(no subject)
Well, I had another close-call with the whole suicide thing last night, and frankly I think the only thing that stopped me was the fact that "vein" rhymes with "drain," so I couldn't bear the thought of slitting my wrists in the shower. And today I was entertaining thoughts of hanging myself from a tree outside the main offices. No reason why, I wasn't even particularly depressed (as I recall about eight hours later).
I'm pretty fucked up.
Anyway, it may be a new setting, but it's a similar plot. I noticed that Justin is now in a relationship with someone, and I couldn't stand the fact that it's not me. Even though I really and truly do LOVE him, he's about three hours away, never had an interest in me to start with, and is WAY happier now than he's ever been, I still can't find it in myself to just be happy for him instead of jealous of Eric (if that is indeed who he's with).
I'm pretty fucked up.
I'm gonna go ahead and say right now, a boy isn't something to lose my life over, but sometimes, especially late at night, I can't help the way I feel about stuff. Sure, it's irrational, but I think I'm just too much of an emotional extremist. When I'm good, I'm really great, when the pendulum swings the other way...well, let's just look at precedent (sic?).
Wow, the Enlightenment writers would just have a field day with me.
I'm pretty fucked up.
Anyway, it may be a new setting, but it's a similar plot. I noticed that Justin is now in a relationship with someone, and I couldn't stand the fact that it's not me. Even though I really and truly do LOVE him, he's about three hours away, never had an interest in me to start with, and is WAY happier now than he's ever been, I still can't find it in myself to just be happy for him instead of jealous of Eric (if that is indeed who he's with).
I'm pretty fucked up.
I'm gonna go ahead and say right now, a boy isn't something to lose my life over, but sometimes, especially late at night, I can't help the way I feel about stuff. Sure, it's irrational, but I think I'm just too much of an emotional extremist. When I'm good, I'm really great, when the pendulum swings the other way...well, let's just look at precedent (sic?).
Wow, the Enlightenment writers would just have a field day with me.