I.V.
Title: I.V.
Warnings: emotional problems, character death
Genre: General, angst?
Rating: PG15
Disclaimer: I own nothing at all.
Comments: Inspired by I.V. - X Japan. Titled this after the song, for the lack of better title. Character can be anyone you want, I don’t really have anyone particular in mind when writing this. I’m not sure how things are written on tombstone; so don’t blame me if I wrote it wrongly. Please do correct me if you know the correct way though. It’s very short. I’m not really happy with it =/
I can feel my emotions bubbling, slow and furious within me like boiling water. The hurt, the anger, and turmoil in me, were just about ready to erupt, far too much for me to handle, and it’s making me feeling nauseas; I can feel a headache building up. I run my fingers through my hair in frustration to then stop at the back of my head, gripping my hair tightly in a clutch with my head bowing down low. Tears of desperation gather in my eyes like fire, burning, threatening to spill out as I squeeze my eyes shut tight.
A pained groan passes through my lips, and I stand up abruptly from my couch in my own suffocating apartment, managing to knock it over with a dull thud. My hands clenches tightly into fists by my sides as I glare at down on the carpet, my vision going fuzzy, digging my nails deep and hard into my skin, breaking it. Ragged breath passes through my mouth as I pant hard. I feel my body shaking violently and I think I am going to have a seizure.
I shift my drowsy gaze to my left, on top of the piano on the other side of the room I was in, to photo frames of all sizes lined up and filled with pictures of us, our memories, our past… With a snarl, I stagger towards the piano and knock the smaller and medium sized photo frames to the floor, my heart shattering like pieces imitating the broken photo frames. Finally with the last frame standing, the biggest frame of them all, the frame that contains my most wonderful, happiest memory before you had gone and ruined it all with that thing. I pick it up with trembling hands with a shaky sigh and I touch the picture of your face, droplets falling onto the glass like the beginnings of rain.
I sniff loudly as more tears fell. I hug the frame closely to my chest, closing my eyes shut again, crying loudly. Why, why?! I ask myself. Why did you choose to leave me? Didn’t I show you my love? I had always been there when you needed me. Left my heart lying on a platter just for you to do whatever you wished to it. I’ve done more. What went wrong? Did I displease you in anyway? Answer me! Tell me please, tell me all the wrongs I have done. It is just like you to be this cruel. And it’s just like me to have let you.
With a silent goodbye, I hold the frame high above my head, and, mustering all the strength I had in me, I threw the frame as far as I could. It hit the opposite wall with a loud shatter and the last fragment of my heart shatters along with it. I let out a deep breath that I didn’t realize I was holding in. I look up at the ceiling, wiping my tears away and blinking rapidly to keep from more tears. When I was sure that no more tears would come again, I made my way to our- no, my room, intending to sleep awhile for I feel the fatigue from crying catching up with me. I make sure that I do not look at the mess I had made on the floor. Hopefully by the time I wake up it would be cleared by one of my band mates. The pain is still too raw to approach. Maybe hopefully when I wake up from this nightmare, you will be by my side again, and I still can cling to you and seek comfort in you, cry in your shirt about my nightmare as you stroke my hair, soothing me in every way possible that you know of. Yes, you’ll do that. Yes, this is all just a nightmare. Yes, yes…
-A few days later-
Engraved on the tombstone, this was written:
XXX XXXX XXXX
1987 - 2008
He journed east, with pills claiming his very last breath.