press against his ear, just breathing lightly, showing Sehun exactly what to do, soothingly lulling him back to the calm that Chanyeol’s presence often gives him.
“The reason,” he whispers with certainty along Sehun’s ear, delighting in the shivers he is met with. “That I decided to even leave. The reason that my dumb ass thought was a good idea to leave everything I’ve known to go to a college that wasn’t even my first choice, to take a course I absolutely hated, and sit through lectures that made me bored out of my mind.”
“I,” Sehun starts, so confused by what his friend is going on about, but a hand along his neck, just firmly placed along his throat, has him exhaling sharply and listening even more intently.
“The reason that I dropped everything there, left those shitty 4x4 dorm rooms and overpriced lunches and textbooks written by privileged assholes and came back here, to where my family has grown up for generations, have raised me right alongside people who understand me, where my name is carved or scrawled out on damn near everywhere I could get my hands on. The reason I am even laying in this bed right now is because of you.”
Sehun gasps, his pulse thundering so loud against his eardrum that it mixes with Chanyeol’s voice and steady breath, sounding like a song he could never listen to enough.
“The reason I am staying, the reason I will always stay, is you. It’s always been you.”
They’ve said “I love you” to each other about a million times before, for the most part unironically, but it’s all that Sehun can think to say at this moment. He can’t seem to form a word though, all he can do is breathe heavily and gasp each time he can feel Chanyeol’s breath along his skin.
He wants to shift, his wolf is howling inside of him like he’s caged and he aches to release him, to feel the most content and capable in his body that he can be because at this moment he feels like he could fall at any moment.
But his wolf also knows, at the core of his being, that he won’t ever fall when he has Chanyeol there to catch him.
“The reason I will always stay is because I am your alpha.”
Sehun feels every doubt he’s ever had leaving on each exhale. He opens his eyes and stares into the darkness of the familiar room with newfound clarity, with contentment. This just feels so right.
This feels like home.
“And because you are my alpha as well.”
Title: The meaning of mine
Pairing: Chanyeol/Sehun
Rating: NC-17
Length: 9.2k
Summary: Sehun always poses the question (and Chanyeol always provides an answer)
Warnings: semi-public sex, switching, biting, marking, the tiniest bit of edging, one mention of alcohol, lots of angst
Author’s note: i am so happy that i could be a part of this exchange. all of the prompts i received were absolutely wonderful, it was difficult choosing which one to work on first. sadly, due to irl circumstances, the second fic i had been working on could not be completed in time to submit to this exchange (i just had so many ideas for it!) so i hope you enjoy this fic and i will be happy to gift you the second fic once i have finished it. this, as things often do, started out with smut but quickly turned into angst. i hope you enjoy it!
Sehun has been teasing him all day.
Not teasing in the schoolyard sense, though sometimes they do that as well. It’s playful banter and good-natured tussles most of the time. But today, he is teasing him in a much more suggestive manner: brushing along him when passing him in the hallway, draping himself over his back when reaching for something in a cupboard, resting his hand on his thigh when he was just leaning over for the remote.
It’s the kind of teasing that makes Chanyeol’s blood pump loudly in his ears and when he wakes up to see Sehun completely naked and standing near the dresser with a cup of coffee in hand like he’s just casually lounging, Chanyeol decides that this little game has reached a fever pitch.
“Well good morning to you,” he greets, his gaze naturally traveling along all of Sehun’s exposed body.
Sehun always looks so soft in the morning, so small. His hair would be a mess from rubbing it into the pillow and his lips shiny from drool. He would blush at that, covering his face with blankets and making Chanyeol look away because “wah~ I’m not pretty just yet, give me time to wake up and freshen up!”
But with the way he’s standing tall, the muscles in his right leg defined as he puts his weight on it and rests his toned back along the dresser, he looks strong. He looks like an alpha and Chanyeol needs to rub at his eyes and wake himself up a little more for it to fully sink in that he is.
And not only that, but he’s his alpha.
Chanyeol rolls out of bed and takes the sheet with him, wrapping it over his back and looking like the complete opposite of his boyfriend right now. Sehun chuckles and wraps him in a hug before he can even make it to the bathroom.
“Good morning to you too,” he says cheerfully and even though it’s early, Chanyeol smiles back as bright as the sun.
He turns and then there is that damn tease again, in the form of Sehun’s cock pressed against his thigh. He is slightly hard and he can’t blame it on morning wood like Chanyeol can. And that giggle that he emits in return to Chanyeol facing him is not doing much to make him seem innocent.
“You’re absolutely ridiculous,” he informs him, his voice coming out a little scratchy and rough from just having woken up.
“The day hasn’t even started yet!” He says in defense and before he can pick his mug back up to take another sip of coffee, Chanyeol is backing him into the side of the bed and bringing them both down to flop on top of it.
Sehun yips in surprise but then he’s laughing hard, playfully pushing at Chanyeol’s chest and arms, wriggling and giggling so much that his broad chest is heaving and his boyfriend can’t help but stare at it. From the way his skin is still supple from sleep and completely covered in their shared scent, Chanyeol knows that he hasn’t gone for a run yet and he thinks it would be a good idea for them to go now, if only to release some of this leftover adrenaline from the day prior.
Of course he would want to release it inside of his gorgeous and utterly naked boyfriend right now but he’s been going through a bit of a rut himself: he’s an alpha as well. It creates an interesting, though also exasperating, dynamic between them. And sometimes a conflicting one when natural instinct begins to top practicality.
