Yes it's another 9-11 post
To those of you who think it is no big deal, you're entitled to that opinion. However, look at it this way, when you lose a family member or a close friend, do you not tend to think fondly of them, remember them, and reminisce about them on holidays and such when all the rest of your family members are surrounding you? At least you have a gathering of people on the holiday to provide support if you are still grieving over the loss of a loved one. For some people it takes longer than others. Typically, it's made easier because you have a funeral, you get to say goodbye, you get closure.
The families of the majority of 9-11 victims didn't get that closure. The overwhelming emotions that hit them that day, the many factors of the situation, prevented them from grieving according the 'typical' process. When someone in your family dies, you get that closure. Everyone grieves differently. If you lost someone that day and you feel like it's just a 'bunch of shit' that people are still celebrating the memory of those they lost then you are entitled to that opinion, you have that right as someone who was affected. But please be respectful of those who are still trying to cope with the magnitude of loss suffered that day.
They lost a loved one.
They possibly had to alter their entire life course.
Re-Evaluate how to survive financially, emotionally, physically.
Soothe their children.
Explain to their children when they asked why? why?
And then, attempt to grieve in their own way.
We spend a lifetime trying to find our 'soul mate' someone to love for the rest of our lives.
That day, some people lost that person.
We say how frustrated or sad we are because we can't find that person and we're sick of waiting,
wouldn't it be worse to find them, be as happy as love allows, and then have them taken from you?
Viciously? Senselessly? Violently? Instantly? No warning.
Attempt to find closure without the benefit of one last look,
without the benefit of a gravesite to visit,
in some cases, not one fragment of their body was found.
Their world itself was threatened.
Their country, their safety and the safety of all they love.
The safety of their way of life, of everything they appreciate or take for granted.
It can take people years to come to terms with a death...a 'normal' death.
I can only imagine how long it would take to come to terms with something so horrific, a way of losing someone that prevents you from any of the 'common courtesies' of loss and grieving.
Not to mention, instead of just a loving reminisce relaxing after a holiday family meal, you have it highly publicized in the mass media. Unless you hide in your house and don't step outside for a week before and a week after, don't listen to the T.V. don't turn on a radio, don't look at a calendar. There is no way for these people to escape this, a random day in the middle of their week is a glaring reminder of what they lost, what we all lost.
Do you not ever think back on someone you lost? Think of a memory that causes you to have a 'sad moment'... a momentary lapse no matter how long it's been, no matter how many years have passed by, no matter how well you think you are over it, no matter how well your grieving process went. These people had to go to work today. They had to face people and function on a day that might have made them want to crawl into a dark space, ignore the world and reflect. One moment out of your day to recognize what your fellow men and women of this country had to go through on that day, or even what you had to go through whether you lost someone or not, is not too much to ask.
Out of respect, out of kindness, out of compassion, out of humanity, or out of obligation because at some point in your life, or some point in your future, someone will be kind and considerate of you, or has been considerate of you. Somewhere in your life a person has taken a moment to brighten your day and remind you to smile. Someone has lent you a dollar to buy something, or loaned you their car when yours quit running, or offered you gas money to get to work, or bought you a nice meal just to let you know you're appreciated.
It's humanity. Not everyone practices it, not everyone sees it's value. At some point in our life we are all treated badly. But that does not mean we should turn our backs on humanity and basic decency and in turn treat someone else badly because it was done to us. It will then become a vicious cycle that will never end.
Does no one understand this? It isn't necessary to remember 9-11 just to cry and be sad about what was lost, it's a chance to celebrate those lost lives. A chance to remember them. A chance to teach the children of the victims or the children of our future how they lived, what should be valued most in life... family, love, friendship, unity. Those that DID NOT lose anyone that day, who were not directly affected, can still take this day to be a day of learning, teaching, growing. A day to hug your family and remember to let them know how much you love them and care for them. So that if it happens again, and you lose someone, or they lose you... it will be easier to get closure, because I love you was said, I would miss you if it happened to us was understood. So that we can remind our family that we do not take them for granted.
I live my life that way as much as possible. I am not perfect and never will I say that I am. I try my hardest every day to give a little back. I have been fortunate to receive many things in this life from others. I have learned many things. I have grown and matured as a person, sometimes from hardship, sometimes for positive achievement.
