moving (on)

[yearinprayer]

god, let me make this performative utterance:

i forgive her coldness, her bitterness, her stuckness, and her fear
and i forgive my own, whether in reaction or created by my own mind
i forgive her for the cat's fleas and for suggesting i invented the fleas and the itching and....
i forgive her for sighing and sniffling and yawning excessively
and i forgive myself for attaching meaning to it
i forgive her for treating my friends and lovers with disdain
and i forgive myself for generating anger over it
and i forgive myself for staying so long

let me forgive
dissolve my re-sentiment
let me feel once, fully
and then feel anew