Everything About Living Free [6/8]
Title: Everything about living free
Pairing: kris/lay
Rating: PG-13
Length: 43,278 words
Summary: Yixing has an eight-step list to change his life and the first thing is to get a tattoo. What’s not on the list, however, is the hot tattoo artist that comes along. (it's so much more than that, really)
{item n. 5}
6. Name a star or a galaxy
Jinri has frosting all over her mouth. Yixing snickers, remaining silent as his coworkers duel over the last one of his apple cinnamon cupcakes. Song Qian judges from her work space, watching over their heads for a possible supervisor strolling nearby. Yixing has Yifan’s cupcakes secure by his desk, knowing better than to hand a box with every single one of his baking goods to the hands of his famished coworkers.
“Damn, you’re good.” Jinri cries, sucking frosting off her fingers. “Do you bake birthday cakes? My son is turning one soon and I want a good cake.”
“I have never thought about it,” Yixing swirls his chair. “I mean, I can bake a cake, but have never done it for someone else.”
“Think about it,” Jinri says. “Gimme a price and I’ll pay. Good lord,” she hums one last time and walks back to her post.
Song Qian pushes her chair toward Yixing. Of course she would’ve been listening.
“That’s interesting.” she says. “Someone wants to pay you for your services.”
He rolls his eyes. “It’s just a cake, Song Qian.”
She lifts her hands, bright pink stiletto nails looking like real menacing claws on her fingers. They shouldn’t sharpen Song Qian’s nails. “I’m just saying that maybe that cupcake thing we talked about the other day isn’t such a stupid idea.”
He texts Yifan on his way to the tattoo place, but never gets an answer, which is odd considering his shift only starts at two. Maybe he forgot his phone at home, Yixing thinks. He enters the studio with an odd sense of familiarity, like he knows this place better now. The cashier who wears too much lipstick arches her eyebrows when catches sight of Yixing, lips stretching into a smile and head ducking instinctively. He smiles back and walks toward her. “Hi, is Yifan in?” he asks.
“Yep, I’ll buzz.” she says, vibrant red nails pressing the intercom button. She’s about to speak when the door to the small cabin flies open. Surprisingly, it’s not Yifan or Zitao who comes out -- it’s a woman. Long brown hair (interesting blue ends), loose basketball jersey, tight red pants and chuck taylors. Yixing’s first instinct is to assume she’s a customer, although she certainly lacks the horrified expression and the furrowed brows from several minutes of pain. She tosses her soft hair back and gazes at Yixing.
“Hi,” she says before calling back. “Fan, I think you’ve got a customer.”
Following her comes Yifan, basketball jersey from a totally different team as hers on, ponytailed hair. Yixing clutches his cupcake box tighter, a sort of defense mechanism, because his guts tell him something is off.
“Oh,” Yifan says, eyes wide and eyebrows arched in surprise. He blinks at Yixing for a few minutes before clearing his throat and adding. “Yixing, hi.”
“Hi,” he says, lifting the box. “I brought the cupcakes.”
The woman gasps, making grabby hands at Yixing’s box. He doesn’t have a clue who that is, but his cupcakes certainly were not baked for those hands. He tries not to look rude by hiding the box behind his back.
Yifan laughs. “Sorry. Yixing, this is Wendy.” he crosses his arms on his chest. The woman -- Wendy --, waves enthusiastically. “She’s an old friend.”
“Oh, come on,” Wendy rolls her eyes and runs a clawed hand through her soft hair; it cascades gloriously over the side of her face. Yixing swallows. “I’m his ex-girlfriend.”
There. That is it. He knew something was off. Yixing’s stomach clenches, and his heart tightens. He feels like thousands of tattoo needles are piercing through his skin. Yifan had mentioned Wendy before, when they were sitting by the poolside garden at Jongdae’s wedding reception. Yixing just never thought he would have to actually meet her.
Humming, he tries to make it seem like none of this bothers him. Like Yifan doesn’t look like he’s completely forgotten they had something scheduled in favor of hanging out with his ex-girlfriend. He also ignores the fact that they’re both wearing basketball jerseys, like it’s some kind of stupid high school drama.
“My…” Yifan scratches his arm looking timid. “Ex-girlfriend, yeah.”
Wendy chuckles, latching her arm around Yifan’s bicep. “But sometimes it’s like nothing has changed.” Yifan laughs along, and Yixing couldn’t feel worse.
He smiles politely, placing the box on the counter. He gets the leather snapback from his bag and leaves it on top of the box. “Nice to meet you, Wendy.” And then he turns to them, “I see you guys… Around.” Smiling to the cashier, Yixing spins on his heels and leaves the store. He feels so stupid, so, so stupid.
“Yixing, wait a second!” Yifan’s voice calls, and by the sound of it, he’s running to catch up. Yixing could just pretend he’s not listening, but Yifan is faster and grabs his elbow to stop him before he could make a run for safety. “Wait, why are you leaving?”
“I just figured…” he stutters, eyes on the ground because nothing would be more mortifying than facing Yifan right now. How stupid. Why is he feeling like this? “Well, I brought the cupcakes and…” he shrugs. “That’s it.”
“Listen,” Yifan says. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know Wendy would show up today. Can we hang out some other day?”
It stings. But Yixing nods anyway, “Sure. Absolutely.”
Yifan smiles. A dumb, stupid smile that tugs at Yixing’s chest and surprisingly doesn’t have the same effect. He wants to punch Yifan’s face. “I’ll call you today, ok? No, no, I’ll text you. Then later, when I get home, I’ll call you!”
“Sure,” Yixing presses his lips together and ducks his head. “Bye, Yifan.” turning around to leave with a strange feeling that someone’s watching him walk.
Yifan texts him the whole day. Meaningless emoticons or pictures of Yixing’s half-eaten cupcakes and detailed descriptions of how they taste. Yixing doesn’t answer to any, though. He simply stares at his phone, reading the texts over and over in between calls. Yifan also calls him at night. Three times before realizing Yixing just wouldn’t answer and giving up.
There’s nothing wrong, it’s just… Yixing’s been feeling weird after the visit at the studio, and specifically meeting Wendy. The way she said nothing’s changed between them... He remembers Yifan saying she was really cool when they broke up -- maybe that’s due to the fact that nothing’s changed.
✦
“I’m sure you’re overanalyzing.” Jongdae says. He taps on the screen of his iPad, probably looking over the countless, minimal details for the party Soojung is organizing. Yixing finds it interesting that Jongdae is the one in charge of mostly everything as Soojung just sits at home looking pretty.
