hangin out
today was my sisters birthday. i went with her to see narnia, and later to cici's pizza. narnia was ok. santa claus gave the children weapons. i would rate the movie 5/10, but that gives it bonus points. 6/10.
im so tired of taking shit from people. people get the impression that they can push me around and give me shit constantly. ive just come to accept it, although its always pissed me off. im tired of it, but im having trouble changing this aspect of my personality. I feel like people are always going to get angry and enjoy my company less if i dont put up with their shit. ive gone through phases like this before, but i generally get over it. im tired of getting over it. i want to solve the problem. i end up lashing out at people who arent actually attacking me since im always trying to identify "attacks."
hung out at the house of chris this evening. it was allright. thats when i first started getting the impression that i was overdoing my "don't give me shit" thought process, and i lapsed back into passive silly haha mode. i got a little flustered and left.
i fantasize about having a band sometimes. like today. or just having songs that im proud of. im never satisfied with anything i try to write. whatever.
i keep thinking about what purdue will do to my mood/personality. in essence, im so unsatisfied with those aspects of myself, that i cant ever fully concentrate on anything i try to do. i cringe when i admit that i care deeply about what other people think of me. yuck.
im going christmas shopping tomorrow morning. itll be a fun time. katelyn comes home tomorrow night, late. that will be an even more fun time. hooray. and hooray.
the sharing part of my mind is empty. within the other parts, theres things swirling around, and i wish they would stop. or at least take a rest.
im so tired of taking shit from people. people get the impression that they can push me around and give me shit constantly. ive just come to accept it, although its always pissed me off. im tired of it, but im having trouble changing this aspect of my personality. I feel like people are always going to get angry and enjoy my company less if i dont put up with their shit. ive gone through phases like this before, but i generally get over it. im tired of getting over it. i want to solve the problem. i end up lashing out at people who arent actually attacking me since im always trying to identify "attacks."
hung out at the house of chris this evening. it was allright. thats when i first started getting the impression that i was overdoing my "don't give me shit" thought process, and i lapsed back into passive silly haha mode. i got a little flustered and left.
i fantasize about having a band sometimes. like today. or just having songs that im proud of. im never satisfied with anything i try to write. whatever.
i keep thinking about what purdue will do to my mood/personality. in essence, im so unsatisfied with those aspects of myself, that i cant ever fully concentrate on anything i try to do. i cringe when i admit that i care deeply about what other people think of me. yuck.
im going christmas shopping tomorrow morning. itll be a fun time. katelyn comes home tomorrow night, late. that will be an even more fun time. hooray. and hooray.
the sharing part of my mind is empty. within the other parts, theres things swirling around, and i wish they would stop. or at least take a rest.