(no subject)
Happy New Year! I'm sorry I've fallen off the face of the planet. My in-laws had monopolized my time all most of the last two weeks. It was so nice to finally meet all of Caleb's sisters and all of my nieces and my nephew.... but I was so exhausted! They completely wore me out! Not to mention I caught some sort of cold from the kids and was snotty sick most of my time off.. I hate being sick. Though it was nice to have a big family holiday like I'm used to, it did make me appreciate all the alone time Caleb and I are used to having. We ARE hermits after all.
But sometimes it turns into this vicious cycle where we are both ignoring each other.. and I get lonely and wonder why he's not paying attention to me.. and then he gets lonely and I'm all ignoring him... and then we're both worried we're ignoring each other when neither one of us care.. Uggg... Maybe it's best we just both work and then enjoy the time we have off together.. I get all mopey when I have too much time on my hands to think.. Much better to work.
As usual, I spent entirely too much money this christmas.. and of course I still have things to ship out. I'm absolutely horrible..
And then I'm all crabby because of what happened last christmas. I was a little late this month and of course I start thinking I might be pregnant... and I always tell myself not to get all worked up about it.. but I always do.. I think I'm addicted to pregnancy tests. Is there such a thing? I just keep thinking I'll find a solution to my issue with kids and work.. When is it time to have kids? Can I go to college and have kids at the same time? Would it be better to just wait?.. I'm hanging on the last one.. but it's hard. I'd be lying if I said I didn't get a little jealous every time I see a little baby..but I would like to go to college and be able to get a good job to take care of my children. Am I too young to be freaking out about this? I think so...
I don't mean to sob to you guys, it's just sometimes I don't have anyone to talk to. even if you don't answer, writing is good for the soul. I'm a little lonely I guess.. >.< sob sob poor me. I'll be fine in a minute.
But sometimes it turns into this vicious cycle where we are both ignoring each other.. and I get lonely and wonder why he's not paying attention to me.. and then he gets lonely and I'm all ignoring him... and then we're both worried we're ignoring each other when neither one of us care.. Uggg... Maybe it's best we just both work and then enjoy the time we have off together.. I get all mopey when I have too much time on my hands to think.. Much better to work.
As usual, I spent entirely too much money this christmas.. and of course I still have things to ship out. I'm absolutely horrible..
And then I'm all crabby because of what happened last christmas. I was a little late this month and of course I start thinking I might be pregnant... and I always tell myself not to get all worked up about it.. but I always do.. I think I'm addicted to pregnancy tests. Is there such a thing? I just keep thinking I'll find a solution to my issue with kids and work.. When is it time to have kids? Can I go to college and have kids at the same time? Would it be better to just wait?.. I'm hanging on the last one.. but it's hard. I'd be lying if I said I didn't get a little jealous every time I see a little baby..but I would like to go to college and be able to get a good job to take care of my children. Am I too young to be freaking out about this? I think so...
I don't mean to sob to you guys, it's just sometimes I don't have anyone to talk to. even if you don't answer, writing is good for the soul. I'm a little lonely I guess.. >.< sob sob poor me. I'll be fine in a minute.