Sehun has been getting the itch as well, going as far as rutting against furniture he walks past and grinding down on the mattress in his sleep. Of course Chanyeol has noticed it, how the alpha in Sehun aches to bury itself deep inside a mate, but then there is that teasing that coincides with it. There’s that delectable ass that Sehun sticks out and flaunts off as he sways with each step and he aches for that to be filled too, stretched out and leaking from his alpha.
It’s contradictory and exciting and frustrating all at once and Chanyeol just wants to clear his mind, get some exercise in before he settles into the day just so he won’t be teeming with untended to hormones for the whole duration of his weekend.
He pecks a kiss on Sehun’s lips and can pick up on the whine emitting from them when he stands up instead of leaning into it. Chanyeol holds onto his hands and helps him out of bed, still holding onto them as he asks “How about a run?”
Sehun is beaming as he replies. “Of course. Go freshen up first, I’ll meet you at the deck.”
He makes his way to the door, that plump ass of his bouncing with each step and it makes Chanyeol call out, “Will you be wearing clothes on this adventure?”
“Nope. I plan on shifting.”
Good, Chanyeol wants to say. He had the same plan in mind.
He hums an affirmative before heading to the bathroom.
When he reaches the back deck, Sehun is still just as bare as the day he was born and leaning against the railing, staring out at the vast expanse of land that awaits them. Their area is pertained entirely of wolf hybrids who have resided on these same grounds generations before them. This is where they would have birthday parties together, would sit around the bonfire and play hide and seek and share their first innocent, curious kiss while lazing in the shade of the biggest, tallest tree they’ve ever seen. They’ve shared many more kisses since then and when Sehun turns to face him with a warm smile and blush heading south, Chanyeol finds that far less innocent ones will comprise his near future.
That warm smile turns mischievous when Sehun says out of nowhere, “Race you to the creek!”
He’s sprinting off before Chanyeol has even processed his words but he catches on quickly, long legs running two steps at a time down the stairs of the deck and off into the wilderness ahead, the wilderness they know so well.
Twigs snap underfoot and they pass the tree that holds their carved initials. Chanyeol’s sight often lands to the toned, lean body before him as they sprint towards their goal. Sehun is nothing short of marvelous from head to toe, always having a natural beauty to him. He looks rather similar to how he’s always looked, only now much taller and broader, with sharp features that soften each time he smiles. Chanyeol stares closely at the muscles that he’s built as well, admiring how they shift under his beautiful skin.
And then Sehun is actually shifting, gorgeous sunny skin breaking away under the canopy of trees to reveal fur. His muscles and bones shift, his back hunching as he lunges forward and breaks into an even faster run on all fours once his wolf has been freed and is open to the still damp but sunny morning air.
Chanyeol follows that lead, is spurred on by it. When he lunges down onto his front legs it is almost in an effort to catch the wolf that he is chasing, who he is, with all the rationality left underneath the roar of his instincts, letting win this little game rather than trapping him beneath his paws now caked with dirt and snapping branches.
With the beast in him now fully overtaking, he is less generous with the distance he had been keeping, sprinting past Sehun with a newfound speed and urgency that often courses through him when he has just shifted. His tongue lulls from his open mouth as he thunders on and he can practically taste the freshwater creek not far off, picking up on the sound of the babbling stream.
Sehun proves to be a formidable opponent, however, when he catches up to Chanyeol rather quickly and meets him at the edge of the embankment seconds after the older wolf has already reached it. This is a familiar area for them, the scent of wolf strongly lingering in the air. It provides a sense of comfort to the two, a place that they can always go to, letting loose what is usually tucked away inside of them to make room for their daily life.
Sehun had always been more keen on shifting out of all the other hybrid kids their age. He didn’t explain this, or rather couldn’t, but Chanyeol knew it was because sometimes the only way Sehun could express himself was with his wolf. He wasn’t expected to speak when he was shifted, lacked the ability to obviously, and so he didn’t need to search for the right words to say. There was a simplicity to this that Sehun often reveled in and Chanyeol had to agree that he felt it too. In troubling times, he always had his wolf that he could rely on.
Living side by side with a horny alpha who just so happened to be his boyfriend was not the most troubling of circumstances but it did directly affect the instincts that now took front and center within him, so Chanyeol was aching to shift. With his long tongue poking out as he smiled, he took joy in being able to run free like this.
It made him so joyful all over that he couldn’t help but trot over to Sehun and bump his snout into his, leaning back on his haunches so he can paw at the soft fur around his neck.
Sehun sniffles back at him, pawing at his own nose that had grown wet from Chanyeol’s pressing against it. Chanyeol took this as an opportunity to pounce on the other playfully, making them both tumble to the ground that had grown wet from morning dew and the creek that streamed along nearby. Yelping, Sehun regained his footing only to tackle Chanyeol, holding onto him so they could both roll around on the muddy embankment together.
That was another great thing about shifting like this: it allowed them to be carefree. Now, they were wolves with absolutely no worries: no prey lurked in these woods and haven’t for generations. Tucked into their own personal paradise like this, they could prance and play and paw at each other all that they wanted without having to think about work or bills or the very unconventional pairing that they make.
They could act like little wolf pups again and wrestle around like they used to, and that they sometimes find themselves still doing now. They aren’t as gentle with their lunges, however. They know each other’s boundaries, know exactly what the other can take and know that their wolf can take even more. Their majestic forms are quickly becoming muddy and the thuds they make when landing on the ground are loud. They are having the most fun in weeks though, panting happily and licking at each other fondly.
