(no subject)
it's weird being here, in the deep forest, when everything is happening and the END is coming. I feel like i'm part of it for whatever reason and i feel like my year in oakland more or less never existed. I said to isabelle one day a while ago "Don't you think i sometimes just wonder why i don't live in Santa Rosa and stay with you guys and love you guys and make art there?" I'm not sure i know what oakland has given me yet, and i'm not sure i'm weighing it's merits accurately, but!, regardless, when i'm back home for that specific amount of time it takes I always start thinking of ways to not travel everywhere i've wanted to, to not learn everything i've wanted in college, to not meet the people i haven't met yet, and to just stay here and keep fixing/making/cutting/pasting the future with everyone whose face i instantly recognize and whose tricks i pretty much know.