“How am I overanalyzing? They said clearly ‘nothing changed’. As long as I’m sane, that only means one thing.” He picks up one of Peter Parker’s toys from the kitchen floor and brings it over to his little bed (that’s mostly unused because the cat seems very fond of Yixing’s hair as a sleeping surface) nearing his own bed. Baekhyun is sitting at the chair by his desk, cradling a pack of gummy bears like his life depends on it. Song Qian, on the other hand, glares at him with the intensity of a thousand white-hot suns, according to herself.
“The dude has an ex-girlfriend. Big deal. Everyone has exes.” Baekhyun says, mouth full with gummy bears.
Song Qian snickers, “Except for Baekhyun.” she laughs maliciously when he turns his head, shooting her a deadly glare. Yixing feels like he’s missing something, but ignores it.
“It’s not about the ex-girlfriend--” when Yixing starts, Jongdae cuts in.
“Yeah, nothing changed, blah blah blah,” he rolls his eyes. Yixing would what the fuck at that, but figures it’s just Soojung’s influence finally kicking in after so many years. “His friends already told you he’s into you. He kissed you. What are you waiting for? A handwritten proclamation signed by him with his fingerprints on it?”
"Tell him to come to the party." Baekhyun suggests.
He's not exactly thrilled to see Yifan. "That's not a good idea."
"Why not?" Song Qian asks. "Don't tell me you sincerely think they're hooking up."
He sighs, "They were wearing matching shirts."
"His friends wouldn't just tell you he likes you if they weren't sure."
“He wouldn’t kiss you if he wasn’t sure.”
After his friends leave, Yixing takes some time to read the texts he received from Yifan earlier. There were five of them.
One at 7am - Hey, good morning.
One at 9:17am - My mom called from the Maldives today
12:05am - Do you like this? and a picture of a drawing, a pretty watercolor tree.
3:35pm - Yixing? Are you there?
6:57pm - Can you reply so I know that you're OK?
Something tugs at Yixing's chest. Yifan sounded worried on the last text, and maybe this whole cold shoulder thing is affecting him. There's nothing Yixing wants more than to reply, but every time his finger hovers the keyboard, the image of beautiful, smiley Wendy pops in his mind.
What he's not expecting, however, is for Yifan to be waiting at his work building lounge by the end of his shift on Friday, comfortably (albeit jumpy) sitting at one of the armchairs. Yixing falters as soon as he catches sight of the tattoo artist wearing a short sleeved shirt, inked arms on display and hair in a half-ponytail. It’s like he's purposefully dressed to kill every single one of Yixing's intentions of staying away.
"Get your ass up there," Song Qian commands. "Or else," then she simply walks off.
He dawdles for a while, hoping to get caught amid the mass of workers leaving the building and escape Yifan’s eyes, however--
“Yixing!”
Yixing holds his breath, freezing where he stands as Yifan jogs up to him. When he musters the courage to look up and meet his eyes, Yixing falters. The apprehensive and anxious look on Yifan’s face is not what he expected to find. His chest tightens, and he instinctively reaches for his ear; can feel it redden.
“Hey,” Yifan says a little out of breath. He sighs, shoulders relaxing a bit and eyebrows falling into their natural angry form.
“Hi,” Yixing lowers his head stupidly, because he’s so stupid he can’t even handle Yifan’s eyes. Somehow they seem heavier than usual. He can feel those eyes on him, and it’s not remotely pleasing.
“How have you been?” Yifan hesitantly pinches the sleeve of Yixing’s coat.
“I’m ok,” Yixing breathes and looks up. Yifan’s lips tug upward for a brief second. “What’s up?”
“I hope it’s ok that I came,” he laughs nervously. “It’s just… You haven’t been answering my texts or picking up my calls. I was worried.”
“Oh,” he figures there’s no way out of this. Yixing could stomp his feet and bark about charming Wendy and her shiny, bouncy hair, and how incredibly jealous he is, since his brain seems unable to produce a believable lie, and if he could, he wouldn’t with Yifan facing him so bare and honestly. Instead, he diverts. “I’m sorry. I’ve been busy. But I was about to call you… There’s going to be a party at Jongdae and Soojung’s.”
Yifan’s eyes widen in surprise, eyebrows gently arching and lips parting. “Party? What party?”
“Soojung’s idea,” he shakes his head. “It’s on the 9th.”
The taller nods, hands in pockets and eyes never leaving Yixing’s face. Yixing, on the other hand, doesn’t know what to say, so he remains silent and waits for Yifan to say something. Or for his stomach to stop twisting agonizingly.
“Can I really come?” Yifan questions warily and bites on his lower lip.
“Of course you can. I’ll text you the address.” Yixing assures.
The other inhales. “Hey, Yixing… Are you sure there’s nothing wrong?”
Stomach twist. And a tight throat. There are two paths to follow from here. He could sulk, and keep sulking until there’s only the memory of Yifan, or he could suck it up and forget about bouncy hair and perfect nails.
Yixing sighs, stretching his lips in a close-mouthed smile and nods.
“There’s nothing wrong, Yifan,” he curls his arms around Yifan’s and tugs him along as he walks out of the building. “Now come on, I’m starving.”
✦
Cutting a cake in half requires a kind of engineering Yixing is not very familiar with. He’s accepted Jinri’s request to bake her son’s birthday cake, and she wants a two layer cake, with two round cakes of different colors - a white one, and a blue one. Yixing can bake a blue cake, it’s the cutting two cakes in half part that’s he’s concerned about. He’s got the two cakes baked already, a white one, and a blue one, and these two will compose both the bottom and top layer. Now he needs to cut both cakes in half because he wants three layers of the vanilla buttercream that he’s already got ready in the fridge. Glancing quickly at the clock, Yixing states he has two hours left to finish the cake before going to bed. While in his cake frenzy, Yixing forgot to look for an outfit for Soojung’s party (which is in exactly 24 hours and he has absolutely nothing good to wear. Something he has in the closet will have to do).
Funny thing is how he’s concerned about his clothes. It never happened before, Yixing was always the kind of guy to throw on whatever it fits him on. Maybe knowing Yifan will be there is making him conscious about his looks.
He mounts the cake carefully and removes the excess of filling from the sides before starting with the frosting - also blue. He’s liking the results so far, there’s only the piping with white buttercream left and he’ll be done. Once he is done, he snaps a picture and sends it to the group chat with Song Qian, Baekhyun and Jongdae.
am i qualified to be a patissier?
Jongdae answers in no time. DID YOU REALLY MAKE THAT?
Baekhyun: Of course he made that, can’t you seeing his cat peeking from behind the table?
Yixing narrows his eyes at the picture and finds Peter Parker staring at the cake. He looks for his cat around the kitchen, and finds him sitting on a chair behind the table. Yixing places his cellphone on the table and puts the cake in the fridge from sheer prevention against his curious feline.
Song Qian: OMG yixing it’s beautiful! jinri will be so happy!