It begins to escalate when those licks turn into nips and their tackling becomes just a bit harsher, sending them tussling and growling and rolling all around the embankment. A particular hard shove from Sehun sends Chanyeol scuttling onto the ground roughly, a loud whimper of surprise echoing through the expanse of the creek making all of the birds perched atop the trees squawk and take off all at once.
It also has Chanyeol so surprised that he suddenly shifts out of his wolf form and rolls over onto his back, eyes nearly bulging. Sehun shifts seamlessly once he sees his boyfriend on the ground, closing the distance between them quickly to see if there’s anything wrong, worry written all over his face. Before he can voice his concerns, though, Chanyeol is chuckling again and pulling on the other man’s arm so he falls to the ground with him, continuing their little sparring match.
With renewed vigor and a particularly high-pitched laugh, Sehun grips onto him tightly and sends them rolling again so Chanyeol is no longer on his back. There’s just a light scrape along his leg that is mostly covered in dirt and a leaf mixed in with his curly hair so he isn’t as worried as he was, just enjoying being this close to his boyfriend and having this much fun. The close proximity and distance from their busy weeks is exactly what he’s been needing and when they have rolled over several times more, Sehun knows exactly why.
In their haste to be the one with the upper hand, one of Chanyeol’s long legs gets tangled with Sehun’s own, resting between them. Sehun suddenly goes lax beneath the other man, making Chanyeol fall forward, pressing that much closer to his already sensitive body.
That was another thing about shifting that they hadn’t really thought through: how it made their skin tingle, their senses heighten, and their hormones that much stronger once they’ve shifted back.
Sehun doesn’t notice he’s hard until a moan escapes his mouth and he’s quick to try and swallow it back up, but it’s already out in the open air before he can. Chanyeol’s face is inches from his, his body shaking from how unexpectedly erotic the other man sounds. With a palm planted onto the ground on either side of Sehun’s head, Chanyeol has him perfectly caged, every inch of his supple, responsive body his for the taking. And of course Sehun is offering it, has been for the past week, or few days if he’s being generous, but with the way Sehun’s eyes are lust blown and lidded he decides that he wants to be greedy.
It isn’t so much the kiss that follows that has Sehun surprised, but moreso how harshly and desperately that it is given. He returns it fervently, however, grasping at Chanyeol’s skin and dragging him down to get even closer. That has his arms giving out and him flailing into Sehun’s embrace, continuing their rough play from earlier even as he slips his tongue into the younger man’s mouth.
They roll around once more so Sehun is now settled on top, holding Chanyeol’s face with both hands so he can deepen the kiss, hungrily licking his way into his mouth. The grip that finds its way around his hips just goads him on, has him grinding just the slightest bit onto Chanyeol’s lap and that’s really when he has had enough.
With a growl that has Sehun gasping, Chanyeol is tossing them over once more so he can have the little tease fully underneath him, so he can indulge him in what they have both been wanting to do for what feels like a lifetime.
He’s nipping at his neck but it is anything but light and playful: it serves a purpose. It is an extension of the pulse that now thunders underneath his skin and he is spelling out with his canines what it is roaring to him: mine, mine, mine.
It is not met with the expected demureness of the other wolf now in his grasp, the beautiful creature in his arms not slipping into submission. Instead, as Chanyeol was so focused on his task of marking, Sehun takes this opportunity to flip their positions, to roll his alpha onto his back with a thud before he proceeds to do the same.
Chanyeol notices those canines of his often, how they subtly peek out of Sehun’s mouth, pressing slightly on his full lips when he grins or giggles to himself. He admires them in a way that is indescribable, regards them in a way that leaves his mouth smiling but his brows furrowed. Sehun’s mouth often leaves him scrambling and he can’t decide whether he wants it hanging open on a moan or baring his teeth in a growl.
Greedily, Chanyeol decides once a mark has thoroughly been made on his neck and Sehun kisses it tenderly the next moment, that he wants both.
He wants it all.
The yip that gets stuck in Sehun’s throat when Chanyeol grips his hair and pulls him into a bruising kiss is utterly delicious and the wolf in him can’t help but nip and paw at the other alpha. In his haste, they go tumbling on the embankment, rolling so that Chanyeol is atop him one moment only to be pinned by the younger man the next.
There’s something strangely nostalgic about the way they tussle about, like young boys wrestling with each other playfully. As young wolf pups, they would shift out here when their control and precision with it wasn’t as skilled as it is now, when the instincts within them were a driving force more than a subtle intuition. They would yip and snarl and gnaw excitedly with a whole big world right in their backyard to explore and they did so together. Memories of them doing exactly that were coming back to him as strongly as the pheromones permeating between them.
Of course, it wasn’t exactly like this. Chanyeol didn’t even entertain the idea of being this close to his best friend until his first summer home from university, when he decided he would be staying after all. The distance from the boy he had grown up with and seeing the man he was rapidly becoming just from his few semesters away made his heart tug with this familiar yearning. And now, being more mature and experienced, he could put a name to that feeling.
Sehun’s name, that is.
Rank and instinct aside, that boy could be stubborn and had always known that he didn’t want Chanyeol to belong to anyone else. Chanyeol had always known that as well, but was just too scared to let himself think about it let alone voice it, worrying that if he did it would drastically change the bond that they had.
He’s thankful for his big heart and loud mouth now: his dramatic confession of love was what made that bond become even stronger, after all.
It was right here where he told him he would be leaving for school and it was right here where he informed him he was going to stay. Both times, Sehun had cried. He tried to hide it but the moonlight playing along his skin, making his tears twinkle like stars, made it obvious to Chanyeol.
