Why Do I Insist?

May 11, 2004 21:34

I have a vague idea of why I felt compelled to find and download the video showing the beheading of an American citizen, posted earlier today on an Al Quada linked website. Maybe it was because I wasn't supposed to see it. Maybe it was because other people (journalists) got to see it when a few screen shots preceding the video were supposed to be enough for me. It took me awhile, but I found it. And I wish I hadn't.

Still, I can't deny the fact that a handful of sentences and a couple of still shots did NOT affect me anywhere near the way the video did. And amidst the executioners' screams of "God is great," there is an American shriek of terror, of pain, of horror, and it simply lasts way too long.

My body is numb, and I am nauseous.
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