Jongdae: Soojung says she wants you to make a thousand cupcakes for her party.
Yixing rolls his eyes. tell her to get off her high horse.
Baekhyun: HAHA tell her that jongdae.
Song Qian: are you excited for the party? is mr. handsome coming?
Yixing had decided that he would not suffer from anticipation of what could happen during this party. There was a kiss, even if it was the gentlest and most innocent kiss Yixing’s ever shared, it was a kiss nonetheless. Yifan could have kissed him again if he wanted to, but he didn’t. Maybe it means something. Maybe it means he’s not up for the same things Yixing is, and Yixing won’t wait around to be ditched. He’ll go to Soojung’s party and have a great time without over thinking about Yifan.
Jinri loves the cake and thanks Yixing a million times before handing him the money he had asked for the cake. He couldn’t really charge her for an experimental thing that could have gone completely wrong. It didn’t, though, and Jinri is so happy with it she calls her entire family to talk about it. Yixing is pleased.
His whole shift passes in a blur, and soon he’s heading home with Song Qian in tow claiming how he needs her help in getting ready, which is another of her insanities. He dresses in a pair of simple jeans, avoids Song Qian’s attempts to put him into an orange shirt (to match what’s left of his orange hair), and a dark blue button down that he doesn’t even care to tuck, into his pants (“This is outrageous!” Song Qian cries as they climb down the stairs).
It’s 9:40 when they get to Soojung and Jongdae’s apartment, and there are at least twenty faces Yixing can’t remember or doesn’t know. It’s expected, considering Soojung knows so many people and he’s severely restricted to his group of friends and coworkers. As soon as they step inside, Yixing is happy he’s chosen the button down instead of the sleazy t-shirt he had in mind all day, everyone is impeccably dressed in seemingly expensive clothes and perfect hairs. Yixing didn’t comb his hair. He pats his strands down and hopes that no one notices.
“You’re late!” Baekhyun comes from the kitchen still wearing his work attire, black tie loosened around his neck. He carries a bottle of beer. “They’re serving champagne, but there’s also beer in the fridge.” he smiles and checks Song Qian out. “You don’t look half bad.”
She snorts and tosses her hair. “Can’t say the same about you.”
Yixing is not even amazed by how easily they fall into bickering and pulling at each other’s pigtails. He sighs and walks toward a very bored looking Jongdae amongst a circle of Soojung’s boisterous friends. Jongdae’s eyes immediately lighten up when he catches sight of Yixing, excusing himself and meeting him halfway.
“Hey,” he engulfs Yixing into a tight hug. “I thought I’d have to be there the whole night. Those people are awful.”
“Your wife’s friends.” Yixing teases, elbowing his friend. Jongdae gives him a ‘really?’ look before laughing loudly and characteristically.
“So. Is your man coming?” Jongdae sips his champagne. Yixing tries to stand still, as if Jongdae referring to Yifan as his man doesn’t do a single thing to his mind and body.
“He’s not my man, and I don’t know. He might be coming, I’m not very sure. I mean, I told him about the party, texted him the address.” he shrugs. “I’m not relying on the chances of him showing up.”
His eyes are on the well dressed people scattered all around the room, but Yixing can still feel Jongdae’s inquiring eyes on him, waiting for an addition to what he just said. Probably waiting for him to say he’s waiting for Yifan to show up.
Yixing had decided to have a great time at Soojung’s party, however, one hour and twelve minutes later he’s searching for his friends to tell them that he’s about to leave. Jongdae chides very much, annoyed that Yixing is leaving so early, but Baekhyun and Song Qian doesn’t seem to mind, considering Yixing found them in the kitchen getting cozy (which kinda shocked him to death, but according to Jongdae, it was just a matter of time).
When he’s almost stepping out of the apartment, Jongdae closes his fingers around Yixing’s forearm, gazes at him with soft eyes, and asks if he’s leaving because Yifan didn’t show up. Truth is, he doesn’t know. Maybe he wasn’t into the party after all and coming home to his bed and his cat sounded like the best idea he’s had the whole day.
The subway ride from Bangbae station to Sillim station isn’t long (maybe Yixing was just that much distracted). On the way home, he thinks about taking a long, warm shower and cuddling in bed with Peter Parker until the cat eventually falls asleep on his head, as usual.
But isn’t included in his plan is most definitely not Yifan, who is sitting by his doorstep, arms wrapped around his legs and chin on knees. Not lifting his eyes to meet Yixing’s when he approaches, not definitely waiting for him.
He frowns, hoping that the loud gasp isn’t heard somehow, and Yifan rushes to his feet. He’s anxious, wiping his palms on his pants and reaching for the leather snapback he’s wearing. Yifan looks devastatingly handsome -- or it can be simply how Yixing has missed him.
“I went to the party,” he explains after realizing Yixing wouldn’t speak. “I mean, I got to the building and when I was almost going in, I realized the only reason I was there was to see you. I didn’t want to be in a room full of people, I wanted to be with you. So I took the risk and came over to your place… Hoping that you would… Come home soon.”
Yixing doesn’t know what surprises him the most. If it’s the actual fact that Yifan is in front of him, having waited for god knows how long, or knowing that he went to the party. Yixing hasn’t seen him since the day at his workplace, and looking at him right now feels like a deep, much needed breath.
He blinks, picking his keys on his pocket and spinning them on his fingers. “Do you wanna come in?”
Yifan looks unsure at first, but when Yixing unlocks the door, he follows behind.
Yixing dumps everything he is carrying on his TV set and looks for Peter Parker. The cat is in the kitchen, head buried in his food bowl. “Is there a real reason why you’re here?” he asks when the weight of Yifan’s eyes on him is too much to ignore.
“I don’t know.” Yifan sighs. “We haven’t known each other for long, and maybe I shouldn’t feel so sad if you’re not talking to me, but I do. ”
Now is a great time for Yixing to frown and roll his eyes, say he’s not not talking to Yifan and everything is a big misunderstanding. He just pushes his shoes off and sits on his bed.
“Is this about Wendy?” the other continues as he fidgets with his hands, nervous fingers twisting around each other. “You’ve been weird ever since you met Wendy. There’s nothing going on between us, Yixing. She’s only my friend and has already went back to Canada.”
When Yixing doesn’t talk again, Yifan pulls his snapback off, and it’s so clearly another nervous gesture. “Are you still not talking to me? Can you please tell me what I did so I can fix it? Or apologize, I don’t know.”
“You don’t have to apologize,” he finally says. Yifan drops down on his knees in front of him, hands just barely grazing Yixing’s feet, and his stomach twists. He blinks the feeling off and lets their gazes meet. “I’m sorry I haven’t been replying your texts.”