The other families that live amongst them, long lines of generations that have grown side by side in this neck of the woods, have often joked that Sehun has even more hidden inside him than just wolf. A bit strange and hard to understand, especially as a child, he was often teased that if he tried hard enough, he could shift into something different entirely.
“Yeah, like an alien,” some of the other kids would say.
Sehun would cry then too and run off to a little alcove tucked near the creek, squeezing himself into the small bit of shelter that it was so he could cry or whimper in solitude. It was different from the clenching in his jaw and distant eyes that Chanyeol had been met with upon presenting his acceptance letter. There was a coldness, a resistance in it that made the older boy shiver; almost like he was using all of his strength to hold back the tears, like he could just burst if he held back any longer.
Intense emotions could cause shifts as well and being a child that hasn’t yet learned how to deal with or make sense of them, young wolf hybrids would uncontrollably shift often due to tantrums. Sehun was a boy who knew this all too well, his wolf being a place of comfort and contentment for him during those young, troubling years.
He was also a creature of habit so when Chanyeol was all packed up to drive further north, where the large and historic university resided, he didn’t have to pick up on his friend’s scent to find him tucked into that alcove again. Now with his long, spindly legs tucked close to his chest, he still looked as small as ever.
“This isn’t goodbye,” Chanyeol said. Sehun squeezed his eyes shut but listened closely all the same. “This is: I’ll see you later and I’ll be back soon.”
It still wasn’t soon enough if the way Sehun now grips tightly to Chanyeol’s body and refuses to let go has anything to say about it. His deep kisses and harsh tugs on Chanyeol’s lower lip, that nearly draws blood, pulls him out of his reminiscing and places him on his back once more. Sehun is grinding his hips down onto him with earnest, a feral haste to his movements that are still deliberate, that say stay right here.
Always yearning to give the other boy what he so desires, Chanyeol is nearly tempted to listen to the alpha’s silent but powerful call. Only his own is bubbling so rapidly under the surface that he can’t help but grab at Sehun’s wrists and dig them into the ground above his head, making his mouth fall open in surprise, eyes wide as they stare into the other’s.
His gaze is intense and oh, there are Sehun’s eyes twinkling back at him again, only his pupils are so blown out from arousal that Chanyeol doesn’t even have to press his hips down to know that Sehun has hastily become wet everywhere.
Once their bodies press close, deliberately from the older alpha between them as Sehun stays pinned from that gaze alone, Chanyeol can feel how much Sehun’s cock is leaking, making both of their abdomens damp and sticky.
Sehun has always loved the rawness and friction most, begging and whimpering to Chanyeol to make him “really feel it” by tossing the lube aside and bending over obscenely. There’s just something that had always excited him about the idea of skin on skin, of feeling the stretch and pull and burn that would leave him aching for days on end afterwards. He craved it and when he had sunk himself deep into Chanyeol in return for the first time, he finally understood it: it came from a desire to feel wanted, a need to belong. He would have fallen asleep with himself still tucked inside of Chanyeol if he could keep himself hard for that long.
“Could someone be both alpha and omega?” he posed to Chanyeol one night. After the rough fucking and tender spooning, existential conversations always followed: it was just how the two operated and they wouldn’t have it any other way.
“I don’t think it works that way,” Chanyeol replied. His family was casual about traditions where Sehun’s was strict but he was still nearly certain that something as solid as their very ranks was something unchangeable.
He turns over on his side and regards Sehun’s face in the darkness, still able to make out his sharp features that his warm heart softened. His look was pensive now, searching. Chanyeol always knew the man’s questions would far outnumber his statements.
“There is alpha and beta and omega, but there is still more than just that,” Chanyeol continued. Sehun regarded him with furrowed brows but there was more to what Chanyeol was saying. “There is you and there is me. And there is Junmyeon who lives down the street, and Jongin who we went to school with, and Kyungsoo who always gets your food for you at parties. Do you see what I’m trying to say?”
“I know who our friends are, Chanyeol,” Sehun replies, deadpan. He giggles when Chanyeol tosses a pillow on his face.
“What I mean is that different people act differently. Junmyeon is an omega but still bosses us around like a mother hen. Jongin is an alpha who is more interested in sleeping than finding a mate. And Kyungsoo… Well, you know him. But do you see what I’m saying: the rank doesn’t make a person: they decide that for themselves.”
Sehun nods, agreeing with Chanyeol’s reasoning but his eyes still seem lost, staring out of the window like he’ll find an answer spelled out for him in the night sky. It’s never there, but the hope fluttering in his heart is what Chanyeol would do anything to protect.
“I think it’s more than just personality and experience,” he says a few days later but Chanyeol knows exactly what he’s talking about. “There’s… the instinct. But there’s also something else. Something that no one can explain, just feel. Like there’s a place they need to be, someone they need to be or be with, that is just destined for them.”
Among all of the open-mouthed smiles and high-pitched giggles, there was also an inherent melancholy that clung to the younger man. He shrugs his shoulders at it and says his common line of “but I don’t know,” before going about cleaning the dishes once more, tucking the whole conversation back into his mind, turning the page to something else entirely.
He does know and Chanyeol knows, he always knows, but now that truth is spelled right out for him in the way Sehun wraps his legs around his waist to pull him even closer, the way he’s pressing his plump ass onto his groin with utter need.
“I was destined to be with you,” spills hushed and light from Sehun’s bitten lips, Chanyeol entwining their fingers in response and kissing him softly on the lips for the first time since they had tumbled to the ground.
