Goodbye Horses.....

[yelizarovo]

So through my boredom expressed through late night random internet surfing, I stumbled upon the song Goodbye Horses by Q Lazzarus. You might recognize the song from Silence of The Lambs in which Buffalo Bill does his famous little dance for the camera but that's beside the point. Looking up Q lazzarus I found a site that had some info on the band and the song, what I learned was somewhat interesting. Apparently in some eastern thought horses represent the 5 senses and when you are able transcend these senses it is referred to as "leaving the horses behind." Needless to say I have been thinking about this a lot. I'm waiting for the day when I can separate myself from all this physical worldly bullshit, all the emotional mind fucks that keep my face glued to the ground and keep my heart in a state of constant panic and psychosis. I'm exhausted, worn out......what's left?? and what happens next??. I Know it's time to start that process, of leaving the horse behind. It wont be easy and who knows how long it will take. All I know is that if I don't do something I'm in trouble. The world has it out for me....or maybe it's my own head and the deleterious aspects of my thoughts that keep me where I am.

I'm must be a masochist. I'm pretty sure of that.

Yeah...