blah

[yankman03]

So here I am watching Vinilla Sky for the first time and I am thinking of it all. Here is a guy who had everything and lost it all. He had the girls before hand and afterwards one sticked with him despite it all. I hate it. Granted its the movies and anything can happen, but it sucks. I was dating Becky while working on homecoming and as much as she said she loved me, she couldn't stick with me. She hated me for what I was doing and that it took up so much of my life. It was me trying to better myself and push myself to accomplish something that others thought I couldn't do.

I think what bugs me the most right now is that I don't have someone. This has never bugged me so much. All through my life I was content when I was single. It did not really bug me at all. Yeah at times I wanted someone, but it wasn't a big thing if I was alone.

*As a side note it just got to the part where he went to jail, so kinda happy he got fucked over*

But why is this bugging me? Is it that I cannot live without a girl in my life? Do I just miss the simple parts of the relationship? I think thats what it is cause I am really wanting this stuff. Where is the girl that i fall asleep holding, the one who is there when i get done with the day and puts a smile on my face and makes the day melt away. Ugh this sucks so damn much.