“Is there a real reason why you didn’t?” Yifan asks, the mirth in his eyes warming Yixing’s heart. He chuckles, lowering his head before facing the other again, but still doesn’t answer.
“I thought you would want to talk about that kiss.” It’s like Yifan is tiptoeing around the subject, teeth catching his lower lip in worry as he studies Yixing closely. “Don’t you wanna talk about that kiss?”
He thought about the kiss. A lot. But still... “Not really. I don’t.”
Yifan nods eagerly. “Okay. Okay, then can I just keep you company?”
There’s no real reason to say no. Yifan looks so much like he wants to stay, and Yixing really wants him to. So he pats the space next to him on the bed.
It’s easy to forget about the space Yixing put between them when Yifan lies next to him, eyes glued to the TV, but not really watching. Sometimes he makes comments about the reality show that’s on, and yet his thoughts are so loud that Yixing is almost a part of them.
“About Wendy…” Yixing says after a while. Yifan turns on his side, giving him full attention. “She said nothing had changed between you two.”
“What?” Yifan chokes. “Oh no… You got everything… So… Royally wrong.” he runs nervous hands in his hair. “She said that in a sense that… When we were together we were like we are now. Like friends.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
For a while, there’s only the noise from the television. A few screaming girls and audience cheering -- seems like someone won something.
The rustling of his sheets indicate that Yifan is moving closer. Yixing holds his breath when he feels the cool tip of Yifan’s nose touching his neck. His whole body reacts in several different ways; there’s his stomach somersaulting, then there’s his heart thumping so loud in his chest that he’s certain that Yifan can hear it. There’s his lips, chapped and parted. There’s also his hands, aching to reach and touch Yifan. He’s so close.
When Yifan speaks, Yixing’s heart skips a beat and his chest hurts. “Can I hold you? I promise I won’t do anything else.”
It’s somewhat weird, the way they’re pressed against each other. Yifan is taller, and his face is snugly pressed on Yixing’s neck expanse while Yixing’s toes touch slightly above Yifan’s calf. If they’re cold, no one complains.
Suddenly, he realizes Yifan is still waiting for an answer. “Would you do anything else?”
“Not if you don’t want me to,” his lips ghost over Yixing’s skin, and the warm puffs of air that touch his neck sends chills down his spine. He’s almost saying he wants him to, so desperately wants Yifan to hold him, to do something, anything, whatever he wants. Turns out he doesn’t have to; Yifan’s hand finds his torso, snakes across his stomach and settles against his hipbone. He closes his eyes and allows Yifan to drag him even closer and breathe against his neck.
There’s something off about being held by Yifan, about feeling Yifan’s breathing. It’s been a long time since Yixing’s let someone hold him like this, but in the end it hasn’t meant anything. Maybe this is why being so close to someone is so scary. Yifan could figure out anything about him like this; he can’t hide like this.
“I want you to,” he says, and he really couldn’t mean it more. Yifan’s thumb, that’s been rubbing circles on his hipbone, stills. “But I’m not sure if now is the moment.”
Yifan sighs and his fingers tighten against Yixing. It feels like reassurance.
✦
Skipping work is easier than one would think. Yixing calls in sick on Thursday as Yifan wears his boots and searches for his snapback. On Friday he doesn’t even bother calling, lets HR reach him with the usual questions, ‘why aren’t you at your work post?’, ‘do you intend coming over?’, ‘do you have medical leave?’.
Truth is he doesn’t feel like working. At all. He feels like thrusting his head out the window and breathing the slightly polluted and smelling-like-pork air. He feels like letting Peter Parker nap on the kitchen sink, he feels like shaving his head because his roots are too long and there isn’t any hair dye left. He feels like so many things and he hasn’t felt like this in a long while.
He goes out to the Bangsan Market and shops for baking supplies, things he’s been looking online and wanting for some time. Piping tips and spatulas, bowls and measure spoons. As he looks for food coloring, finds a couple of adorable sprinkles and beads that seem perfect for little eyes and details and buys them too. He buys ingredients and fruits and anything else he thinks will look and taste good on a cake.
On his way back to Sillim-dong, he texts Yifan.
Bought all these baking stuff. Want some cake?
The answer comes right away. i’m at the studio, where are you?
Far from you, Yixing types. Just passed Seongsu station heading to Gwanak.
off around 2pm today. want me to come over? another text pops in. i’ll be seriously hungry then.
He smiles, biting on his lower lip. There will be lots of buttercream for you to eat.
i’ll bring burgers.
That’s how Yixing finds himself surrounded by colorful bowls and meringue all over the counter. He has to fight Peter Parker off his extremely enticing colored cake batter several times (although he’s pretty sure the cat manages to lick a little purple batter that’s dripped onto the counter).
Yifan is on the floor, Yixing’s computer on his lap as he searches for a reliable manner to register a star.
“There are all these sites that allow you to buy a star, or name one whatever,” he frowns at the screen. Yixing wants to move over and smoothen the lines on his forehead. “But I’m not sure if you give it a name it will actually be its name.”
“Is there a website related to the international space station or NASA, I don’t know?” Yixing licks cream off his finger and removes his perfectly baked red and yellow layers for the rainbow cake he decided to fix from the oven before pushing the blue and green ones in.
“No. Actually, I just came across an article explaining that the names we buy are fictional, and no astronomer will ever call the star that name.” Yifan blinks and looks up at Yixing. “Says only the international astronomical union can assign names to celestial objects. Sorry Yixing.”
Huffing, Yixing crosses his arms. “Have I fooled myself my entire life? I’ve always wanted to name a star!”
Closing the computer shut, Yifan stands up and gives a couple of strides to place it on the bed before returning to the kitchen and leaning back against the counter. “We can go star-gazing and just point to some starts giving them names.” he shrugs. “I mean, you need to do this, right? For your list?”
He thinks about it.
There is no actual way of naming a star. For real. He can’t complete this item
“I can’t do this if there’s no way to get it done.”
“Well, if you know an astronomer there’s a way.” Yifan says mirthfully. Yixing rolls his eyes. “Yeah, there’s no way. So what are you going to do now?”
Yixing squints, forcing his mind to come up with a good idea. Turns out he doesn’t even need to think too much.
“I’ll get my own stars.”
6. Name a star or a galaxy Get a star
Yixing gets his cakes out of the oven and drags Yifan to the toy shop near his apartment building. He’s seen little phosphorescent stars and galaxies on sale as decorative items for children’s bedrooms. Yifan laughs at him, but he buys it and they glue it all around Yixing’s apartment. They also name every single one of them. There are twenty stars.
When they finish, Yifan drops on his bed and looks at him. “Star, done. What’s next?”
Yixing nods and drops next to him. “Now comes something meaningful,” and he’s never been this sure.