They are dirty and breathless and reeking of dewy grass and muddy fur and sweaty arousal but there is no place Sehun would rather be, no other way he would want Chanyeol than right here and right now. There was always something feral about his desires and untamed about his heart that made him love like this but it was a love that Chanyeol could never get enough of, that he couldn’t quite find with anyone else. Sehun was something special but it wasn’t because of some hidden hybrid or unheard of alignment that made him that way.
He is Sehun and that is the only way Chanyeol could describe the way he loves.
He squeezes their hands reassuringly once he’s positioned himself at Sehun’s hole, just pressing in a tiny bit to gauge his reaction. The embankment echoes with the unabashed groan that the younger man emits, so taken by his arousal that he’s forgotten that he is shy. His whole body is relaxed and opening up for Chanyeol, nearly swallowing him in the more that he slowly but surely slips inside.
He’s stretched so wide and his chest is heaving by the time Chanyeol’s cock is fully inside of him but he’s wriggling in his hold, hips bucking to get even closer. Having something inside of him, testing the limits of what he can take, sets a fire that licks up his spine, making the wolf inside of him howl in delight and growl out of hunger. Having Chanyeol inside of him makes his whole body sing with pleasure and his heart pound with adoration.
Chanyeol’s seen how Sehun takes to liquor like he’s drinking tap water but the only way he can describe him taking cock is utterly drunk. Wild, loose, free; like he’s riding on a buzz that makes his skin tingle and his body malleable. All of that bashfulness falls to the wayside and more often than not, Chanyeol finds himself being ridden by the other man with reckless abandon, all six feet of this gorgeous but quiet man now dropping his ass down on him sloppily, moans spilling from his mouth with each bounce of his hips.
He’s still getting used to the stretch and friction of being filled so he just writhes beneath his alpha, wrists still caged so he can’t swap their positions anyway. Chanyeol wants to savor this right now, especially after aching for it for several days. He wants to tower over Sehun, wants to watch as he shrinks underneath him, how his whole body reacts so beautifully to his every touch. He’s so responsive and Chanyeol reacts to it all, eating it up, sating the wolf that composes the core of his being.
“What does being an alpha mean to you?” he remembers Sehun asking. He’s repeated the question several times to him before and has gotten a different answer each time. Sehun loves to listen though. He especially enjoys these long talks with Chanyeol, listening attentively and patiently as Chanyeol feels himself rambling on and on. He tucks those words into his head as well, often thinking about them. He especially held close to them during the time Chanyeol was away at university.
“It means being a leader,” he answered easily when they were younger, followed quickly by, “Here, now take this and carve your name right next to mine.”
It wasn’t until they had turned in for the night that Chanyeol asked him the same thing.
“I don’t know,” was the expected response.
That answer still rings true with Sehun beneath him like this, waiting with heavy, baited breath for Chanyeol to start sliding out and back in again. He breathes heavily along the skin of Sehun’s neck, right where his beauty mark is, where he’s oh so sensitive and keens at just the slightest touch.
He’s guiding Sehun through his breathing, wanting him to accommodate to the rough and dry slide of his heavy cock filling him, again and again. Sehun hisses when Chanyeol pulls back a bit, teeth clenching, making those canines all the more prominent. Chanyeol licks at them as he slides back inside and swallows up the moan that tumbles past Sehun’s lips once he’s pressed fully back inside of him again.
Sehun swirls his hips slightly, just to have as much stimulation as he can get from this slow pace that his alpha is setting. The growl that Chanyeol places right along Sehun’s pulse point is his way of saying that he will be the one handling everything.
Sehun whines and Chanyeol is all too indulged by it.
“That’s a tough question,” he remembers answering when the ever-present alpha question is presented yet again, this time in study hall. He’s staring at his algebra textbook like it’s written in morse code while Sehun’s is long forgotten, pushed to the other side of the table to occupy a couple novels instead.
He rubs the bridge of his nose and takes a break from trying to decode equations, regarding Sehun’s quizzical look with one of his own.
“Is that an essay question now too?” he jokes and Sehun grins, nodding his head.
“Yes, I’m now your professor in hybrid studies and this essay must be on my desk, in MLA format, no later than this Friday. Understood?”
“Look at you going all PHD on me. Well, Professor, can it be an oral exam instead?” He giggles childishly and continues. “Being an alpha is a rank. Well, duh, but it’s… a pillar of our community. The people who take care of the others, get shit done.”
“Omegas care for others too. And betas, my mom’s a beta and she takes care of everything at her job and around the house,” Sehun counters. Chanyeol stares back with a blank expression.
“Hey, you’re the one who asked!” he says exasperatedly. “And anyway, I just mean in this general sense. They take care of us as a whole. Protect and serve, that kind of thing. Without everyone else, alphas would serve no purpose, ya know? And without us, everyone else would be vulnerable. So it’s… like an ecosystem. That works together. Or an equation. Or these AP classes are really starting to jumble up my brain!”
He closes his textbook with a flourish and rubs his eyes. “That’s enough studying for one day. And I’m also good on the essays there, Prof. I’ve completely flunked out.”
He was questioning a lot of things at that time: where he wanted to go to school, what he wanted to study, what exactly these feelings are that he has for his best friend. That last one he was more certain of, even then. And especially now, with their lips locked, Sehun hungrily licking into his mouth as Chanyeol sets a slow but steady rhythm thrusting into him, he is entirely certain.
The way Sehun’s slick skin feels along his lips as he trails bites down his neck and how his round ass presses against his hipbones with each thrust, making Sehun moan each time, has Chanyeol growing more excited by the second. He’s leaking precum almost as heavily as his boyfriend now, making the slide in easier, allowing him to go rougher and faster: just the way he knows Sehun likes it.
