Cheescake Memories
Writing in a journal every day is one of my missed memories. I can't write in a journal every day like I used to. My journal was where I would write every single emotion I had over Steve. Steve was my main character and he was the boy I obsessed about for pages, pages, books, and chapters.
But, as much as I thought that book consisted of Steve reading back taught me different. There was more to me than a boy I loved. I wrote about everything. I wrote about my day in school, to the best memories I ever had. To the littest details I would of forgotten about. Reading my journals now reminds me that life is all planned out and even though you have the power to change it, the details of what's going to happen in the future is there.
I would of never remembered that you walked me home one day and asked me if I gotten home alright the next day, or I would of never remember you buying me a cookie with a heart on it for valentines day.
I would never remember the things Chelsea and I did since we did so much. How much we used to talk, how much we used to be close. How we walked aimlessly around her neighborhood on Halloween talking until all our emotions were now disappearing in the air. You and I can always walk aimlessly around the neighborhood for hours and have great conversations. Our conversations are what keeps us as friends because those journals reminded me that I always need those conversations. Always did and Always will. Even if our worlds are split in two.
I wrote about the first time hanging out with Megan, how weird it was without Tianay. But I felt like I found a whole new world to something I never knew was out there. We searched, we roadtripped, we mapped every thing out. We pin point our destination and we seeked for something new. Our cameras were pinned to our side as we took pictures of everything. That hayride, jumping on you because I was so afraid. How much do I miss when we didn't ran out of things to do.
I wrote about when I first met you to the last of you. My journals was your life, from the beginning to the end. I have grown out of you so I have grown out of my journals.
But how much do I miss those journals. I can write but I don't need to sort anything out with me anymore. I am pretty stable (as I can say for now). Im attending Villa Maria in the Fall for photography. For anyone to bring down my dreams of being a photographer will be sorry when I am noticed. Because, I promise I will be so driven that I will be known for my photos. Nobody will bring down my ego, I am as tough as rocks and I may of had some falling through points throughout the two years. I had some people hit my certain points, but I have learned to smile and laugh it off because they are just unknowing of my abilities as so am I.
I believe in myself,
I miss my past,
and I miss my journals,
But I can't get back into the habit because your out of my life for once and that was the puzzle I had to solve.
The most hardest puzzle I ever had to figure out.
But, I did it.
And damn, does it feel great to be free and love again.
This gives me all the enegry to push forward.
But, as much as I thought that book consisted of Steve reading back taught me different. There was more to me than a boy I loved. I wrote about everything. I wrote about my day in school, to the best memories I ever had. To the littest details I would of forgotten about. Reading my journals now reminds me that life is all planned out and even though you have the power to change it, the details of what's going to happen in the future is there.
I would of never remembered that you walked me home one day and asked me if I gotten home alright the next day, or I would of never remember you buying me a cookie with a heart on it for valentines day.
I would never remember the things Chelsea and I did since we did so much. How much we used to talk, how much we used to be close. How we walked aimlessly around her neighborhood on Halloween talking until all our emotions were now disappearing in the air. You and I can always walk aimlessly around the neighborhood for hours and have great conversations. Our conversations are what keeps us as friends because those journals reminded me that I always need those conversations. Always did and Always will. Even if our worlds are split in two.
I wrote about the first time hanging out with Megan, how weird it was without Tianay. But I felt like I found a whole new world to something I never knew was out there. We searched, we roadtripped, we mapped every thing out. We pin point our destination and we seeked for something new. Our cameras were pinned to our side as we took pictures of everything. That hayride, jumping on you because I was so afraid. How much do I miss when we didn't ran out of things to do.
I wrote about when I first met you to the last of you. My journals was your life, from the beginning to the end. I have grown out of you so I have grown out of my journals.
But how much do I miss those journals. I can write but I don't need to sort anything out with me anymore. I am pretty stable (as I can say for now). Im attending Villa Maria in the Fall for photography. For anyone to bring down my dreams of being a photographer will be sorry when I am noticed. Because, I promise I will be so driven that I will be known for my photos. Nobody will bring down my ego, I am as tough as rocks and I may of had some falling through points throughout the two years. I had some people hit my certain points, but I have learned to smile and laugh it off because they are just unknowing of my abilities as so am I.
I believe in myself,
I miss my past,
and I miss my journals,
But I can't get back into the habit because your out of my life for once and that was the puzzle I had to solve.
The most hardest puzzle I ever had to figure out.
But, I did it.
And damn, does it feel great to be free and love again.
This gives me all the enegry to push forward.