{item n. 7}
Pairing: kris/lay
Rating: PG-13
Length: 43,278 words
Summary: Yixing has an eight-step list to change his life and the first thing is to get a tattoo. What’s not on the list, however, is the hot tattoo artist that comes along. (it's so much more than that, really)
{item n. 5}
6. Name a star or a galaxy
Jinri has frosting all over her mouth. Yixing snickers, remaining silent as his coworkers duel over the last one of his apple cinnamon cupcakes. Song Qian judges from her work space, watching over their heads for a possible supervisor strolling nearby. Yixing has Yifan’s cupcakes secure by his desk, knowing better than to hand a box with every single one of his baking goods to the hands of his famished coworkers.
“Damn, you’re good.” Jinri cries, sucking frosting off her fingers. “Do you bake birthday cakes? My son is turning one soon and I want a good cake.”
“I have never thought about it,” Yixing swirls his chair. “I mean, I can bake a cake, but have never done it for someone else.”
“Think about it,” Jinri says. “Gimme a price and I’ll pay. Good lord,” she hums one last time and walks back to her post.
Song Qian pushes her chair toward Yixing. Of course she would’ve been listening.
“That’s interesting.” she says. “Someone wants to pay you for your services.”
He rolls his eyes. “It’s just a cake, Song Qian.”
She lifts her hands, bright pink stiletto nails looking like real menacing claws on her fingers. They shouldn’t sharpen Song Qian’s nails. “I’m just saying that maybe that cupcake thing we talked about the other day isn’t such a stupid idea.”
He texts Yifan on his way to the tattoo place, but never gets an answer, which is odd considering his shift only starts at two. Maybe he forgot his phone at home, Yixing thinks. He enters the studio with an odd sense of familiarity, like he knows this place better now. The cashier who wears too much lipstick arches her eyebrows when catches sight of Yixing, lips stretching into a smile and head ducking instinctively. He smiles back and walks toward her. “Hi, is Yifan in?” he asks.
“Yep, I’ll buzz.” she says, vibrant red nails pressing the intercom button. She’s about to speak when the door to the small cabin flies open. Surprisingly, it’s not Yifan or Zitao who comes out -- it’s a woman. Long brown hair (interesting blue ends), loose basketball jersey, tight red pants and chuck taylors. Yixing’s first instinct is to assume she’s a customer, although she certainly lacks the horrified expression and the furrowed brows from several minutes of pain. She tosses her soft hair back and gazes at Yixing.
“Hi,” she says before calling back. “Fan, I think you’ve got a customer.”
Following her comes Yifan, basketball jersey from a totally different team as hers on, ponytailed hair. Yixing clutches his cupcake box tighter, a sort of defense mechanism, because his guts tell him something is off.
“Oh,” Yifan says, eyes wide and eyebrows arched in surprise. He blinks at Yixing for a few minutes before clearing his throat and adding. “Yixing, hi.”
“Hi,” he says, lifting the box. “I brought the cupcakes.”
The woman gasps, making grabby hands at Yixing’s box. He doesn’t have a clue who that is, but his cupcakes certainly were not baked for those hands. He tries not to look rude by hiding the box behind his back.
Yifan laughs. “Sorry. Yixing, this is Wendy.” he crosses his arms on his chest. The woman -- Wendy --, waves enthusiastically. “She’s an old friend.”
“Oh, come on,” Wendy rolls her eyes and runs a clawed hand through her soft hair; it cascades gloriously over the side of her face. Yixing swallows. “I’m his ex-girlfriend.”
There. That is it. He knew something was off. Yixing’s stomach clenches, and his heart tightens. He feels like thousands of tattoo needles are piercing through his skin. Yifan had mentioned Wendy before, when they were sitting by the poolside garden at Jongdae’s wedding reception. Yixing just never thought he would have to actually meet her.
Humming, he tries to make it seem like none of this bothers him. Like Yifan doesn’t look like he’s completely forgotten they had something scheduled in favor of hanging out with his ex-girlfriend. He also ignores the fact that they’re both wearing basketball jerseys, like it’s some kind of stupid high school drama.
“My…” Yifan scratches his arm looking timid. “Ex-girlfriend, yeah.”
Wendy chuckles, latching her arm around Yifan’s bicep. “But sometimes it’s like nothing has changed.” Yifan laughs along, and Yixing couldn’t feel worse.
He smiles politely, placing the box on the counter. He gets the leather snapback from his bag and leaves it on top of the box. “Nice to meet you, Wendy.” And then he turns to them, “I see you guys… Around.” Smiling to the cashier, Yixing spins on his heels and leaves the store. He feels so stupid, so, so stupid.
“Yixing, wait a second!” Yifan’s voice calls, and by the sound of it, he’s running to catch up. Yixing could just pretend he’s not listening, but Yifan is faster and grabs his elbow to stop him before he could make a run for safety. “Wait, why are you leaving?”
“I just figured…” he stutters, eyes on the ground because nothing would be more mortifying than facing Yifan right now. How stupid. Why is he feeling like this? “Well, I brought the cupcakes and…” he shrugs. “That’s it.”
“Listen,” Yifan says. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know Wendy would show up today. Can we hang out some other day?”
It stings. But Yixing nods anyway, “Sure. Absolutely.”
Yifan smiles. A dumb, stupid smile that tugs at Yixing’s chest and surprisingly doesn’t have the same effect. He wants to punch Yifan’s face. “I’ll call you today, ok? No, no, I’ll text you. Then later, when I get home, I’ll call you!”
“Sure,” Yixing presses his lips together and ducks his head. “Bye, Yifan.” turning around to leave with a strange feeling that someone’s watching him walk.
Yifan texts him the whole day. Meaningless emoticons or pictures of Yixing’s half-eaten cupcakes and detailed descriptions of how they taste. Yixing doesn’t answer to any, though. He simply stares at his phone, reading the texts over and over in between calls. Yifan also calls him at night. Three times before realizing Yixing just wouldn’t answer and giving up.
There’s nothing wrong, it’s just… Yixing’s been feeling weird after the visit at the studio, and specifically meeting Wendy. The way she said nothing’s changed between them... He remembers Yifan saying she was really cool when they broke up -- maybe that’s due to the fact that nothing’s changed.
✦
“I’m sure you’re overanalyzing.” Jongdae says. He taps on the screen of his iPad, probably looking over the countless, minimal details for the party Soojung is organizing. Yixing finds it interesting that Jongdae is the one in charge of mostly everything as Soojung just sits at home looking pretty.