Chanyeol plants his palms into the dirt for more leverage to pick up speed and with his hands now loosened from the other’s grip, Sehun is grasping onto his back. Chanyeol growls low and deep when Sehun rakes his nails along his skin, digging into him, marking him further. He’s practically panting like a dog when it spurs Chanyeol to put more strength behind his thrusts. He’s still going at the same slow, steady speed but now he’s pushing in deeper, rougher, each thrust making Sehun’s ass jiggle and his whole body jolt from his ministrations.
Sehun’s eyes are clenched tight and the look on his face is reverent, like he wouldn’t be content anywhere else in the world, like the only place he felt where he belonged was right under Chanyeol like this. He didn’t need to voice that, though several times when he’s been in this blissed out state before he has rambled on and on about it breathlessly. Just that look, the way his body molded against Chanyeol’s, how in tune they were with each other like one could start a sentence and the other could finish it showed Chanyeol that this is where he belonged too.
“What does this mean to you?” Sehun asks him as he sits on the deck.
It’s dusk and their friends had scattered to continue their night out on the town. Sehun solemnly stated that he was feeling a bit ill but Chanyeol knows the real reason why he’s opted to stay home.
He knows exactly what he’s asking as well because Sehun keeps rubbing at his neck self-consciously, right where a hickey hasn’t quite faded along it. Everyone had pointed it out and Chanyeol’s eyes bugged out at all the questions. No one knew that they were dating, both because of their alpha status but also because of their close friendship. He could hear Junmyeon practically scolding him already, not only bringing up mating but posing that they may not be ready to be at this level with each other. His guidance was well-meaning but too often delivered without sensitivity, Chanyeol had to admit that.
He was an anxious, rattling mess himself but he knew how badly things got to Sehun, how he would shrink. Chanyeol could withstand pain, rejection, ridicule: he would put on a smile and bear through it, and even though it was fake, it still got him to the other side so he could actually mean it again.
But Sehun, he would run and hide. He would curl into himself and not let anyone inside, not let himself outside. Moods like this could go on for months depending on the situation and when it came to his closest friends thoughts, he held them so highly that their disappointment could make him drop all too far.
“It means--” but before Chanyeol could even answer, Sehun whispered in a steely tone.
“Leadership. Taking care of others. Getting shit done?” He was still staring out into the distance, at the stretch of wilderness laid out before him.
He looked like he was about to take off sprinting but Chanyeol’s words made him freeze.
“It means I have you.”
Sehun looks over to him once the weight of his words settle, his eyes glistening, his mouth slightly parted in question and in awe.
“I don’t know what being an alpha means, I don’t know why I am one, why you or anyone is. I just don’t know. But if being an alpha means I get to have you, claim you, call you mine: then that’s all I need. You’re all I need.”
Sehun is too struck by his words to speak but Chanyeol can still see the lingering questions in his eyes, that constant searching.
“And it means I also get to be yours.”
There will be more than a small hickey that the two of them will be sporting today. Chanyeol especially intends on illustrating all over Sehun’s body that he is his and only his and when those nails make another bumpy trip down the curve of his spine, he knows he’ll be thoroughly claimed as well. This gets Sehun off nearly as much as the fucking does: these reminders that he can see and feel all day, these marks like love poems bore into his skin to show that he is here and he is loved and he belongs.
This is why he likes the rough, hasty sex as well, the burn and ache it leaves him with, that he can ruminate in for days until he whines and bends over and asks for it again. He likes the spent feeling, the exertion of energy, and soaking up all of the energy that Chanyeol directs towards him as well.
He’s greedy for it but so is Chanyeol.
He’s shivering against Sehun’s fingertips and it makes Sehun think of those words, his alpha’s words, telling him that Sehun is his. And telling him that he is Sehun’s as well. Sometimes he’s surprised, especially now, when he remembers that he is an alpha. And not only that, an alpha with a claim over another.
Chanyeol is thrusting into him faster now, catching deliciously on his rim and just dancing around the sweet spot he knows so well inside of him, but it’s not enough stimulation and not where Sehun needs it right now. His cock feels heavier against his stomach, painfully ignored and when he grips onto it, it has him hissing and baring his teeth in response.
Before Chanyeol can even get out the words to ask if he’s okay and needs any help, that wild spark is ignited again between them. Sehun nearly tackles the taller man, making him lurch forward, so close to where the water touches soil that the curly locks on the back of his head have become damp.
The change of position is not so he could ride him, like he had been expecting. Instead, his cock slides out of that tight heat he was buried into and flops back against his stomach. He whines, wanting that snugness back but Sehun utterly devours the sound, rutting his thoroughly soaked cock along Chanyeol’s gracelessly, fueled heatedly by his wolf.
Sehun is not as adept in dealing with his ruts like Chanyeol is. Having not only age but also experience over the other man, Chanyeol can more easily move past them and make sense of his instincts in a more orderly fashion. Sehun, however, is a creature fueled entirely by emotion and when having this much trust in the other, he can express them without holding back.
The first time he had been inside Chanyeol, he couldn’t even speak. Chanyeol even had to remind him to breathe because all that Sehun could focus on was wet hot tight. All he could even think was mine.
Chanyeol is his, not only on the marks Sehun writes along his skin or the kisses he trails down the length of his body: he has claimed Chanyeol inside and out. And now that he has slid his cock in as deep as it can go, making Chanyeol throw his head back on a long, drawn out moan, he doesn’t think he’ll ever want to leave. He could make a home inside of him if Chanyeol so wished it.
