Coming to an end to experience a new begining
As of friday marks my two weeks until I arrive at about 2:30 pm on the run way or regan national airport in washington dc. begining once again another year of college, realizing it really is half over. Its amazing how nearly 21 years of a life can pass by so quickly. i look back and see how I have come from so much. experienced so much, and felt so much. I remember as a two year old in our town house in chicago sitting, eating cherrios, and watching tv, to today as i sit here nearly 21 years old contemplating how i will pay back my loans for college, looking forward to seeing my friends again at school and building on my life, and remembering the great times i have had this summer with my friends down here. Life is full of pain, happiness, and love. but everything one experiences is never wasted. i realize this now more than ever. a life is a life. it is yours and no one elses. if you dont do something with it than no one else will. im not saying i have wasted my life by any means, but i feel as though i have not fully explored and experienced it to the extent i can. the past year of my life has been i can honestly say one of the happiest and saddest i can recall. but through all this through everything i have been through, seen, and done, it all comes back around to realizing who i am. finally i see me for me. i can understand myself, my needs, my wants, my desires. no matter what the situation, if you do not come away from an event in your life learning something then you should take a second look. life is a serious of learning opportunites. put there to build for the next, to be more prepared, to feel more yourself. i feel whole in my being of understanding what i want and who i am. but at the same time i come to a point where for the first time in my life i dont have a set plan for everything, i dont know exactly where i will be tomorrow. ironically enough that is more comforting than i ever could have thought. i have goals of what i want to accomplish and ideas of how i want to get there. but i do not have specific expectations of what will happen tomorrow or even in the next second. its an amazing feeling. it makes me more eager to keep moving, live life and see what comes next. isnt that the beauty of what we enjoy, the thrill of possibility, the chance taken of what may be lossed or gained. sometimes to really think thoroughly about something doesnt require any thought at all. in any case through all of this i find a new appreciation for the world around me and myself as well. being able to feel good about yourself and trust yourself is so important. its difficult for me to fully articulate the ideas and feelings i have inside of me, especially when typing them and not saying them. i guess i just wish to everyone that they can experience their lives to the extent that they deserve and realize the times to that mean the most.
In other less philosophical news, last week on thursday went to the factory to see the pc tyrants and breathing chemistry play. as usual the tyrants were great. the last time i saw them was over a year ago and you can tell how much they have matured musically and how comfortable they are as a band since then. michael put in his lj that he and evan have been in the same band together for 6 years! thats insane to me. that shows a lot in friendship and creative ability that from such a young age they have both matured in a way that they still can make music together. anyways, then i got to see breathing chemistry play live for the first time. those guys blew me away. so amazing. seriously i was speechless after and had trouble watching any other band play after them because they just didnt even match up. those guys have a future i know it. had to say goodbye to jess that night, the first to leave, shes an awsome person and i cant stress enough how awsome she has been. keep it up trick. fri night we saw garden state. seriously amazing movie. i have been telling all people they need to see it. the ideas of that movie culminate so much of what i have experience lately in one way or another in coming to terms with life and what is worth it to me, and what is most important. go see it. now! then this weekend i hung out with greg and the ross sisters at aventura mall. i got an awsome track jacket and a shirt that says "canada...it fits your budget" from urban out fitters, two very good purchases i feel. hehe. then we hung out at gregs last night, watched the big labowski, funny ass movie, then crashed. saw my cousin brian today which was cool, and now i am home relaxing. i better get to see everyone before they leave for school! i know a lot of you leave this week! anyways i have typed a lot and i am out for now. peace oot.
In other less philosophical news, last week on thursday went to the factory to see the pc tyrants and breathing chemistry play. as usual the tyrants were great. the last time i saw them was over a year ago and you can tell how much they have matured musically and how comfortable they are as a band since then. michael put in his lj that he and evan have been in the same band together for 6 years! thats insane to me. that shows a lot in friendship and creative ability that from such a young age they have both matured in a way that they still can make music together. anyways, then i got to see breathing chemistry play live for the first time. those guys blew me away. so amazing. seriously i was speechless after and had trouble watching any other band play after them because they just didnt even match up. those guys have a future i know it. had to say goodbye to jess that night, the first to leave, shes an awsome person and i cant stress enough how awsome she has been. keep it up trick. fri night we saw garden state. seriously amazing movie. i have been telling all people they need to see it. the ideas of that movie culminate so much of what i have experience lately in one way or another in coming to terms with life and what is worth it to me, and what is most important. go see it. now! then this weekend i hung out with greg and the ross sisters at aventura mall. i got an awsome track jacket and a shirt that says "canada...it fits your budget" from urban out fitters, two very good purchases i feel. hehe. then we hung out at gregs last night, watched the big labowski, funny ass movie, then crashed. saw my cousin brian today which was cool, and now i am home relaxing. i better get to see everyone before they leave for school! i know a lot of you leave this week! anyways i have typed a lot and i am out for now. peace oot.