“How am I overanalyzing? They said clearly ‘nothing changed’. As long as I’m sane, that only means one thing.” He picks up one of Peter Parker’s toys from the kitchen floor and brings it over to his little bed (that’s mostly unused because the cat seems very fond of Yixing’s hair as a sleeping surface) nearing his own bed. Baekhyun is sitting at the chair by his desk, cradling a pack of gummy bears like his life depends on it. Song Qian, on the other hand, glares at him with the intensity of a thousand white-hot suns, according to herself.
“The dude has an ex-girlfriend. Big deal. Everyone has exes.” Baekhyun says, mouth full with gummy bears.
Song Qian snickers, “Except for Baekhyun.” she laughs maliciously when he turns his head, shooting her a deadly glare. Yixing feels like he’s missing something, but ignores it.
“It’s not about the ex-girlfriend--” when Yixing starts, Jongdae cuts in.
“Yeah, nothing changed, blah blah blah,” he rolls his eyes. Yixing would what the fuck at that, but figures it’s just Soojung’s influence finally kicking in after so many years. “His friends already told you he’s into you. He kissed you. What are you waiting for? A handwritten proclamation signed by him with his fingerprints on it?”
"Tell him to come to the party." Baekhyun suggests.
He's not exactly thrilled to see Yifan. "That's not a good idea."
"Why not?" Song Qian asks. "Don't tell me you sincerely think they're hooking up."
He sighs, "They were wearing matching shirts."
"His friends wouldn't just tell you he likes you if they weren't sure."
“He wouldn’t kiss you if he wasn’t sure.”
After his friends leave, Yixing takes some time to read the texts he received from Yifan earlier. There were five of them.
One at 7am - Hey, good morning.
One at 9:17am - My mom called from the Maldives today
12:05am - Do you like this? and a picture of a drawing, a pretty watercolor tree.
3:35pm - Yixing? Are you there?
6:57pm - Can you reply so I know that you're OK?
Something tugs at Yixing's chest. Yifan sounded worried on the last text, and maybe this whole cold shoulder thing is affecting him. There's nothing Yixing wants more than to reply, but every time his finger hovers the keyboard, the image of beautiful, smiley Wendy pops in his mind.
What he's not expecting, however, is for Yifan to be waiting at his work building lounge by the end of his shift on Friday, comfortably (albeit jumpy) sitting at one of the armchairs. Yixing falters as soon as he catches sight of the tattoo artist wearing a short sleeved shirt, inked arms on display and hair in a half-ponytail. It’s like he's purposefully dressed to kill every single one of Yixing's intentions of staying away.
"Get your ass up there," Song Qian commands. "Or else," then she simply walks off.
He dawdles for a while, hoping to get caught amid the mass of workers leaving the building and escape Yifan’s eyes, however--
“Yixing!”
Yixing holds his breath, freezing where he stands as Yifan jogs up to him. When he musters the courage to look up and meet his eyes, Yixing falters. The apprehensive and anxious look on Yifan’s face is not what he expected to find. His chest tightens, and he instinctively reaches for his ear; can feel it redden.
“Hey,” Yifan says a little out of breath. He sighs, shoulders relaxing a bit and eyebrows falling into their natural angry form.
“Hi,” Yixing lowers his head stupidly, because he’s so stupid he can’t even handle Yifan’s eyes. Somehow they seem heavier than usual. He can feel those eyes on him, and it’s not remotely pleasing.
“How have you been?” Yifan hesitantly pinches the sleeve of Yixing’s coat.
“I’m ok,” Yixing breathes and looks up. Yifan’s lips tug upward for a brief second. “What’s up?”
“I hope it’s ok that I came,” he laughs nervously. “It’s just… You haven’t been answering my texts or picking up my calls. I was worried.”
“Oh,” he figures there’s no way out of this. Yixing could stomp his feet and bark about charming Wendy and her shiny, bouncy hair, and how incredibly jealous he is, since his brain seems unable to produce a believable lie, and if he could, he wouldn’t with Yifan facing him so bare and honestly. Instead, he diverts. “I’m sorry. I’ve been busy. But I was about to call you… There’s going to be a party at Jongdae and Soojung’s.”
Yifan’s eyes widen in surprise, eyebrows gently arching and lips parting. “Party? What party?”
“Soojung’s idea,” he shakes his head. “It’s on the 9th.”
The taller nods, hands in pockets and eyes never leaving Yixing’s face. Yixing, on the other hand, doesn’t know what to say, so he remains silent and waits for Yifan to say something. Or for his stomach to stop twisting agonizingly.
“Can I really come?” Yifan questions warily and bites on his lower lip.
“Of course you can. I’ll text you the address.” Yixing assures.
The other inhales. “Hey, Yixing… Are you sure there’s nothing wrong?”
Stomach twist. And a tight throat. There are two paths to follow from here. He could sulk, and keep sulking until there’s only the memory of Yifan, or he could suck it up and forget about bouncy hair and perfect nails.
Yixing sighs, stretching his lips in a close-mouthed smile and nods.
“There’s nothing wrong, Yifan,” he curls his arms around Yifan’s and tugs him along as he walks out of the building. “Now come on, I’m starving.”
✦
Cutting a cake in half requires a kind of engineering Yixing is not very familiar with. He’s accepted Jinri’s request to bake her son’s birthday cake, and she wants a two layer cake, with two round cakes of different colors - a white one, and a blue one. Yixing can bake a blue cake, it’s the cutting two cakes in half part that’s he’s concerned about. He’s got the two cakes baked already, a white one, and a blue one, and these two will compose both the bottom and top layer. Now he needs to cut both cakes in half because he wants three layers of the vanilla buttercream that he’s already got ready in the fridge. Glancing quickly at the clock, Yixing states he has two hours left to finish the cake before going to bed. While in his cake frenzy, Yixing forgot to look for an outfit for Soojung’s party (which is in exactly 24 hours and he has absolutely nothing good to wear. Something he has in the closet will have to do).
Funny thing is how he’s concerned about his clothes. It never happened before, Yixing was always the kind of guy to throw on whatever it fits him on. Maybe knowing Yifan will be there is making him conscious about his looks.
He mounts the cake carefully and removes the excess of filling from the sides before starting with the frosting - also blue. He’s liking the results so far, there’s only the piping with white buttercream left and he’ll be done. Once he is done, he snaps a picture and sends it to the group chat with Song Qian, Baekhyun and Jongdae.
am i qualified to be a patissier?
Jongdae answers in no time. DID YOU REALLY MAKE THAT?
Baekhyun: Of course he made that, can’t you seeing his cat peeking from behind the table?
Yixing narrows his eyes at the picture and finds Peter Parker staring at the cake. He looks for his cat around the kitchen, and finds him sitting on a chair behind the table. Yixing places his cellphone on the table and puts the cake in the fridge from sheer prevention against his curious feline.
Song Qian: OMG yixing it’s beautiful! jinri will be so happy!