No matter what, I give back to the society I live in. I give back to everyone, whether they have given to me, or simply just give to them so that they may pass it on to the next person.
It has to start somewhere. Love doesn't grow on trees.
The families of the majority of 9-11 victims didn't get that closure. The overwhelming emotions that hit them that day, the many factors of the situation, prevented them from grieving according the 'typical' process. When someone in your family dies, you get that closure. Everyone grieves differently. If you lost someone that day and you feel like it's just a 'bunch of shit' that people are still celebrating the memory of those they lost then you are entitled to that opinion, you have that right as someone who was affected. But please be respectful of those who are still trying to cope with the magnitude of loss suffered that day.
They lost a loved one.
They possibly had to alter their entire life course.
Re-Evaluate how to survive financially, emotionally, physically.
Soothe their children.
Explain to their children when they asked why? why?
And then, attempt to grieve in their own way.
We spend a lifetime trying to find our 'soul mate' someone to love for the rest of our lives.
That day, some people lost that person.
We say how frustrated or sad we are because we can't find that person and we're sick of waiting,
wouldn't it be worse to find them, be as happy as love allows, and then have them taken from you?
Viciously? Senselessly? Violently? Instantly? No warning.
Attempt to find closure without the benefit of one last look,
without the benefit of a gravesite to visit,
in some cases, not one fragment of their body was found.
Their world itself was threatened.
Their country, their safety and the safety of all they love.
The safety of their way of life, of everything they appreciate or take for granted.
It can take people years to come to terms with a death...a 'normal' death.
I can only imagine how long it would take to come to terms with something so horrific, a way of losing someone that prevents you from any of the 'common courtesies' of loss and grieving.
Not to mention, instead of just a loving reminisce relaxing after a holiday family meal, you have it highly publicized in the mass media. Unless you hide in your house and don't step outside for a week before and a week after, don't listen to the T.V. don't turn on a radio, don't look at a calendar. There is no way for these people to escape this, a random day in the middle of their week is a glaring reminder of what they lost, what we all lost.
Do you not ever think back on someone you lost? Think of a memory that causes you to have a 'sad moment'... a momentary lapse no matter how long it's been, no matter how many years have passed by, no matter how well you think you are over it, no matter how well your grieving process went. These people had to go to work today. They had to face people and function on a day that might have made them want to crawl into a dark space, ignore the world and reflect. One moment out of your day to recognize what your fellow men and women of this country had to go through on that day, or even what you had to go through whether you lost someone or not, is not too much to ask.
Out of respect, out of kindness, out of compassion, out of humanity, or out of obligation because at some point in your life, or some point in your future, someone will be kind and considerate of you, or has been considerate of you. Somewhere in your life a person has taken a moment to brighten your day and remind you to smile. Someone has lent you a dollar to buy something, or loaned you their car when yours quit running, or offered you gas money to get to work, or bought you a nice meal just to let you know you're appreciated.
It's humanity. Not everyone practices it, not everyone sees it's value. At some point in our life we are all treated badly. But that does not mean we should turn our backs on humanity and basic decency and in turn treat someone else badly because it was done to us. It will then become a vicious cycle that will never end.
Does no one understand this? It isn't necessary to remember 9-11 just to cry and be sad about what was lost, it's a chance to celebrate those lost lives. A chance to remember them. A chance to teach the children of the victims or the children of our future how they lived, what should be valued most in life... family, love, friendship, unity. Those that DID NOT lose anyone that day, who were not directly affected, can still take this day to be a day of learning, teaching, growing. A day to hug your family and remember to let them know how much you love them and care for them. So that if it happens again, and you lose someone, or they lose you... it will be easier to get closure, because I love you was said, I would miss you if it happened to us was understood. So that we can remind our family that we do not take them for granted.
I live my life that way as much as possible. I am not perfect and never will I say that I am. I try my hardest every day to give a little back. I have been fortunate to receive many things in this life from others. I have learned many things. I have grown and matured as a person, sometimes from hardship, sometimes for positive achievement.
No matter what, I give back to the society I live in. I give back to everyone, whether they have given to me, or simply just give to them so that they may pass it on to the next person.
It has to start somewhere. Love doesn't grow on trees.