(no subject)
It's early in the morning. too
early to go to class yet. class. sometimes everything seems like one
big practical joke and I really don't care. It's only the first real
week of school and I am already tired. At least I am sleeping.
I forgot my medication this morning. I can tell the difference already. I am sure I won't get sick. I can't believe I forgot to take it. I meant to. It's been a little over a week and my body is already an addict. go figure.
Emery makes me smile. I should have bought their CD sooner. I had always heard of them. And seen the cover-the guy with the fishbowl instead of a head-has always stuck out in my mind. If you don't listen to them try them on for size. The Rocket Summer-Calander Days is also on my list of reccomendations. Try it You'll like it. I really want to make music with more people. Lydia mentioned maybe starting a band. A band that sounds like Emery. That would be fabulous.
I think I am going to quit Old Navy. I can't stand it. I need a job only on Saturdays to save up for a new car. That is what I need. I am going to have to look around. I simply can't deal with clothing anymore. I need to go by and get my paycheck...
I've been doing allot of thinking. thinking about what I am going to do for the rest of my life-as in career-because I know I will make music my whole life. I am thinking about trying the whole photography idea again. Now that I am more focused-I am sure I can figure out how to use my camera. Maybe this weekened. some time soon at any rate. All I need is a career I am good at, that I enjoy to pay my bills and supply money for my music addiction. That is all. As long as I can make music-I"ll be fine. I am really not sure if I want to go to school for record production and such-I can learn that myself. I need one thing for me. That I do for me. I'm sure eventually I will become in the business some how. However, I don't know if I want to pay a bizillion dollars to go to school and learn something Travis can teach me. Speaking of Travis-I am going to try calling him again...I haven't made any decisions yet. I'm looking at LSU and USM. I'll see how I like Belmont. I'll see. I just don't know if I am willing to be in that much debt.
I didn't jump on the opportunity to see Aaron yesterday. vicki called saying George was coming from Baton Rouge and that it is a farther drive than Mandeville. Well he can drive from fucking Shreveport-he can come a little further to the Northshore. She called, I said I'd call her back and I never did. She called again I didn't answer. It is better to avoid the promblem than go and think everything has changed. Because it hasn't. and I know he will never understand. The truth is I am sick and tired of self-depricating people who expect everyone to drop everything when they need something. And they don't care who it is as long as they aren't alone. Even though deep down inside they are alone. Because, in reality they can never get close to anyone. And I don't feel bad about not seeing him. I do not need him. This is over.
I think there is something wrong with my ears.
a taste of Emery
Walls
Are you listening? we write a thousand pages they're torn and on the floor headlights hammer the windows were locked behind these doors and we are never leaving this place is part of us and all these scenes repeating are cold to the touch my hands seem to deceive me when I'm nervous or when I'm healthy. the scenery's all drawn. they hang here from the walls dear, painting pictures, bleeding colors, blanket the windows. sometimes it gets so hard to breathe. your eyes can see right through me. these fights with your arms left beside. one thing and one more says goodnight. you've got the map come get to me. these knuckles break before they bleed. tear out these veins that own my heart. this skin that wears your lasting marks. i've built these walls come get to me, come get to me. is this your lesson, a slight discretion, the lines that keep you, the lines that sweep you. lock the doors from the inside. your face is so contagious, it wears announcements, it leaves me breathless, i won't forget this.let the walls have their say. there's no conversation words without remorse and this television drowns the only source wake from these dreams of you in my arms to the staircase where you hold my heart this place, these walls, mean everything to me.
I forgot my medication this morning. I can tell the difference already. I am sure I won't get sick. I can't believe I forgot to take it. I meant to. It's been a little over a week and my body is already an addict. go figure.
Emery makes me smile. I should have bought their CD sooner. I had always heard of them. And seen the cover-the guy with the fishbowl instead of a head-has always stuck out in my mind. If you don't listen to them try them on for size. The Rocket Summer-Calander Days is also on my list of reccomendations. Try it You'll like it. I really want to make music with more people. Lydia mentioned maybe starting a band. A band that sounds like Emery. That would be fabulous.
I think I am going to quit Old Navy. I can't stand it. I need a job only on Saturdays to save up for a new car. That is what I need. I am going to have to look around. I simply can't deal with clothing anymore. I need to go by and get my paycheck...
I've been doing allot of thinking. thinking about what I am going to do for the rest of my life-as in career-because I know I will make music my whole life. I am thinking about trying the whole photography idea again. Now that I am more focused-I am sure I can figure out how to use my camera. Maybe this weekened. some time soon at any rate. All I need is a career I am good at, that I enjoy to pay my bills and supply money for my music addiction. That is all. As long as I can make music-I"ll be fine. I am really not sure if I want to go to school for record production and such-I can learn that myself. I need one thing for me. That I do for me. I'm sure eventually I will become in the business some how. However, I don't know if I want to pay a bizillion dollars to go to school and learn something Travis can teach me. Speaking of Travis-I am going to try calling him again...I haven't made any decisions yet. I'm looking at LSU and USM. I'll see how I like Belmont. I'll see. I just don't know if I am willing to be in that much debt.
I didn't jump on the opportunity to see Aaron yesterday. vicki called saying George was coming from Baton Rouge and that it is a farther drive than Mandeville. Well he can drive from fucking Shreveport-he can come a little further to the Northshore. She called, I said I'd call her back and I never did. She called again I didn't answer. It is better to avoid the promblem than go and think everything has changed. Because it hasn't. and I know he will never understand. The truth is I am sick and tired of self-depricating people who expect everyone to drop everything when they need something. And they don't care who it is as long as they aren't alone. Even though deep down inside they are alone. Because, in reality they can never get close to anyone. And I don't feel bad about not seeing him. I do not need him. This is over.
I think there is something wrong with my ears.
a taste of Emery
Walls
Are you listening? we write a thousand pages they're torn and on the floor headlights hammer the windows were locked behind these doors and we are never leaving this place is part of us and all these scenes repeating are cold to the touch my hands seem to deceive me when I'm nervous or when I'm healthy. the scenery's all drawn. they hang here from the walls dear, painting pictures, bleeding colors, blanket the windows. sometimes it gets so hard to breathe. your eyes can see right through me. these fights with your arms left beside. one thing and one more says goodnight. you've got the map come get to me. these knuckles break before they bleed. tear out these veins that own my heart. this skin that wears your lasting marks. i've built these walls come get to me, come get to me. is this your lesson, a slight discretion, the lines that keep you, the lines that sweep you. lock the doors from the inside. your face is so contagious, it wears announcements, it leaves me breathless, i won't forget this.let the walls have their say. there's no conversation words without remorse and this television drowns the only source wake from these dreams of you in my arms to the staircase where you hold my heart this place, these walls, mean everything to me.