Jongdae: Soojung says she wants you to make a thousand cupcakes for her party.
Yixing rolls his eyes. tell her to get off her high horse.
Baekhyun: HAHA tell her that jongdae.
Song Qian: are you excited for the party? is mr. handsome coming?
Yixing had decided that he would not suffer from anticipation of what could happen during this party. There was a kiss, even if it was the gentlest and most innocent kiss Yixing’s ever shared, it was a kiss nonetheless. Yifan could have kissed him again if he wanted to, but he didn’t. Maybe it means something. Maybe it means he’s not up for the same things Yixing is, and Yixing won’t wait around to be ditched. He’ll go to Soojung’s party and have a great time without over thinking about Yifan.
Jinri loves the cake and thanks Yixing a million times before handing him the money he had asked for the cake. He couldn’t really charge her for an experimental thing that could have gone completely wrong. It didn’t, though, and Jinri is so happy with it she calls her entire family to talk about it. Yixing is pleased.
His whole shift passes in a blur, and soon he’s heading home with Song Qian in tow claiming how he needs her help in getting ready, which is another of her insanities. He dresses in a pair of simple jeans, avoids Song Qian’s attempts to put him into an orange shirt (to match what’s left of his orange hair), and a dark blue button down that he doesn’t even care to tuck, into his pants (“This is outrageous!” Song Qian cries as they climb down the stairs).
It’s 9:40 when they get to Soojung and Jongdae’s apartment, and there are at least twenty faces Yixing can’t remember or doesn’t know. It’s expected, considering Soojung knows so many people and he’s severely restricted to his group of friends and coworkers. As soon as they step inside, Yixing is happy he’s chosen the button down instead of the sleazy t-shirt he had in mind all day, everyone is impeccably dressed in seemingly expensive clothes and perfect hairs. Yixing didn’t comb his hair. He pats his strands down and hopes that no one notices.
“You’re late!” Baekhyun comes from the kitchen still wearing his work attire, black tie loosened around his neck. He carries a bottle of beer. “They’re serving champagne, but there’s also beer in the fridge.” he smiles and checks Song Qian out. “You don’t look half bad.”
She snorts and tosses her hair. “Can’t say the same about you.”
Yixing is not even amazed by how easily they fall into bickering and pulling at each other’s pigtails. He sighs and walks toward a very bored looking Jongdae amongst a circle of Soojung’s boisterous friends. Jongdae’s eyes immediately lighten up when he catches sight of Yixing, excusing himself and meeting him halfway.
“Hey,” he engulfs Yixing into a tight hug. “I thought I’d have to be there the whole night. Those people are awful.”
“Your wife’s friends.” Yixing teases, elbowing his friend. Jongdae gives him a ‘really?’ look before laughing loudly and characteristically.
“So. Is your man coming?” Jongdae sips his champagne. Yixing tries to stand still, as if Jongdae referring to Yifan as his man doesn’t do a single thing to his mind and body.
“He’s not my man, and I don’t know. He might be coming, I’m not very sure. I mean, I told him about the party, texted him the address.” he shrugs. “I’m not relying on the chances of him showing up.”
His eyes are on the well dressed people scattered all around the room, but Yixing can still feel Jongdae’s inquiring eyes on him, waiting for an addition to what he just said. Probably waiting for him to say he’s waiting for Yifan to show up.
Yixing had decided to have a great time at Soojung’s party, however, one hour and twelve minutes later he’s searching for his friends to tell them that he’s about to leave. Jongdae chides very much, annoyed that Yixing is leaving so early, but Baekhyun and Song Qian doesn’t seem to mind, considering Yixing found them in the kitchen getting cozy (which kinda shocked him to death, but according to Jongdae, it was just a matter of time).
When he’s almost stepping out of the apartment, Jongdae closes his fingers around Yixing’s forearm, gazes at him with soft eyes, and asks if he’s leaving because Yifan didn’t show up. Truth is, he doesn’t know. Maybe he wasn’t into the party after all and coming home to his bed and his cat sounded like the best idea he’s had the whole day.
The subway ride from Bangbae station to Sillim station isn’t long (maybe Yixing was just that much distracted). On the way home, he thinks about taking a long, warm shower and cuddling in bed with Peter Parker until the cat eventually falls asleep on his head, as usual.
But isn’t included in his plan is most definitely not Yifan, who is sitting by his doorstep, arms wrapped around his legs and chin on knees. Not lifting his eyes to meet Yixing’s when he approaches, not definitely waiting for him.
He frowns, hoping that the loud gasp isn’t heard somehow, and Yifan rushes to his feet. He’s anxious, wiping his palms on his pants and reaching for the leather snapback he’s wearing. Yifan looks devastatingly handsome -- or it can be simply how Yixing has missed him.
“I went to the party,” he explains after realizing Yixing wouldn’t speak. “I mean, I got to the building and when I was almost going in, I realized the only reason I was there was to see you. I didn’t want to be in a room full of people, I wanted to be with you. So I took the risk and came over to your place… Hoping that you would… Come home soon.”
Yixing doesn’t know what surprises him the most. If it’s the actual fact that Yifan is in front of him, having waited for god knows how long, or knowing that he went to the party. Yixing hasn’t seen him since the day at his workplace, and looking at him right now feels like a deep, much needed breath.
He blinks, picking his keys on his pocket and spinning them on his fingers. “Do you wanna come in?”
Yifan looks unsure at first, but when Yixing unlocks the door, he follows behind.
Yixing dumps everything he is carrying on his TV set and looks for Peter Parker. The cat is in the kitchen, head buried in his food bowl. “Is there a real reason why you’re here?” he asks when the weight of Yifan’s eyes on him is too much to ignore.
“I don’t know.” Yifan sighs. “We haven’t known each other for long, and maybe I shouldn’t feel so sad if you’re not talking to me, but I do. ”
Now is a great time for Yixing to frown and roll his eyes, say he’s not not talking to Yifan and everything is a big misunderstanding. He just pushes his shoes off and sits on his bed.
“Is this about Wendy?” the other continues as he fidgets with his hands, nervous fingers twisting around each other. “You’ve been weird ever since you met Wendy. There’s nothing going on between us, Yixing. She’s only my friend and has already went back to Canada.”
When Yixing doesn’t talk again, Yifan pulls his snapback off, and it’s so clearly another nervous gesture. “Are you still not talking to me? Can you please tell me what I did so I can fix it? Or apologize, I don’t know.”
“You don’t have to apologize,” he finally says. Yifan drops down on his knees in front of him, hands just barely grazing Yixing’s feet, and his stomach twists. He blinks the feeling off and lets their gazes meet. “I’m sorry I haven’t been replying your texts.”
