[Sorra]
Lucean asked me to meet him at the Scarlet Monestary. I was naively believed it was because he knows of my love of books. The monastery has a great many in their library that I'd love to read, but have simply never gotten the opportunity to do so.
When I arrived his expression was different; harder and more edgy that I'd ever witnessed. When I asked what we were doing, he said he was showing me the side of him that I'd yet to see. And with that he walked away, twirling his spear with deft movements. As we walked toward the monastery he casually slaughtered everyone he came across.
I watched in numb horror as he used his powers, which are formidable, to slice, sicken and decompose all the Scarlet Crusaders he came in contact with. I had to use my scarf to cover my face for the stench of the disease and death he left in his wake made me feel ill.
It took him about twenty minutes to make it to the end of the armory corridor. And when I couldn't take it anymore, I crawled away from the pile of corpses he made and collapsed. All that death, all that havoc and it was from just one man; Lucean.
While I was upset that he'd murdered so many so ruthlessly; the only thing I could think of at that time was, "Is he going to do the same to me someday?" And so I asked him. He looked at me, pointed his spear at my throat and said it would be all to easy to do it. I could feel his undead powers pulsing around me in the air. He pulled back his spear and I lifted my chin. If I were to die by this man's hand, then I would do it with dignity. I wouldn't run away like a coward and allow him to put the spear through my back. A part of me was thinking that it was probably best if I died by Lucean's hand since it was obvious I'd misjudged him so greatly.
When he let the spear fly, however, it missed my neck by scant inches and buried itself in the stone floor behind me. I felt tears pool in my eyes, though whether they were from relief or upset I didn't know. And then he said he could never hurt me. And that's when the sobbing began.
I felt broken inside. How could I care for such a man? He is so many things, but it would seem beyond all that he is a killer. The things he does are evil. But I do not~ No, cannot believe he is evil himself.
He apologized to me and offered me a handkerchief for my tears. I asked him if he cared for me. He said he cared more than he thought he'd ever been capable of. He seemed to change then, to become worried and upset that he'd scared me so. I honestly have never been so scared in my life.
He asked me what I thought of him after seeing him as he is in battle and I said with only a small amount of hesitation that the things he does are evil. He agreed. Then I asked him if he thought he would be different if he hadn't died. He said he thought so.
Perhaps it was stupid and foolish of me, but I asked him to come back with me to Eversong. When I teleported us there, I changed our clothing into simple robes, then led him across the river on my family estate to a small island. And when we got there I asked him to kiss me. He seemed hesitant and asked if I was sure, even after what I had witness. I told him yes. And as he kissed me I knew I'd given him my heart.
I am stupid and foolish for believing that anything good can come of this. But as we lay in one another's arms in my bed, hours later, I couldn't help but feel content and happy. I was happy. And that's not something I've truly been for a long time.
He is so very gentle with me. His touch, his kiss, even when he bites me he doesn't break the skin or even bruise me. The man melts me into a puddle. At first I thought it would bother me to sleep with an undead man, but it's not obvious, beyond his cool skin, that he's dead. And since my skin is just as cool, I'm hardly one to complain.
I'm not so stupid and foolish as to believe that Lucean can ever love me in return. He cares, but I just don't think he'll ever be capable of love. And I suppose that's for the best. He'll move on soon, I'm sure, for why would he continue to return now that he's broken down all of my defenses? It will hurt, of course, it always does, but perhaps it's better this way. I don't think I could stand to have him linger.
Stupid and foolish and yet, though I am no longer innocent, still ridiculously naive. Because even now, when I know this cannot last, I hope it does. I'll never have a fairy tale, but even a dark knight is better than no knight at all--isn't it?
I cannot put aside the memories of his evil acts. Those will always be in my mind when I look at him for those things he did without remorse. He only regretted that he'd upset me by showing them to me. Yet I feel that if he can open up as he has with me, perhaps he can continue to do so. Perhaps with my good example he'll see that he doesn't need to find peace in death any longer.
When I arrived his expression was different; harder and more edgy that I'd ever witnessed. When I asked what we were doing, he said he was showing me the side of him that I'd yet to see. And with that he walked away, twirling his spear with deft movements. As we walked toward the monastery he casually slaughtered everyone he came across.
I watched in numb horror as he used his powers, which are formidable, to slice, sicken and decompose all the Scarlet Crusaders he came in contact with. I had to use my scarf to cover my face for the stench of the disease and death he left in his wake made me feel ill.
It took him about twenty minutes to make it to the end of the armory corridor. And when I couldn't take it anymore, I crawled away from the pile of corpses he made and collapsed. All that death, all that havoc and it was from just one man; Lucean.
While I was upset that he'd murdered so many so ruthlessly; the only thing I could think of at that time was, "Is he going to do the same to me someday?" And so I asked him. He looked at me, pointed his spear at my throat and said it would be all to easy to do it. I could feel his undead powers pulsing around me in the air. He pulled back his spear and I lifted my chin. If I were to die by this man's hand, then I would do it with dignity. I wouldn't run away like a coward and allow him to put the spear through my back. A part of me was thinking that it was probably best if I died by Lucean's hand since it was obvious I'd misjudged him so greatly.
When he let the spear fly, however, it missed my neck by scant inches and buried itself in the stone floor behind me. I felt tears pool in my eyes, though whether they were from relief or upset I didn't know. And then he said he could never hurt me. And that's when the sobbing began.
I felt broken inside. How could I care for such a man? He is so many things, but it would seem beyond all that he is a killer. The things he does are evil. But I do not~ No, cannot believe he is evil himself.
He apologized to me and offered me a handkerchief for my tears. I asked him if he cared for me. He said he cared more than he thought he'd ever been capable of. He seemed to change then, to become worried and upset that he'd scared me so. I honestly have never been so scared in my life.
He asked me what I thought of him after seeing him as he is in battle and I said with only a small amount of hesitation that the things he does are evil. He agreed. Then I asked him if he thought he would be different if he hadn't died. He said he thought so.
Perhaps it was stupid and foolish of me, but I asked him to come back with me to Eversong. When I teleported us there, I changed our clothing into simple robes, then led him across the river on my family estate to a small island. And when we got there I asked him to kiss me. He seemed hesitant and asked if I was sure, even after what I had witness. I told him yes. And as he kissed me I knew I'd given him my heart.
I am stupid and foolish for believing that anything good can come of this. But as we lay in one another's arms in my bed, hours later, I couldn't help but feel content and happy. I was happy. And that's not something I've truly been for a long time.
He is so very gentle with me. His touch, his kiss, even when he bites me he doesn't break the skin or even bruise me. The man melts me into a puddle. At first I thought it would bother me to sleep with an undead man, but it's not obvious, beyond his cool skin, that he's dead. And since my skin is just as cool, I'm hardly one to complain.
I'm not so stupid and foolish as to believe that Lucean can ever love me in return. He cares, but I just don't think he'll ever be capable of love. And I suppose that's for the best. He'll move on soon, I'm sure, for why would he continue to return now that he's broken down all of my defenses? It will hurt, of course, it always does, but perhaps it's better this way. I don't think I could stand to have him linger.
Stupid and foolish and yet, though I am no longer innocent, still ridiculously naive. Because even now, when I know this cannot last, I hope it does. I'll never have a fairy tale, but even a dark knight is better than no knight at all--isn't it?
I cannot put aside the memories of his evil acts. Those will always be in my mind when I look at him for those things he did without remorse. He only regretted that he'd upset me by showing them to me. Yet I feel that if he can open up as he has with me, perhaps he can continue to do so. Perhaps with my good example he'll see that he doesn't need to find peace in death any longer.