and on that note- we cue the music...
i was talking to a friend from work the other day about the idea of life being mundane. she said she could deal with the hard shit, cause hard shit is something to deal with, and something everyone does have to deal with, and of course that she loves that life is great sometimes too. but what she (and i) have the hardest time coping with is when life is mundane. predictable. boring? and sometimes the mundane creeps up on you and you get used to it until your head almost explodes with it. and then you remember what it was and you get up and do something new. and i think thats basically what life is, keeping the mundane time as short as possible. or at least thats how it is for me.
with this realization i've become even more excited about next year. because for awhile i wasn't, i almost didnt want to go because i knew i had such a great thing going here in the thrill with the best friends i've had in my whole life. and i do have a great thing, but everything comes to an end at some point, or maybe not an end but a change. everything has to change to keep you alive. and i need to stay alive.
i found out today that i might start going on medication for my attention issues. at first i didnt like this idea at all, who am i to take drugs for an issue thats only recently affected my school work, and only in classes that are super hard anyway? but all i know at this point is that i want college to mean something to me, to be a time where i get lost in my studies and while i'll have lots of fun, i want a lot of that fun to actually BE the time i'm doing school work. i want to enjoy learning because i know i do when i'm not dealing with my personal motivation issues. so i've thrown in the proverbial towel and am going to try the medication. who knows, it may be terrible and i'll stop. so just an fyi i'll be on it for a trial period b/4 i leave for college so if i'm weirder (or rather, less weird) than i normally am, that might be why.
with this realization i've become even more excited about next year. because for awhile i wasn't, i almost didnt want to go because i knew i had such a great thing going here in the thrill with the best friends i've had in my whole life. and i do have a great thing, but everything comes to an end at some point, or maybe not an end but a change. everything has to change to keep you alive. and i need to stay alive.
i found out today that i might start going on medication for my attention issues. at first i didnt like this idea at all, who am i to take drugs for an issue thats only recently affected my school work, and only in classes that are super hard anyway? but all i know at this point is that i want college to mean something to me, to be a time where i get lost in my studies and while i'll have lots of fun, i want a lot of that fun to actually BE the time i'm doing school work. i want to enjoy learning because i know i do when i'm not dealing with my personal motivation issues. so i've thrown in the proverbial towel and am going to try the medication. who knows, it may be terrible and i'll stop. so just an fyi i'll be on it for a trial period b/4 i leave for college so if i'm weirder (or rather, less weird) than i normally am, that might be why.