“Is there a real reason why you didn’t?” Yifan asks, the mirth in his eyes warming Yixing’s heart. He chuckles, lowering his head before facing the other again, but still doesn’t answer.
“I thought you would want to talk about that kiss.” It’s like Yifan is tiptoeing around the subject, teeth catching his lower lip in worry as he studies Yixing closely. “Don’t you wanna talk about that kiss?”
He thought about the kiss. A lot. But still... “Not really. I don’t.”
Yifan nods eagerly. “Okay. Okay, then can I just keep you company?”
There’s no real reason to say no. Yifan looks so much like he wants to stay, and Yixing really wants him to. So he pats the space next to him on the bed.
It’s easy to forget about the space Yixing put between them when Yifan lies next to him, eyes glued to the TV, but not really watching. Sometimes he makes comments about the reality show that’s on, and yet his thoughts are so loud that Yixing is almost a part of them.
“About Wendy…” Yixing says after a while. Yifan turns on his side, giving him full attention. “She said nothing had changed between you two.”
“What?” Yifan chokes. “Oh no… You got everything… So… Royally wrong.” he runs nervous hands in his hair. “She said that in a sense that… When we were together we were like we are now. Like friends.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
For a while, there’s only the noise from the television. A few screaming girls and audience cheering -- seems like someone won something.
The rustling of his sheets indicate that Yifan is moving closer. Yixing holds his breath when he feels the cool tip of Yifan’s nose touching his neck. His whole body reacts in several different ways; there’s his stomach somersaulting, then there’s his heart thumping so loud in his chest that he’s certain that Yifan can hear it. There’s his lips, chapped and parted. There’s also his hands, aching to reach and touch Yifan. He’s so close.
When Yifan speaks, Yixing’s heart skips a beat and his chest hurts. “Can I hold you? I promise I won’t do anything else.”
It’s somewhat weird, the way they’re pressed against each other. Yifan is taller, and his face is snugly pressed on Yixing’s neck expanse while Yixing’s toes touch slightly above Yifan’s calf. If they’re cold, no one complains.
Suddenly, he realizes Yifan is still waiting for an answer. “Would you do anything else?”
“Not if you don’t want me to,” his lips ghost over Yixing’s skin, and the warm puffs of air that touch his neck sends chills down his spine. He’s almost saying he wants him to, so desperately wants Yifan to hold him, to do something, anything, whatever he wants. Turns out he doesn’t have to; Yifan’s hand finds his torso, snakes across his stomach and settles against his hipbone. He closes his eyes and allows Yifan to drag him even closer and breathe against his neck.
There’s something off about being held by Yifan, about feeling Yifan’s breathing. It’s been a long time since Yixing’s let someone hold him like this, but in the end it hasn’t meant anything. Maybe this is why being so close to someone is so scary. Yifan could figure out anything about him like this; he can’t hide like this.
“I want you to,” he says, and he really couldn’t mean it more. Yifan’s thumb, that’s been rubbing circles on his hipbone, stills. “But I’m not sure if now is the moment.”
Yifan sighs and his fingers tighten against Yixing. It feels like reassurance.
✦
Skipping work is easier than one would think. Yixing calls in sick on Thursday as Yifan wears his boots and searches for his snapback. On Friday he doesn’t even bother calling, lets HR reach him with the usual questions, ‘why aren’t you at your work post?’, ‘do you intend coming over?’, ‘do you have medical leave?’.
Truth is he doesn’t feel like working. At all. He feels like thrusting his head out the window and breathing the slightly polluted and smelling-like-pork air. He feels like letting Peter Parker nap on the kitchen sink, he feels like shaving his head because his roots are too long and there isn’t any hair dye left. He feels like so many things and he hasn’t felt like this in a long while.
He goes out to the Bangsan Market and shops for baking supplies, things he’s been looking online and wanting for some time. Piping tips and spatulas, bowls and measure spoons. As he looks for food coloring, finds a couple of adorable sprinkles and beads that seem perfect for little eyes and details and buys them too. He buys ingredients and fruits and anything else he thinks will look and taste good on a cake.
On his way back to Sillim-dong, he texts Yifan.
Bought all these baking stuff. Want some cake?
The answer comes right away. i’m at the studio, where are you?
Far from you, Yixing types. Just passed Seongsu station heading to Gwanak.
off around 2pm today. want me to come over? another text pops in. i’ll be seriously hungry then.
He smiles, biting on his lower lip. There will be lots of buttercream for you to eat.
i’ll bring burgers.
That’s how Yixing finds himself surrounded by colorful bowls and meringue all over the counter. He has to fight Peter Parker off his extremely enticing colored cake batter several times (although he’s pretty sure the cat manages to lick a little purple batter that’s dripped onto the counter).
Yifan is on the floor, Yixing’s computer on his lap as he searches for a reliable manner to register a star.
“There are all these sites that allow you to buy a star, or name one whatever,” he frowns at the screen. Yixing wants to move over and smoothen the lines on his forehead. “But I’m not sure if you give it a name it will actually be its name.”
“Is there a website related to the international space station or NASA, I don’t know?” Yixing licks cream off his finger and removes his perfectly baked red and yellow layers for the rainbow cake he decided to fix from the oven before pushing the blue and green ones in.
“No. Actually, I just came across an article explaining that the names we buy are fictional, and no astronomer will ever call the star that name.” Yifan blinks and looks up at Yixing. “Says only the international astronomical union can assign names to celestial objects. Sorry Yixing.”
Huffing, Yixing crosses his arms. “Have I fooled myself my entire life? I’ve always wanted to name a star!”
Closing the computer shut, Yifan stands up and gives a couple of strides to place it on the bed before returning to the kitchen and leaning back against the counter. “We can go star-gazing and just point to some starts giving them names.” he shrugs. “I mean, you need to do this, right? For your list?”
He thinks about it.
There is no actual way of naming a star. For real. He can’t complete this item
“I can’t do this if there’s no way to get it done.”
“Well, if you know an astronomer there’s a way.” Yifan says mirthfully. Yixing rolls his eyes. “Yeah, there’s no way. So what are you going to do now?”
Yixing squints, forcing his mind to come up with a good idea. Turns out he doesn’t even need to think too much.
“I’ll get my own stars.”
6. Name a star or a galaxy Get a star
Yixing gets his cakes out of the oven and drags Yifan to the toy shop near his apartment building. He’s seen little phosphorescent stars and galaxies on sale as decorative items for children’s bedrooms. Yifan laughs at him, but he buys it and they glue it all around Yixing’s apartment. They also name every single one of them. There are twenty stars.
When they finish, Yifan drops on his bed and looks at him. “Star, done. What’s next?”
Yixing nods and drops next to him. “Now comes something meaningful,” and he’s never been this sure.
{item n. 7}