A harsh whisper of “move” from Chanyeol’s already wrecked voice has Sehun snapping into action, spurred on by the other man’s instructions. He’s so taken by the feeling, the tightness around him, how it just feels so right inside of him that he chases that feeling, rutting into him at a pace already so fast and frenzied. It makes Chanyeol gasp, grabbing onto Sehun’s hips with a bruising grip that makes him still, gazing over Chanyeol’s lust-blown face for any signs of discomfort.
All he can manage to say is “Fuck, too good. Please. I just need to. Take a breath.”
He’s panting, his sweat glistening in the moonlight, and Sehun can’t help but lick a bead of it that has just traveled down Chanyeol’s temple. It makes the other man groan, canting his hips to set his own pace, wanting to last so he can have more of Sehun inside of him, more time to savor this. His voice is deep, rumbling his chest from where Sehun has his own pressed against him, when he requests Sehun to take him.
And oh he does, making Chanyeol yelp as he’s turned over onto his stomach, hips lifted into the air so Sehun can mount him and pound away like he’s wanted to since he’s first experienced how difficult going through a rut could be. And ever since he’s noticed how absolutely delectable Chanyeol’s hips and thighs were, wondering how they’d look with his teeth marks adorning them.
Rubbing their cocks together like this feels a bit like fooling around for the first time and Chanyeol appreciates how it gives him this fluttering feeling, like they’ve snuck off from class to do this, but all he can really focus on is that he needs more. He can feel Sehun holding back, biting his lip hard to keep the alpha inside him from roaring out of him. But that is exactly what Chanyeol needs.
He’s spreading his legs obscenely, presenting himself to his alpha in a way that makes Sehun’s breath catch in his throat. No matter how often he’ll get to see Chanyeol like this, how many times he’s had Chanyeol exactly like this before, he still can’t fully digest how immensely beautiful and alluring and sexy he is like this.
All that thunders within his usually over-crowded mind is that Chanyeol is his.
He’s spitting into his hand hastily and rubbing it along the length of his cock along with his precum, so aroused that it slicks him up quite thoroughly. Chanyeol isn’t as experienced in receiving as Sehun is but he’s quick to learn and talented at most things he picks up. He’s also incredibly giving and holds his legs up to his chest so Sehun can sink more easily into his hole.
For all that Sehun is teeming with desire, wanting nothing more than to fill Chanyeol completely, he takes his time and carefully watches his face for any sign of discomfort. His gaze is so intense it makes Chanyeol throw his head back and groan, pulling at his neck to kiss Sehun roughly and whisper impatiently: “All of it. I want it all.”
That is all Sehun needs to hear before he’s thrusting roughly into the man beneath him, pressing in so deeply and deliberately on the bundle of nerves that makes Chanyeol scream out in pure pleasure that it has him moaning just as loudly. He’s rutting into him more than anything, quickly and desperately pressing the head of his cock on Chanyeol’s sweet spot again and again to stimulate them both. He pants and writhes from the ministrations, his leaking cock twitching on his stomach. That definitely catches Sehun’s attention and makes him even more bold.
Flipping them over to his preferred position, he has Chanyeol on his knees very quickly. Sehun rarely shows his strength, being a man of mostly composure and gentleness, but it serves a purpose here. And makes Chanyeol even more turned on than he possibly thought he could be. Sehun is draped fully over his back, a hand pressing on Chanyeol’s chest to make them even closer before gliding down to wrap around his swollen cock.
Sehun bites on his neck roughly, spilling whimpers into his skin as his seeking hips try to find Chanyeol’s hole once again so he can get back to the warmth and tightness of it, the only place he can even think about being at this moment. He’s so swept by his haste and need for it that he drags his length along the cleft of Chanyeol’s ass several times before finally slipping into his slick opening in one deliberate thrust.
They both groan at that, Chanyeol’s voice getting deeper and more wrecked now that his alpha has mounted him and is pounding into him roughly. There’s something so unique about the way Sehun gets intimate with him that takes Chanyeol’s breath away and he knows it’s not only because his best friend is the only one he has even thought of having sex with. It obviously differs from the way Chanyeol pleasures him but that is what makes it wonderful, the contrast.
There’s just something so feral yet demure, so inexperienced but genuine about the way Sehun fucks him and the only way he’s ever been able to put his finger on it is that even with his cock buried deep inside of him, Sehun is still aching to be good. He’s growling into his ear and biting on the lobe harshly, pistoning in and out of Chanyeol hurriedly, and pressing his body further into the dirt the closer he gets to his orgasm but it’s all for Chanyeol, to show him just how good he can be as a boyfriend, as a lover, as his alpha. His groans and grunts of instruction still taper off into whines and whimpers and silent pleas for praise and encouragement.
“So fucking good,” Chanyeol breathes out huskily. His voice always seems to lower when he’s being fucked like this, giving it a gravelly texture that makes Sehun twitch inside of him before snapping his hips even faster.
He knows he’s close because he can’t help babbling when he’s this turned on, when he can feel it all building in his gut, in his groin, all ready to release deep inside of the one he’s claimed, and in the process claiming him all over again. Just the thought makes Sehun’s heart pound nearly out of his chest, has him spilling words and biting frantically all along Chanyeol’s shoulders.
“So tight for me, fuck. I want you so badly, I need you so badly, gotta come inside, please say I can, please I need to come inside of you. Fuck, I have so much come for you,” his words run together until all he can do is whine the word “please” over and over again.
He’s grinding his cock inside of Chanyeol moreso than thrusting now, staving off his orgasm until he hears those words from Chanyeol, those orders from his alpha to release it all inside of him. In the spirit of their teasing, Chanyeol decides to wait, baiting Sehun to edge just a little closer with each cant of his hips but to not tumble into the instinct he so desperately wants to overtake him. It isn’t until Chanyeol has come all over the muddy ground and Sehun’s hand, still rubbing over his sensitive cock, that he reaches an arm back to grab at Sehun’s hair, bringing him closer to whisper “Now. Come inside me now, please alpha, I want your come inside of me.”
Sehun practically howls as he buries himself as far as he can get inside of Chanyeol and fills him with warmth, not letting a drop of his come seep out of his hole as his still very hard cock remains inside of him. The groans he makes as he comes down from his high are definitely not human and Chanyeol shivers at the feeling of his voice so close to his ear, lips feather light against his skin.
Everything is usually quiet for Chanyeol after he comes: he feels loose and relaxed, at the peak of contentment with both him and his wolf sated. He’s finally gotten past the hardest point of his rut and now he can just enjoy this closeness, this wave of pleasure feeling like a warm bath he can just sink into and bask in for what feels like forever.
He can’t explain it, but sometimes, when he comes as hard as he just did, it feels like he has this newfound sense of clarity: able to feel the world, take it as it is, and feel like everything is right within it. Only for this one fleeting moment, of course, but he is okay with that, accepts it, lets himself just get swept away by it before he can catch his breath and settle down comfortably yet again.
“What made you decide to stay?” Sehun’s voice is but a whisper piercing into the dark, rousing Chanyeol from his light slumber. It’s the first night since he’s gotten back from university, informing everyone that he would not be going back for a second year. His welcoming soon became an interrogation and everyone was trying to get an answer for the exact question Sehun just posed.
It’s the first time he has voiced it, however, and that makes Chanyeol sit up in bed, regarding Sehun with wide eyes. The younger man is still laying still, trying to look directly at the ceiling as to not make his tears any more obvious than they should already be. It’s been nearly a year since he has slept in this bed and the familiarity of it is what is making him cry more than anything.
It is the most welcome he has felt in a while and just the fact that this feels so right has him hurting so badly. He can’t even form a complete thought as to why without his heart breaking but it doesn’t make the fear any less palpable or present: it’s because he doesn’t know if the closest thing that’s felt like home could be taken away just as swiftly as it had before.
And part of him wonders if he even deserves a place to call home when he’s putting that exact title onto a person instead.
“Forget about it,” he chokes out, turning over in bed so he can let the sobs building inside of him flow more freely, shielded by the dark like this. His body is racking with each whimper that he bites back, willing himself to stay strong, stay silent, just like everyone expects of a grown up, a man, an alpha.
He was never built for this and he knows it, admitting it to himself now rather than tucking it away like all of the other disappointments he feels like he’s become. It feels like it’s all tumbling out of him at once and he can’t bear it, can feel his whole world shattering just like the day Chanyeol left.
Only he’s right here, in bed with him, so close that he can see him and feel him and smell him but he can’t let himself have him, wouldn’t dare to just reach out and take, even though every instinct and hunger and need is telling him to make Chanyeol his, just as he’s already given himself to Chanyeol before he could even dream up of what being an alpha really means.
He feels arms around him and he stills, not knowing whether to turn away from them or settle into their embrace just like he always yearns to. He finds his heart to be weak and too quickly rests against Chanyeol’s chest that presses into his back. Biting his lip as harshly as he can without breaking skin just to stifle his sobs, he can’t help but whimper once a hand gently, lovingly, caresses down his tear-stained cheek, dances over his neck and collarbone, and makes its way back up again in a soothing pattern. His breathing matches the rhythm and catches in his throat once he can feel Chanyeol’s mouth press against his ear, just breathing lightly, showing Sehun exactly what to do, soothingly lulling him back to the calm that Chanyeol’s presence often gives him.
“The reason,” he whispers with certainty along Sehun’s ear, delighting in the shivers he is met with. “That I decided to even leave. The reason that my dumb ass thought was a good idea to leave everything I’ve known to go to a college that wasn’t even my first choice, to take a course I absolutely hated, and sit through lectures that made me bored out of my mind.”
“I,” Sehun starts, so confused by what his friend is going on about, but a hand along his neck, just firmly placed along his throat, has him exhaling sharply and listening even more intently.
“The reason that I dropped everything there, left those shitty 4x4 dorm rooms and overpriced lunches and textbooks written by privileged assholes and came back here, to where my family has grown up for generations, have raised me right alongside people who understand me, where my name is carved or scrawled out on damn near everywhere I could get my hands on. The reason I am even laying in this bed right now is because of you.”
Sehun gasps, his pulse thundering so loud against his eardrum that it mixes with Chanyeol’s voice and steady breath, sounding like a song he could never listen to enough.
“The reason I am staying, the reason I will always stay, is you. It’s always been you.”
They’ve said “I love you” to each other about a million times before, for the most part unironically, but it’s all that Sehun can think to say at this moment. He can’t seem to form a word though, all he can do is breathe heavily and gasp each time he can feel Chanyeol’s breath along his skin.
He wants to shift, his wolf is howling inside of him like he’s caged and he aches to release him, to feel the most content and capable in his body that he can be because at this moment he feels like he could fall at any moment.
But his wolf also knows, at the core of his being, that he won’t ever fall when he has Chanyeol there to catch him.
“The reason I will always stay is because I am your alpha.”
Sehun feels every doubt he’s ever had leaving on each exhale. He opens his eyes and stares into the darkness of the familiar room with newfound clarity, with contentment. This just feels so right.
This feels like home.
“And because you are my alpha as well.”